A lot can happen in a year
by demetriaxo
Summary: This isn't Mitchie and Alex. It's Demi and Selena. Selena is going through some rough times at home and school. When someone rapes her, it causes big, life changing problems. Can her new teacher Miss Lovato make it better? I think she can. WARNING: TRAGIC SORYLINES AND MATURE EVENTS.
1. I like you Miley

A/N – This is a new story I'm working on. I probably won't continue any of the other ones because I have lost focus with them all but I will try my upmost hardest to carry on and finish this. Hopefully you will like it. It's Selena and Demi once again:) It's not all relationship at the moment, it's a lot about Selena's homelife and things she's going through but it WILL eventually be SEMI so please read still. Hope you like it.

**MONDAY – BEFORE SCHOOL**

Selena and Taylor were sitting underneath the tree behind their classroom, a place in which they always sat before school started.

"So what do you reckon the new teach will be like?"

"I dunno Tay, I doubt I'll like them."

"You don't like any of the teachers Sel."

"I know, that's why I doubt it."

"Maybe you'll like this one."

"Yeah, once again I doubt it."

"You're gonna cause so much shit aren't you?"

"When do I never."

"Touché, now come on, we're already late."

"Oh well."

The two girls got up from under the tree and headed to their classroom. As they walked towards the door, the voice of their new teacher could be heard loud and clear.

"Oh my god! She sounds way too cheery."

"That could be a good thing, Selena."

"How so?"

"That means she's nice."

"Yeah well cheery pisses me the fuck off."

The girls had been so deep in conversation, they hadn't noticed that the door was now open and the new teacher was stood there staring at them.

"What's your name sweetie?"

"It's Taylor."

"Okay Taylor, have a seat."

Taylor walked past her and took a seat in the classroom.

"Hello, I am Miss Lovato, and you'd be?"

"Selena."

"Oh Selena, hey. Well you have detention after school and we'll see how cheery I am then, and whether it pisses you the fuck off."

"That's so not fair."

"Oh well. Now take a seat."

Selena barged past Miss Lovato and took her seat next to Taylor.

**SELENA'S POV – TUTOR AND 1****ST**** LESSON (MATHS)**

If she wasn't so hot I'd be way pissed. See that's the thing. I think I may like girls. But I don't want people to know. The only person who knows is Miley. She's my best friend next to Taylor and she's the only one I could tell.

I'd been so focused checking Miss Lovato out that I hadn't noticed she was talking to me.

"SELENA."

"What?"

"I asked you a question."

"Well I wasn't listening."

"Why are you being so rude. I am your new form tutor and maths teacher, you're not making a very good impression."

"Do you really think I give a fuck about impressions? You're lucky I'm even here."

"Yeah I'm so lucky."

I smiled sweetly at her, hoping that she'd just drop it.

"Well since you don't want to answer my questions now, you can answer them tonight in detention."

"Oh yay!"

She went on with the lesson after that and I started to feel over whelmed with my thought towards the hot girl. Whenever she bent over to pick something up or to help a student, all I could think about was how good her ass looked. Whenever she moved a certain way her top slid down and revealed a bit of cleavage and I was just transfixed.

That's how the entire lesson went. I just stared at her and fantasised. It was going to be so hard having a crush on my teacher!

As soon as we were dismissed I darted out. Ignoring her call after me.

"I'll see you tonight, Selena."

For once I was dreading the fact that I had gotten myself into trouble.

Luckily Taylor hadn't seemed to notice the way I had acted.

"You are in shit already and that was our first lesson."

"Yeah, I doubt it will be the last time."

"Yeah, we do have English next, you know with Friles."

"That annoying, evil twat?"

"No! The super hot, young, fitty."

"He is NOT hot! And he hates me."

"Yeah, you did tell him that he smelt of piss. That he looked like he lived in a pig's pen and that he probably wasn't gonna get any sex because he was so repulsive."

"Yeah well, he gave me an F."

"Yes he did. But the assignment was to write an essay with 1000 words. You only wrote 7 and they were 'I don't give a fuck about English.'"

"Yeah well, at least it was true."

"Yeah, kay. Come on we have to go in, and at least try to be nice."

**2****ND**** LESSON (MATHS)**

We walked in and Friles immediately sent daggers in my direction.

"You alright, Friles?"

"Sit down Selena."

"You try to be nice and bam you get shot down. Why do I bother?"

"Sit Selena!"

"Geesh I'm not a dog."

"Had me fooled."

"Oh ha ha! So mature Mr Teacher man. Does it make you feel good to insult sixteen year old girls? You must have a sad sad life. And also, sweetie, if you think I'm a dog then you're gonna find it hard getting a girlfriend because me? I'm hot! You know it, I know it, Tay knows it, everyone knows it. Ain't no one better than me so good luck. Oh and by the way I will sit now."

I sat down and everyone began to laugh.

"You said you were gonna be nice."

"Yeah I tried."

"Yeah so hard."

"Sorry Tay."

I smiled sweetly at my best friend and she just laughed back.

"That's it detention tonight."

"As much as I'd love to spend the night with you Friles, I already have a detention."

"How could you? This is second lesson."

"Yeah well… Let's just say me and the new maths teacher don't get along."

"Ahh Miss Lovato."

"Yeah, that's the one."

"Well I'm sure she wouldn't mind adding another hour onto your detention for me."

"Yeah cause she's gonna do that."

"She's a very nice woman, I'm sure she will."

"Yeah… K. Has someone got a cruuushh?"

"Selena, shut up!"

"Have I hit a soft spot?"

"Do you want to be sent out?"

"Why? So you can tell everyone how much you love Miss Lovato?"

"Out! Now!"

"K. Cya sir:)"

I walked out laughing and shut the door behind me. I pulled out my phone and started texting Miley.

**S:Hey miles where you at?xxx**

**M:In Maths-.- I'm so bored but the new teacher seems nice xxx**

**S:Miss Lovato?xxx**

**M:Yeah xxx**

**S:Oh my god no!xxx**

**M:Why?xxx**

**S:She gave me a detention tonight just because I said that she was cheery and it pissed me the fuck off!xxx**

**M:Oh. Well dare I say it?xxx**

**S:Say what?xxx**

**M:Sounded like you deserved it…xxx**

**S:Miles I did not!xxx**

**M:Hi Selena. It's Miss Lovato. Tut tut for disrupting children in their lessons. Speaking of lessons why aren't you in one?**

**S:You took Miles' phone? And I got kicked out.**

**M:Oh badass:L Well looks like that is gonna add to your time tonight. I got an email off Mr Friles, he's added an hour and I would like an explanation as to why you were texting.**

**S:So Miley gets a detention too?**

**M:Nope.**

**S:Yeah so that's fair…**

**M:Miley was sticking up for me, so I like her. I'm going now. Cya tonight:)**

Oh my god! If I didn't have a crush on her I would probably hate her right now.

Taylor walked out of the classroom and sat beside me.

"What's up?"

"My detention is even longer now."

"Because of Friles?"

"Yeah and because I was texting Miles and she was in Miss Lovato's class and then she got caught."

"So you are in more trouble."

"Yeah!"

"Aww. Well at least it's break now, you wanna go get Miley?"

"Yeah."

**BREAK**

We walked round to Miss Lovato's room and saw Miley waiting for us like she did every Monday. She engulfed me in a hug.

"Hey babes sorry about the whole longer detention thing."

"It's okay. Did she just take your phone?"

"Yeah. And read out the convo to like the whole class."

"Oh my fucking god the bitch"

"Mmm…"

"You still like her don't you?"

"Yeah I guess sorry."

"Whatever. It's cool that you'd choose her over me."

"Selena."

I have deeper feelings than friendship for Miley, but I just can't figure it out. I don't think she knows and I don't want her to. It's confusing, and I don't know if I like her. But it definitely hurt to know she wasn't backing me.

I ran off and went in the toilets. I could hear Miley chasing after me but I didn't want to speak to her. I locked myself in a cubicle and just completely let go.

"Selena, are you crying?"

"Go away."

"Sel, I'm not leaving until you come out and tell me what's up."

I heard her lock the door and I knew that she meant it.

"Come on out and you can tell me what's wrong."

I unlocked the door and slowly left the cubicle.

"Now, what's up?"

"I don't know."

Tears poured down my face and Miley just grabbed me and hugged me so tight.

"Please tell me."

"I think…"

"What? What do you think?"

"I think I like you."

I couldn't believe that I'd actually said it out loud. I panicked and went to run for the door when I felt her hand on my arm pulling me back. She spun me round and suddenly her lips where on mine. I was actually kissing Miley Cyrus! It was soft, sweet and slow. I got into it and soon she slipped her tongue into my mouth. It was the best kiss I'd ever had and soon my suspicions were confirmed. I like girls.

"What? What was that."

"That was me helping you out Sel."

"How? Why?"

"You're my best friend Selena. That's all but I'm here for you. Nothing you tell me could ever make me think less of you, okay? I know that you've been worried and curious about your sexuality recently and so I was helping."

"How were you helping?"

"Well that was a nice kiss for me but it didn't feel amazing and that's cause I like guys. The question is, how did it feel for you?"

"It felt amazing. Like the best kiss ever."

"So you're a lesbian?"

"I think so."

"And you know what? That's cool with me. So do you like me?"

"Yeah I think so but not like love. Just I like you a little."

"Okay, well I have a proposition for you."

"What sort of proposition?"

"Well, I wanna experiment with girls and see how it is, and you're into girls, so how about we try out this whole friends with benefits thing?"

"Are you for real?"

"Well yeah but only if you want to?"

"Umm… yeah sure why not."

As soon as I'd got my answer out Miley had me pinned up against the wall and was roughly kissing me. I can't say that I wasn't enjoying it, because I was. It all ended too quick for my liking though. The bell went off so Miley pulled away.

"Can't be late again."

She smirked at me, slapped my ass and walked out.

"See ya later babe."

"Yeah see ya."

This day just kept getting weirder and weirder. And because of my little make out session with Miley I was late to Music. Luckily Miss Thorton loves me.

**3****RD**** LESSON (MUSIC)**

"Sel, late again?"

"Yeah I'm sorry Miss T."

"What were you doing?"

"Umm… Just going to the toilet."

"Really?"

"Yeah, sure I was."

"Okay. Well I was talking to Miss Lovato and it seems you've been a right bitch today."

"Does everyone like this woman?"

"Yes Selena, because she's a nice person."

"Yeah, yeah."

"You've always been nice to me and good in my lessons so why not for other teachers?"

"You are cool. They are not. I like this lesson. I don't like others."

"But you can't act like that, it's not okay."

"I can't just change myself. I don't like people but that's just how I am."

"I don't care. You have to start behaving."

"I'll try, but I doubt it."

"SELENA?"

"Okay okay, now what do I do?"

"Work by yourself today, that's what you do best."

"Alrightyoo."

"Write and compose a song ready to perform next lesson."

"Piece of cake."

"Okay then, get started."

I grabbed a guitar from off the rack and went and sat in a corner. It didn't take long for the words to start flowing and soon I already had verse:

It's the boy you never told I like you,

It's the girl you let get away,

It's the one you saw that day on the train but you freaked out and walked away,

It's the plane you wanna catch to vegas,

Things you swear you'll do before you die,

It's the city of love that waits for you,

But you're too damn scared to fly.

That's all that I had so far. I wasn't really sure what it was about but I think it just had a dancy vibe to it, you know? Something that people should get up to and just let loose. I couldn't do a love song because then I'd have to do it about a dude and it just wouldn't be true. My songs always have to be true.

"Selena, we're packing up now, how much have you done?" Miss Thorton asked.

"Umm… Just the first verse."

"Okay, well finish it for homework?"

"Yeah, sure thing." I agreed.

"See ya, and be good."

"I'll try." I joked.

Miss Thorton laughed at me and then I went out to find Taylor.

"Selena, what was up with you at break?"

"Oh it doesn't matter, I just felt sick."

"Oh. are you okay now?" Taylor questioned.

"Yeah I'm good."

"Well where did you and Miley disappear too?"

"I went to the toilet and she just stayed with me encase I was sick. You know how much I hate that."

"Yeah, well I'm glad you're good now."

"Thanks."

**LUNCH**

"Well what do you want to do for lunch?"

"Umm I'm not sure; we should just go find Miley."

"Oh speaking of the devil, here she comes."

Miley approached us both with a very mischievous look on her face.

"Oh my god guys, look what I managed to get off David!" Miley boasted.

She opened her bag to show us the content. Inside were several small bottles of various shots.

"Miley! If you get caught with that booze you are dead, and if we join in then we're dead!" Taylor exclaimed.

"Live a little Tay! We drinking it now Miles?" I asked.

"Yeah if you're up for it."

"Definitely."

"You coming Taylor?" Miley always tried to include her.

"No, I'm good."

"Kay, see ya."

Me and Miley went outside and sat beneath the tree just like me and Tay did before school. It was the perfect place to hang because no one ever went there.

"I'm gonna get so smashed Miles!"

"I know babes, so am I."

I went to grab one of the shots before Miley grabbed my hand.

"Oh no. Before you can have a drink, I get a little lip action."

She wiggled her eyebrows and just sat there smirking at me.

"Sure thing, sexy."

Miley is a beautiful girl I wasn't going to argue. I grabbed her face with both my hands and smashed our lips together.

"Now, give me my drink?"

"Here you go."

She handed me the drink and pecked my lips quickly.

Lunch was nearly over and I don't know how many drinks I'd had but let's just say the whole area had been spinning quite a while.

"Miley I want another."

"Yeah you know what yooooou have to doooo."

"I'm gonna kiss youuu."

"Cooome at meeee brooo!"

Our words were completely slurred but we understood. I literally pounced on Miley slammed her to the ground and straddled her. My lips were on hers immediately and we fought for dominance. It got quite heated; we were so drunk that we didn't care where we were. I began to lower my kisses so that I was kissing and nipping all over her neck. I quickly found her pulse point and just sucked, her moan radiated, turning me on so bad. Miley's top came off next and I continued even further down her body to her boobs. I was kissing and licking all down the valley between them and nipping at flesh not covered by the bra. She had just taken my top off when we were distracted by a loud clearing of someone's throat. We looked up and saw Miss Lovato standing infront of us with her arms crossed. I guess she heard Miley's moans; we were right behind her classroom.

"Well this is something I did not expect." Miss Lovato announced.

We both jumped apart and grabbed for our tops, quickly dressing.

"I caaaaaaan explaiiin." Miley started.

"Miley are you drunk?"

She just laughed and signalled that maybe she was drunk just a little.

"Selena, are you drunk as well?"

"Jusssst aa litlllle prettyy laaddy."

"Oh my god Selena."

"Youuuu arree soo sexxyy! Isn'tt she Miles?"

"Yeahhhh."

Miley went to kiss Selena again but Miss Lovato pried them apart.

"I don't think so! Selena get the bottles and put them all in your bag now!"

I picked up all the bottles, and as carefully as a completely smashed girl could, I put them in my bag.

"You girls could be in so much trouble."

We just laughed, we were so pissed off our heads that we didn't care.

"I reeeally likeke youuu misssss."

"Selena, be quite now!"

"Kisss me annnnd I will."

"Selena stop!"

**MISS LOVATO'S POV**

I have to admit, I wanted to kiss Selena so bad. I had done since I heard her call me fucking annoying this morning, but I knew that I couldn't.

I took them both back to my room as I had a free period.

"Alright Selena you sit there and Miley you can sit over there."

I kept them separated as I didn't want them to start making out again. I sent an email to the head telling him that I was keeping the two girls out of next lesson so I could sort out an 'argument' between the two.

"Alright girls now you can have this lesson to sober up and then you're going to class!"

I gave them both a glass of water, taking Selena's bag in the process and went back to my desk. I put all of the bottles into my bag ready to dispose of when I got home. I couldn't risk putting them in the bin here encase I got caught. I still found it hard to believe that I just saw Selena making out with a girl! I'm pretty sure that if I hadn't gone out and stopped them, they would have done a lot more than making out. I couldn't seem to shift the image of Selena on top of Miley both in just their bras. It's more Selena than Miley. Don't get me wrong they're both beautiful but Selena, there's just something about her.

"Miss I am so sorry. Are we going to get in shit for this? It's just my parents will kill me."

"Well you sobered up fast."

"I always have done, I'm so used to drinking now."

"Well I would advise not to drink, at this age, anymore please? Especially in school!"

"I promise I will never drink alcohol in school again!"

"Okay Miley. Take this note and go to your next lesson."

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, be careful sweetie and not again!"

"I promise!"

Miley took the note and then she left not so much as glancing at Selena.

"So Selena." Miss Lovato began.

"What."

"Someone's a little moody?"

"Yeah well, I said some things and you interrupted some things."

"Would you have had sex with her out there?"

"I was drunk, I would have done anything."

"But people could have seen."

"I didn't care, I still don't, look can I go now?"

"Yeah whatever but we are talking about what just happened in your detention."

"I'll look forward to it."

Sarcasm was literally dripping from her words. I watched her go and then smiled with content. I think I am developing a thing for Selena Gomez. Only bad thing is she's my student, oh and she already has Miley.


	2. I don't care that you like princesses

**Selena's POV – 5****TH**** LESSON (HISTORY)**

There is only one lesson left but I have a two hour detention with Miss Lovato after that which I was both looking forward to and not at the same time.

"Where have you been?" Taylor asked as soon as I took my seat.

"Umm I had to sort out something with Miley in Miss Lovato's classroom."

"But you hate Miss Lovato?"

"Yeah."

"Tell me what's going on. You disappear with Miley at break, lunch and now lesson four as well?" Taylor demanded.

"Okay, break I was sick. Lunch we were getting pissed which we did invite you to and then Miss Lovato caught us. She gave us the benefit of the doubt and then kept us in her room to sober up."

"Oh my god!"

"Yeah… so detention is going to be awkward."

"Oh my god yeah I bet."

"So what lesson is this anyways?"

"You don't know what lesson you're in?" Taylor laughed.

"No I just followed you in here."

"We are in History."

"Ughh really?"

"Yes with Mrs Tyre."

"She hates me as well."

"Yeah Sel, practically all the teachers hate you."

"True."

"But why this one?"

"Well she's 45 and you told her, when we were doing the victorian times, that you didn't give a fuck and didn't want to hear about her life then, that is what diaries are for."

"Oh yeah, that was funny."

"She looked like she was going to cry."

"Oh well, she got over it."

"Selena Gomez!"

"Yes Miss?"

"Why are you talking?"

"Because I had to ask my friend something."

"Well you are in my lesson, what could be more important than history?"

"Umm… Just about anything?"

"What were you talking about?"

"Paint drying."

"You are being very rude."

"Sue me."

"Get out now!"

"It would be my pleasure. You are going to make me fall to sleep and I have a detention after this."

I left the room and just sat on the floor by the door. It was only five minutes till the bell so I figured I'd just wait for Taylor so I could say goodbye, and then go to the detention.

"Selena, you just can't help yourself can you?"

Taylor shook me from my daze and I noticed that the class had been dismissed.

"Nope, I can't."

She rolled her eyes at me and smiled.

"Come on, I'll walk you to detention."

"Thanks."

We got to Miss Lovato's room soon enough and Taylor left to go home. I walked in and she was sitting at her desk.

**DETENTION**

"Oh hey Sel." Miss Lovato greeted.

"Hi."

She got up and sat at one of the student desks.

"Come and sit here."

I sat opposite her and waited for the awkward conversations to begin.

"Soooo….?" I began.

"What's going on with you Selena?"

"What do you mean? I've always been like this."

"Yeah but why?"

"Because that's just how I am. I get a kick out of harassing teachers and pissing them off."

"Well it's not going to work with me."

"I think it will."

"Look, I like you. I don't know why because you're a bitch, but I do. Don't make me regret it."

"You're going to end up regretting it anyway. All teachers do. You shouldn't bother."

"Yeah well I'm still going to."

"I don't get why you care."

"Because I'm your teacher and there's just something that I like about you. I know deep down that you're a good girl but you just have to try."

"I can't though. I'm only ever nice to people I'm close with."

"Well you can be close with me."

"Nah. Cause you're a teacher, if I come to you with a problem then you have to tell the head teacher."

"What happened at lunch? You got drunk! And I covered for you."

"Yeah but you can't keep doing that. I don't want you to get in trouble."

"See, you do care. You just need someone to help you."

"Yeah but none of the teachers care, they just brush me aside."

"Well starting from now I will help you. Think of me as your mentor. Whenever you have a problem, you come to me."

"You'd do that for me?"

"Yes, because like I said I do care. I'll run it by Mr Lake and talk to you tomorrow."

"Thanks miss! I really do appreciate it. I'll try to be nicer to you."

"You better and all!"

We both started laughing and then it settled in a comfortable silence. Until she brought up Miley.

"So what was that with Miley?"

"Do you really not know what we were doing? You must be so un-experienced."

I managed to make her smile and damn was it beautiful.

"Ha ha, I meant like are you two together?"

"Oh no. Miley is as straight as a pencil."

"You can get bendy pencils."

"Yes but Miley isn't a bendy pencil."

"Well then just what were you two doing then?"

"It's complicated."

"I have time."

"I thought that I was a lesbian. So at break today Miley kissed me so I could tell."

"And what did it tell you?"

"It told me that kissing Miley was better than kissing Ryan, Justin, Ethan, Michael, Riley and Marley."

"You kissed all those boys? All from our form?"

"Yeah. I was trying to prove to myself that I wasn't a dyke."

"But now you know you are?"

"Yes. And Miley has always wanted to experiment with a girl so we are sort of friends with benefits."

"Okay, but why don't you want anyone knowing that you're a lesbian?"

"Because. I've always been the bully not the bullied. If everyone found out about this then they'd rip the fuck out of me."

"Yeah but you can't keep it a secret forever."

"Yes I can. And I will. At least till I leave school."

"Fine but just so you know I think that's a terrible idea, but if it's what you want then okay, and also I'm here if you ever need to talk."

"Thanks, I will remember that. Oh and can you forget anything I said while I was drunk please?"

"What like saying that I was sexy and asking me to kiss you?"

"Miss!"

"Okay, I shall drop it."

"Good! It's so embarrassing. And I can't believe that you saw me in my bra."

"Don't be embarrassed it's all good and you have a nice body."

She winked at me and I was literally gob smacked, was she flirting?

"Excuse me?"

"Just take the compliment! . .Body."

"You're making me blush."

"Aww Selenalenalena is getting shy."

"Stop."

"I happen to think it's cute."

"Well you're not so bad yourself."

I was getting increasingly worked up. My crush for my teacher had already escalated and I only met her this morning.

"But on a serious note. Don't you think it was a bit stupid to do that at school?"

"Which bit?"

"All of it! The drinking, the topless making out and the ravishing of necks."

"We were not ravishing our necks and we were not topless!"

"Fine you had bras on and excuse me? Have you seen Miley's neck?"

I hadn't actually seen it but I do know that I gave her quite a few hicky's.

"No…"

"Oh. That explains it then."

"Is it that bad?"

"Oh yeaah!"

"SHIT!"

I continuously banged my head off the desk, I was so frustrated at this point.

"Would you quit that?"

"Oh my gosh I'm so screwed."

"Why?"

"Because Taylor already thinks something is going on and now she's gonna see Miley and she will know."

"She won't know it was you though. Just chill."

"Oh, yeah I guess. She can just say she hooked up with a random guy."

"Yeah. Now tell me about your deal with Friles and Tyre."

"Omg! Tyre snitched on me as well?"

"Yes, now tell me."

"It's just because I hate English and History."

"Do you hate it? Or do you just not understand it?"

"Isn't that the same thing?"

"Nope. If you hate something then you just don't like it but if you don't understand it then you can't do it and you're forced to not like it."

"Oh well I guess the second one."

"See! So if you tried harder, it would be much easier for you."

"Yeah, maybe."

"We are definitely talking about your lesson behaviour tomorrow in form."

"Oh joy!"

She gave me a disapproving look and I soon stopped, not wanting to annoy her.

"So why were you teasing Mr Friles about fancying me? Is it so hard to believe that someone could like me?"

"No! Definitely not."

I hoped that she would understand the double meaning, that I was aiming at the fact that I liked her, and I think she did because she smiled.

"So why the teasing?" She asked.

"Because I know it pisses him off."

"You can be a bitch, you know that?"

"Yes I do."

We just sat there talking about random stuff for the last remaining hour and then Miss Lovato allowed me to leave.

"See ya tomorrow Sel, behave."

"See ya tomorrow."

I waved goodbye and then left to go home.

**HOME**

As soon as I got into the house my little brother Max ran up to me and jumped into my arms. Max was the cutest thing ever. He's only four but we are so close, way closer than we are to our older brother Justin.

"Hey Maximillions!"

"Hey Lena!"

"How was your day buddy?"

"It was good, why are you late?"

"I had detention."

"Again?"

I couldn't help but laugh at his shocked face, he was too cute sometimes.

"Yes, again. Where is mommy?"

"She's gone to bed. She was feeling poorly."

"Daddy?"

"He's watching telly."

"Justin?"

"He's in his room working on something sciencey"

"Oh lord."

I walked into the lounge room with Max cuddled into my arms.

"Hey dad, I'm going to get Max washed and ready for bed?"

"Kay."

I took Max upstairs and gave him a quick bath. Whenever he had a bath he had to have bubbles and his famous army of ducks.

He was in bed and I had just finished reading to him when he began to ask me a question.

"Selena?"

"Yes buddy?"

"You know that secret you told me? That I can't tell anyone?"

"Yeah."

"Well I have a question about it."

"Okay shoot!"

I told Max that I thought I was a lesbian. I don't know why because he is only four. I just felt like I had to tell someone. He's my family so I just wondered what he'd think and besides I knew I could trust him.

"Why do all the princesses in the story books have a prince but you have another princess?"

"Because some princesses want princes. It depends on who you like. Some princesses like princes, some like other princesses and some like both. Some princes like princesses, some like other princes and some like both. Do you understand?"

"Yeah I think I do. And Selena?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't care that you like princesses! I still love you!"

"I love you too Max, night!"

"Night."

He nearly made me cry in there bless him. He's only four and yet he understands so much!

By the time I had him ready for bed and tucked in it was eight and I was tired myself. So I headed to bed.

**END OF MONDAY**

A/N Thanks for reading. Please review


	3. Lo que soy

**TUESDAY – AT HOME**

I was woken up by Max at about seven. He walked into my room crying.

"Max what's up?"

He jumped on my bed and cuddled up to me.

"Mommy and Daddy had a big argument and then Mommy shouted at me."

That's the thing I hate about my family. My mother is a terrible parent. She is forever getting drunk or just staying in her room, she doesn't give a damn about any of us. My dad is way more interested in his football games or his work. Justin is going to be eighteen in two weeks and then he's going away. He doesn't give a damn about me or Max either, he just cares about his education. I was the only one that cared for Max. I had to give him breakfast, pack his lunch, help him dress, take him to school. Sometimes dad did him dinner but only rarely.

"What happened this time?"

"Daddy called Mommy some bad words. She said she wanted a divorce and he hit her. She started crying and then he went out. I went to see if she was okay but she just yelled at me."

Dad always hit mom. I knew it wasn't right but I didn't care. My main priority was to look after Max. She didn't deserve my concern and besides she gives as good as she gets.

"Aww I'm sorry bud, are you okay now?"

"Yes but then I saw Justin and he told me that I was just making it worse."

"You weren't though. Don't listen to him."

"I just don't understand, no one loves me."

He started crying even more. I felt so sorry for him, no four year old should have to feel that way.

"You have me Maxy. I love you so so so much."

"I love you too Lena!"

I gave him the biggest hug that I could muster up and then began to tickle him. His cute face lit up and it was beautiful.

I stood up and turned around bending my back so that he could hop on.

"Alright then Mister! Time to get you dressed."

I ran to his room, darting left and right, making rocket noises. He always loved it when I did that and I just wanted to make him smile. As soon as we got to his room I put him down on his bed.

"Okay, you get dressed. Do you need me help?"

"No I'm a big boy now."

"I know you are bud."

I gave him a smile and he smiled back.

"I'll go get your breckie ready. Come down when you're done."

I left his room and then went to my moms. I didn't bother to knock I just went straight in.

"I'll get Max from school today."

"Well good because I am not getting the brat."

"Max is not a brat! You stupid bitch."

"Do not talk to your mother that way!"

"Yeah my mother," I scoffed "You haven't been my mother for a while."

I walked out leaving her to lie in self-pity.

I got Max's favourite cereal ready. Coco Pops. And then I went to get mine.

Max came running down the steps dressed in his cute t-shirt with a hood and some three-quarter lengthed jeans.

"Yay! My favourite!"

He sat down at the table and I joined him.

"Okay so after breakfast we need to go and get our teeth brushed and then I have to get dressed." I started.

"And then we both have to get our bags ready for the day and you will do our lunch." Max finished.

We had both got so used to doing stuff for ourselves that we were both set on our routine.

"That's right Maximilions."

We quickly finished the cereal and then headed upstairs to finish getting ready.

It was about half eight when we were both ready to leave.

"Okay Max. Do you have your reading log?"

"Check."

"Your reading book?"

"Check."

"Your lunch?"

"Check."

"So your all set."

"Yes. Now Lena, do you have your diary?"

"Check."

"Your books for today's lessons?"

"Check."

"Your pencil case?"

"Check."

"Your lunch?"

"Check."

"Then we are ready to go."

Max could be so adorable sometimes. On the walk to his school we just spoke about random things. Me making sure that Max was okay and that he'd stay happy today.

We arrived at his school and I gave him a hug.

"Have a good day."

"I will"

"See you tonight."

"Bye."

I gave him a kiss on the cheek and then set off in the direction of my school. It was only a five minute walk so I got there at about quarter to nine.

**AT SCHOOL**

When I walked into form I realised that I was one of the first for once.

"Ohh Selena, one of the first in. Is this a sign of the new you?"

"It's just luck miss."

I gave her a mocking smile and she just rolled her eyes.

"Yeah yeah, okay. Get a chair and sit by me. We need to discuss your new mentor-ey thingy."

"Mentor-ey thingy? It sounds so official."

"Shut up and get a chair."

"Yes sir."

I laughed and then got a chair and placed it beside Miss Lovato.

"So I spoke to Mr Lake."

"What did he say?"

"That he thought it was a brilliant idea."

"He did?"

To be honest I thought he'd poo-poo the idea straight away.

"Yes he did. More people care then you think."

"Okay. Whatever you say."

I smiled at her though to show that I appreciated it and she smiled back.

"So what you're like my mentor now?"

"Yep."

"How does that work?"

"Okay, well basically you will be given a report. This will be handed in to the teacher at the start of every lesson. They will give you a rating of either; cause for concern, satisfactory, good or excellent. Your aim is to get excellents. You can gain points this way and it will be a lot easier."

"This sounds like a lot of work!"

"It will be, but I know that you can do it."

"What if I can't? What if it's too hard and I let you down?"

"You won't. You'll have a time out card so if any of the lessons or teachers or even students are getting too hard to bear you just use the card and come straight here."

"What to you?"

"Yes. I am here to talk to before school, after school, lunch, break and during lessons if you use the card. If you have any problems you have to come to me and I will solve them."

"I get a lot of problems though Miss. Are you sure you won't get annoyed?"

"I'm sure because I want to help you."

"Okay then, I'll try but it may take a while."

"I know."

"Well thanks Miss."

"It's no problem."

By the time we were finished speaking everyone else had already come in and I went to sit next to Taylor.

"What was that all about?" Taylor asked.

"Just Miss Lovato helping me out." I expained.

"So you like her now?"

"Yeah she's alright I guess."

"What changed your mind?"

"Nothing really. She just talked to me about things in detention yesterday and now she's gonna help me."

I folded up my report and put it in my bag.

"What was that?"

"My report?"

"Your report? What's that?"

"Just something used to basically monitor my behaviour and shit."

"And you're willing to use that?"

"Dunno, probably not today because I know we have Mrs Tyre today."

"And you hate her?"

"Yes I do."

"What about Mr Rayle? We have him first?"

"I hate him as well!"

"We started a big assessment worth most of our grade yesterday. He'll probably pair you and Miley together since you both missed it and are at the same stage."

"Yeah probably."

I didn't really want to be paired with Miley. We hadn't spoken since the whole drunk thing yesterday and I wasn't ready to discuss it now.

The rest of tutor was relatively boring. Miss Lovato did the register, Taylor discussed some sort of hook up she'd had and then it was time for biology with Mr Rayle.

"Selena come here a sec."

Taylor walked out with all the other students and signalled that she was going to wait for me.

"Yes Miss."

"Come back at Lunch to show me what sort of morning you have."

"Okay, will do."

"Don't want you to have to get another detention."

She smirked at me and I just walked out.

"What did she say?"

"Just telling me a load of shit about showing her my report at lunch."

"You going to?"

"Yeah probably."

We carried on talking about her hook up on the way to biology. I didn't think I'd ever be glad to get there but her story was pissing me off. My gladness though was short lived.

**1****ST ****LESSON (BIOLOGY)**

I walked in and Mr Rayle beckoned me over.

"Selena you missed last lesson, so I shall pair you with Miley. The only spare desk is the one right at the back. You two will sit there. The assignment is on the board, start as soon as she arrives."

"Yes sir."

I walked to the back and just as I sat down, I saw Miley arrive. She was called over and presumably given the same talk I was because she came and sat beside me.

"Miley about yesterday…"

I was going to talk to her about it but she cut me off.

"It was stupid, yeah I know."

"Yeah because we shouldn't do that out in the open."

"No! We shouldn't do it at all."

"It was your suggestion."

"Yeah and it was wrong. I am not a dyke."

"Fine."

"I do not do that!"

"Thanks. Carry on talking about it like you did something so disgusting!"

"I did! Don't you get it? If anyone saw us I would have been the laughing stock of school."

"You're a real bitch, you know that?"

"ME?"

"Yeah you! I thought you were my friend."

"I am but I can't do that."

"I don't give a shit whether you do that or not! You suggested it anyway."

"Then why are you calling me a bitch?"

"Because you're sat there talking about how wrong and disgusting it is to be a lesbian and I'm sitting right in front of you."

"I didn't think of it like that."

"Oh really?"

"I didn't mean it!"

"So you don't think it's disgusting?"

"No I do. I just didn't mean to offend you."

"Well it's a little late."

"Yeah. I think we shouldn't be friends anymore."

"Fine. Whatever."

I wasn't going to stay around so I got up and headed for the door.

"I just got an email Selena. I need your report card."

I completely ignored him and carried on for the door.

"Selena?"

By the time I was out the door tears were pouring down my face. I ran outside and spotted Steven. Steven was the crack head at school. Most girls stayed away from him because they knew he was bad news so he hardly ever had a girlfriend. As soon as he spotted me he started walking towards me.

"Hey Selena."

"Hi, you got any weed?"

I knew that it would be stupid to smoke weed but right now I just wanted to get high and forget it all.

"Yeah, you want some?"

"Definitely."

"Twenty-five quid."

"I don't have any money."

"Well that's too bad."

He began to walk away when I grabbed his arm.

"Wait! Is there anything else I can do?"

I asked trailing my hands down from his shoulder, past his chest resting on his crotch.

"How far you willing to go baby?"

"If I give you head? Will you give me a joint?"

"It's a deal."

I grabbed his hand and led him to the top of the field and behind the big oak tree. I was sort of nervous but I wanted that weed! I got down on my knees and began to undo his belt.

**MISS LOVATO'S POV**

I was in the classroom teaching my class when I looked out the window and spotted Selena. She was with a boy who I didn't recognise and she looked desperate. I saw her take his hand and walk away. I wanted to know why she wasn't in lesson, and I wanted to know what she was doing.

"Okay class, I just have to pop out I'll be right back."

It was a sixth form class so I knew they could be trusted to behave.

I left the classroom and followed in the direction that I saw her walk off. As I came closer I could tell that someone was behind the tree. I couldn't believe my eyes. Selena was on her knees with the boy's penis in her mouth. She looked like she was swallowing and then she wiped her mouth. She stood up, taking what appeared to be a joint out of his mouth in the process and put it into her own awaiting mouth. I couldn't stand and watch any longer I marched up to the two.

"What the fuck do you think you are doing Selena?"

She was obviously shocked to see me. She immediately dropped the joint and stamped on it. The boy tried to run but I grabbed him.

"I don't think so. And if you wouldn't mind, could you put your dick away?"

He quickly did so; it was evident that he was embarrassed. His face had turned a bright shade of pink.

"What is your name?"

"Steven Jones."

"Well Steven go to your class now! You will be hearing from me! And if you don't go back to class I will know. And you will be in deep shit."

He nodded his head and ran off. I turned to Selena and shook my head.

"Did I really just catch you doing that?"

"Yep."

I was so furious right now. I grabbed her arm and forced her to walk with me. I knew that I had to go back to my class. As soon as I arrived outside my room I turned to Selena.

"Wait here!"

I walked into the room and they looked up at me.

"I'm sorry I was so long guys, you have five minutes left of this lesson, is it okay if I just sort something out?"

They could tell I was pissed, it was obvious. They just looked at me sympathetically and nodded their heads to say that it was fine.

"Thankyou."

I walked back out and carried on taking to Selena.

"Why Sel?"

"Because I felt like it."

"Yeah because that's a brilliant excuse!"

"Well what can I say?"

"Stop it!"

"Stop what?"

"Acting like you don't care. I know that you do. There must be a reason that you did that but you won't tell me."

"Because it's none of your fucking business." She yelled.

"Don't swear at me! I will lose my patience and I WILL tell Mr Lake what I just saw."

She stayed silent after that.

"Give me your report."

She took it out of her bag and handed it to me. I went into the classroom to fill it in and then returned it to her.

"Here. You got a cause for concern. And a detention after school. You're lucky that that's all I'm giving you. Don't bother coming back at lunch."

**SELENA'S POV**

I walked off and to be honest I felt terrible. I let her down and she didn't deserve it. I even let myself down. I shouldn't have done that, giving him a blowjob was the most disgusting thing I have ever done. And smoking a bit of that spliff has made me feel sick. And I knew that she was going to be even more pissed when I didn't turn up to the detention but I had to get Max from school.

I walked to Biology and stood outside waiting for Taylor. Miley passed me and I just completely ignored her.

"Selena! What happened? Why did you walk out?" Taylor asked.

"I just felt sick that's all Taylor."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah."

"Why didn't you just tell him?"

"Because I felt like I was going to be sick so I didn't want to wait."

"Oh alright. Are you sure you're okay? You've been sick a lot lately. Are you pregnant?"

She started laughing. I know that she was just trying to make me smile but I wasn't in the mood. I pretended to laugh a long with her though because I didn't want her questioning me.

"Ha ha so funny."

"I do try."

"What lesson do we have next?"

"That would be History."

"Oh great! Mrs Tyre here we come."

**2****ND**** LESSON – HISTORY**

I wasn't going to bother trying in any lessons today. I was not in the mood at all. I was going to be quiet and stay out of the way but if a teacher starts on me then that's their fault not mine.

As soon as I got into History I handed her my report, sat down, got my rough book out and started writing. I was working on my song that I started in English. The last line I had wrote was:

The city of love that waits for you but your too damn scared to fly.

I sat there and just thought about what I wanted the song to include. A big beat, nice lyrics and after numerous attempts I had figured out the start of the chorus:

_Hit the lights let the music move you,_

_Lose yourself tonight._

I was just about to continue writing when Mrs Tyre called my name.

"Selena!"

I looked up.

"Huh?"

"What are you doing?"

"Writing?"

"Why?"

"Because that's what I felt like doing."

"Give me the book."

"No, it's private."

"Selena give me the book or leave my classroom."

I got up and walked towards her I think she thought that I was giving her the book but she was mistaken.

"Fine I need my report."

She glared at me but gave me the report nonetheless. I took my bag and walked out of the classroom. She had given me a cause for concern and detention. Now that Miss Lovato is my mentor all my detentions are with her. So I guess she would add it to the detention that I wasn't going to after school.

I realised that I had forty-five minutes of lesson two left so I went out to the spot by the tree and carried on with my song:

_Come alive let the moment take you,_

_Lose control tonight._

I wasn't sure what to write after that? I decided that what I had as the chorus so far should be repeated.

The song would have love aspects in it but it wasn't a love song. I thought of a few more lines so I decided to write them down and then go back to History to meet Taylor.

_It's the time that you totally screwed up,_

_Still you're trying to get it out your brain,_

_It's the fight you had when you didn't make up,_

_The past that you're dying to change._

I closed my rough book and put it away. I glanced at my report and felt horrible. I didn't want to let Miss Lovato down but then at the same time I really wasn't in the mood today especially after what happened with Miley.

By the time I got outside History there was only like a minute till the bell and soon enough Taylor was coming out and standing beside me.

**BREAK**

"Hey Tay."

"Hey Sel."

"How was History?"

"It was fine but Selena, you need to stop this."

"I'll maybe try tomorrow but right now I'm not in a good mood and I don't want to be here."

"Okay but I'm going to make sure you do. I'm your friend and I won't let you fail."

"Thanks Taylor, so where do you want to go for break?"

"Umm… Can we go outside and relax? It's sunny?"

"Yeah sure."

Once we were outside and had found a nice spot we began to talk again.

"So your report must look really bad right now."

"Yeah. I have two cause for concerns and two detentions."

"Tonight with Miss Lovato?"

"Yeah."

"You gonna go?"

"No."

"Why?" Taylor asked.

"I have to fetch Maxy from school."

"Can't your mom do it?"

"No. She's busy."

"Oh, well Miss Lovato is gonna be so pissed off at you."

"Yep she is."

"So what were you doing after you got sent out just?"

"I came out here and worked on my song for Music."

"Yay! You haven't wrote a song in ages!"

"I know yeah. I quite like it though. You know? Writing again"

"You were always your happiest when you wrote."

"I might start it again."

"Good."

"Yeah."

"So what happened with you and Miley?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well I didn't want to say anything but Stacey's partner wasn't here today, so Mr Rayle let Stacey go with Miley."

"Yeah?"

"And let's just say Miley wasn't being nice about you."

"Oh joy! What did she say."

"She just said that you were a bitch and a fucking slag. Stacey was agreeing with her and they were just generally taking the piss out of you."

"Oh well. It's just pathetic."

"So what happened?"

"Nothing really. We just argued."

"About?"

"She just blames me for getting caught."

"But you're not even in any trouble."

"I know that's why it's pathetic."

Me and Taylor just spent the rest of break talking about how stupid Miley was and how Taylor would always stick by me.

"Kay Sel. Break's over."

"Urgh. What lesson have we got next?"

"Spanish."

"Oh yay! I like Spanish."

"Yeah you do."

We got up and walked to the Spanish classroom.

I handed my report to Mr Ryan.

"Hola señor Ryan."

"Hola Selena."

Spanish is one of my favourite lessons aside from Music, I know a lot of Spanish because of my mom. When I was little she used to rarely speak English instead she would just speak Spanish.

Once everyone was in the lesson Mr Ryan began to explain the task.

"This aim of this lesson is to do a meaningful piece of writing. It can be about love, about life about anything you want. Any questions?"

I put my hand up.

"Yes Selena?"

"Could I do mine in the form of a song, please?"

"Yes of course, any more questions?"

No one put their hands up.

"Okay then get started."

I got my rough book out ready to write in and then turned to Taylor.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to write a letter about what I hope to accomplish in later life, what about you?"

"I'm going to write a song, I'm not sure what about yet."

"That's an awesome idea."

"Thanks."

I smiled and then turned back to my book. I wanted my song to mean something to me. Maybe have it about my sexuality but not like obviously. I want it to be like: This is Real, This is me. Something like that. It didn't take long and I already had four lines written down.

_Desde muy niña siempre actué_

_Con timidez_

_Con el miedo de decir_

_Todo de una vez_

That means that ever since I was young, I have been shy and I've been afraid to tell people what I have to say.

I continued brainstorming ideas for my song. I'm so used to writing them that the ideas literally just come to me, it's so easy.

_Tengo un sueño en mÍ,_

_Que brillanda está,_

_Lo dejaré salir,_

_Por fin tú sabrás._

That means that I have this dream inside of me and It's time to let it show and to let everyone know.

I wanted to get the chorus done before I had to leave so I racked my brain and I thought about it. I decided to use the 'This is Real' 'This is me' idea.

_Lo que soy, es real,_

_Soy exactamente la que debo ser hoy,_

_Deja que la luz, brille en mí,_

_Ahora sí, sé quién soy,_

_No hay manera de ocultar,_

_Lo que siempre he querido ser,_

_Lo que soy._

This means that I'm not going to hide who I am anymore. This is me and I'm going to let it show.

Technically my song wasn't true yet because I am hiding who I am. But this song is about courage as well and I will eventually tell everyone. But for now it's just making sure that I stay true to myself, that I admit it to myself. I am a lesbian.

Mr Ryan approached me.

"May I look at what you have so far please Selena?"

"Of course you can sir."

I gave him my book and he read through what I had written. He handed me the book back with a smile on his face.

"That's an amazing start."

"Thank you."

"Would you like to perform to the class, what you have so far I mean."

"Umm… I guess so."

"Okay, one second."

Mr Ryan went to the front of the classroom and got everybody's attention.

"Okay guys, Selena is going to perform what she has of her song so far."

Everyone cheered, they were all curious to see if I could sing.

"Okay Selena come down here then."

I walked to the front of the classroom, took a deep breath and began.

"Desde muy niña siempre actué

Con timidez

Con el miedo de decir

Todo de una vez

Tengo un sueño en mÍ,

Que brillanda está,

Lo dejaré salir,

Por fin tú sabrás.

Lo que soy, es real,

Soy exactamente la que debo ser hoy,

Deja que la luz, brille en mí,

Ahora sí, sé quién soy,

No hay manera de ocultar,

Lo que siempre he querido ser,

Lo que soy."

I finished the song and the whole class were clapping. I could hear random comments like 'wow she was good' or 'I didn't expect that.' I smiled and went back to sit by Taylor.

"That was so good Sel."

"Thanks."

"Okay then class you are dismissed, Selena come and get your report card." Mr Ryan announced.

I walked up to Mr Ryan and took the report thanking him for the great lesson at the same time.

"What did you get Sel?"

I opened the card and looked it. As soon as I saw it my face lit up.

"I got an excellent, yay!"

"Well done Selena."

I hugged Taylor, clearly sharing my excitement. Unfortunately Stacey and Miley decided to ruin the moment.

"Careful I wouldn't touch it if I were you."

Miley started laughing at Stacey's comment.

"Fuck off Stacey, and you Miley. If I'd wanted your opinion on my friends I would have asked. But I don't remember asking so a-buh-bye." Taylor defended.

She grabbed my arm and started pulling me in the opposite direction, both of us laughing. We went outside and once again sat on the grass ready to relax.

**LUNCH**

"Those girls are so pathetic!"

"I know yeah, you totally owned them."

I did, didn't I?"

We both started laughing and then settled into a comfortable silence.

"So anyway, how are things at home?"

"Not good."

"What's happened?"

"My mom is still getting drunk every day and night, my dad's still not interested at all in us, my brother's still only focused on school. Max is the only decent person in my family and he's four."

"I'm so sorry babe. You shouldn't have to deal with that."

"Yeah. I just wish Justin would act like a brother for once. He is seventeen and nearly two years older than me, he's supposed to protect me and Max. He's leaving in two weeks and then it's just going to be me, Max, mom and dad. But I wouldn't be surprised if they fucked off aswell. They had another massive argument this morning which ended in my dad punching my mom and then leaving. So he probably won't be back tonight."

"So do you have to look after Max now then?"

"Yep. I have to feed, bathe, dress and entertain him."

"Isn't he in reception now though?"

"Yes. So he gets homework, just little things. And he's got to read this like really simple books. He is getting quite good at them though, I am so proud."

"Aww, so are you gonna like take him when you're eighteen?"

"Definetely. He's not staying with my parents, they don't want him and they don't deserve him."

"I can't believe them. How can they not want their own children?"

"I don't know, they're just screwed up and we're better off without them."

"Yeah, it sure sounds like it."

We just sat there on our phones playing games and just relaxing for the rest of lunch. I did text Miley but that didn't go to well:

**S:Why are you acting like this?**

**M:Fuck off.**

**S:I don't get you at all.**

**M:What we did was stupid.**

**S:Yeah but you suggested it.**

**M:Well I was wrong. I shouldn't have kissed you. And I shouldn't have got drunk with you. I'm not a lesbo.**

**S:Yeah kay… whatever. Be that way because you've fucking pissed me right off.**

**M:I don't give a fuck.**

Miley was acting like a right bitch now and it's pretty clear that we are no longer friends.

"Selena, the bell is about to go, we should start heading off to next lesson."

"Which is?"

"R.E"

"Oh joy, Miss Opal is okay but I just dislike the subject."


	4. Go fetch

**4****TH**** LESSON – R.E**

I walked with Taylor to the classroom and by the time we got there they were already letting us in, I gave Miss Opal my report and then took my seat next to Taylor.

"Okay Class, today we are discussing God. Who believes in God?"

About half of the class put their hands up, me and Taylor didn't.

"Okay well you lot go and stand on the left side of the room. Now, who doesn't know what they believe in?"

Again half put their hands up.

"Okay you go to the right of the room. So the remaining must not believe in god. You can stay in the middle."

In my group of non-believers there was me, Taylor, Jack, Rhys, Tyler, Sarah and oh my god! Steven. I didn't even think he was in our set!

"Taylor since when has Steven been in our group?"

"He moved, this is his first lesson."

I was completely pissed now.

"Okay class I want you to discuss with your group why you have chosen what you did."

As soon as Steven saw me he started to head towards us.

"Taylor he's coming!"

"So?"

"Hey Selena I had fun outside, we should do it another time." Steven flirted.

"What's he talking about Sel?" Taylor asked.

"Nothing Tay, just go away Steven."

"Aww, is someone ashamed of the slag they've become."

"Fuck off Steven!"

"What is he talking about Selena?" Taylor once again asked.

"Selena here gave me a blowjob for my spliff. That's how desperate the whore is."

I slapped Steven as hard as I could and ran out. Grabbing my report on the way. I didn't know what to do, I was crying really badly. It wasn't just the odd tear it was a full on sob fest. I ran to Miss Lovato's room, she was my mentor after all. I knocked on the door and waited for her reply.

**MISS LOVATO'S POV**

I had a free period so I wasn't actually teaching anyone. I heard the door knock and I called whoever it was in. I wasn't expecting Selena, I know I am supposed to be mad at her for all she's done but she was crying, like proper crying, and I couldn't bring myself to be mad.

"Oh my god, Selena. What's wrong?"

I grabbed her and pulled her into a hug, stroking her hair. I tried to soothe her and calm her down but it wasn't working. I just sat down with her in my arms and let her calm down. After about ten minutes the crying had subsided.

"Okay Sel, tell me what's wrong now."

"It's a really long story."

"I have time."

I gave her a reassuring smile and she began to speak.

"Well basically, in Science I got paired with Miley. She must have been spooked after you caught us because she was a right bitch towards me. She said how being a lesbian was disgusting and that she couldn't do it anymore. She just really got to me and I started believing her. I ran out and then went outside, that's when I saw Steven. He was smoking weed like he always does and I felt like maybe it would help me. So I asked him if I could have some and said that I didn't have money. He went to walk away and I thought I could kill two birds with one stone. I could get the weed and prove that I wasn't a lesbian. I went through with it but it made me feel physically sick. Then you caught us and I saw how disappointed you were and I felt like crap. I'd cheered up a bit but then Steven is now in my R.E. class. We ended up in the same group and he came up to me. He started saying that he enjoyed it and maybe we could do it again. Taylor was there and she kept asking what he was talking about. I panicked and tried to get him to go but then he said to Taylor that I gave him a blowjob for his weed and that's how desperate I am and he called me a whore. Now Taylor isn't going to speak to me and I am going to be so screwed."

She started crying again and I just held her close to me. I felt so bad for her, she hadn't meant for any of this to happen.

"Don't worry Selena. I'll talk to Steven, I'll make sure that he shuts up about this. As for Taylor just talk to her explain what happened. She will understand."

"Do you really think so?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Thanks Miss."

"It's no problem sweetie."

"Oh and do you think I could do the detention tomorrow? It's just that I have to fetch my brother from school?" I asked.

"Yeah that's fine but I'll have to add an extra half an hour on. So your detention for tomorrow is on for two and a half hours, okay?"

"Yes, okay. Thankyou."

"It's okay but why isn't your mom fetching your brother or your dad?"

"Oh they're at work."

"Oh okay, well you can stay in here till this lesson is over if you want. There's only ten minutes."

"Yes I would love that!"

"Thanks Miss."

"It's okay."

**SELENA'S POV**

"Miss, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Do you think I am a desperate whore?"

"No of course not! You were just confused and you made a mistake."

"Okay. I don't know why but I don't think I could handle it if you thought badly of me."

"Well it's a good job you're an amazing girl then isn't it?"

She winked at me and I swear to god she was flirting again.

"I am amazing, aren't I?"

"Just the most amazingist."

"Amazingist? Are you sure that's a word?" I teased.

"No… But it is now."

"So now you invent words as well. I do say."

"Yep, I'm a brilliant multi-tasker."

"Thank you." I beamed.

"For what?" I could tell she was confused.

"For just being there for me to make me smile."

"I'm your teacher that's what I'm here for."

"Oh okay."

I guess for a second I thought we were having a moment but she's just doing what she has to do.

"It's not just because you're my student," I guess she sensed my dismay. "It's because you're an amazing person and I can't stand to see you cry."

"That's so sweet."

"Well, I do try."

The bell went signaling the beginning of fifth lesson.

"Okay, well I'll see you tomorrow Miss."

"Yeah, see ya."

I walked out and headed to Geography. Luckily that was the only lesson I didn't have with Taylor. So I wouldn't have to face her.

**5****TH**** LESSON – GEOGRAPHY**

As soon as I walked in Mrs leavo beckoned me over.

"Yes Miss?"

"I have had an email from Miss Opal, about your report so I will fill that in for you."

"Okay then thanks."

I handed her the report card and went and sat at the back on my own like I always did. Geography was the only lesson I sat on my own and I kind of liked it. I could just relax and not have to worry about talking to a friend.

If I'm honest I didn't really do any work that lesson. I just sat and I relaxed. I thought about everything that has been going on lately. At home, at school and with my friends. I didn't know what would happen to me and Max if my mom and dad did leave. I wouldn't let us get taken away. No! I'd get a job, I'd make a life for us and we would get by somehow! I was pretty sure that that time was going to be upon us sooner or later.

When the lesson was eventually over I went up to Mrs Leavo to get my report.

She had given me a good which was fine considering I did no work. But Miss Opal gave me a cause for concern and apparently I was in trouble for slapping Steven, fuck that! Miss Lovato could deal with that tomorrow because right now I needed to go get Max.

**AFTER SCHOOL**

It took me five minutes to get to his school and then I went inside to collect him. He was staying at a special after school care programme. If he was only there until four or sooner it was free and I always got there to collect him at quarter to. Although tomorrow I knew that I would be late as I had a detention, so I had to find out how much it would cost. I went up to the woman who runs it to sign Max out and then asked her.

"Excuse me, how long do you open for?"

"We open until seven o'clock dear."

"Okay thank you, and how much does it cost if I were to keep him here until around half six maybe a bit sooner?"

"Anytime between six and seven costs £3."

"Okay, thankyou. Well I will not be fetching Max until around that time tomorrow, so when do I pay you?"

"You can just pay me when you collect him or you can keep it as a bill and pay it all each term."

"Oh okay thanks for the help bye." I smiled.

"Bye."

"Bye Max." The woman said.

I took Max's hand and began the walk back to the house.

"Why am I staying till then tomorrow Lena?"

"I have detention, buddy."

"Again?"

His face mirrored the expression he had made the day before.

"Yes, again. I'm sorry buddy you don't mind do you?"

"No, it's fine. I like it there."

"Good! Because I wouldn't make you go if you didn't want to."

I ruffled his hair and then we carried on the walk in silence. As soon as we got in the door I spotted that there was glass all in the kitchen and that my mom was lying on the floor drinking and crying.

"Go upstairs and get changed Max, don't come down until I say you can."

"Okay Lena."

Max went off and I approached my mother.

"What are you doing mom?"

"You're father left me for good. He's taken his stuff and he's gone."

"Yeah, so? What are you doing on the floor?"

"I am wallowing! I loved that man!"

"Yeah okay course you did."

"You're just a child, you wouldn't understand."

"Yeah well, you need to get up and go to bed. You can't stay on the floor."

I helped her to her room and got her in bed.

"I need three pound for tomorrow."

"Why?"

"Max has to go to after school club longer."

"I am not giving that kid any of my money."

"He's your child!"

"I don't give a fuck. None of you are my children anymore. I hate you all. Get out!"

I closed the door and left her I was so fucking pissed off.

I cleaned the floor, getting rid of all the glass I could find and cleaning up all the spillages. Then I went to find Justin.

"Justin look after Max while I'm gone. I won't be long."

"Yeah, kay."

I left Justin and went to get Max.

I found him in his room, in his pajamas and playing with his toys.

"Max buddy, I have to go out quickly, I won't be long. Justin is in his room if you need him, okay?"

"Yes Lena, bye."

I gave him a hug and then left. I was going to the café down the block from our house. My dad was gone and my mom wasn't going to give us any money so I would need my own. Max was going to need money for trips, for after school club and he needed to be treated every once in a while, he deserved it.

"Excuse me, do you have any jobs going?" I asked the owner.

"How old are you?"

"Sixteen?"

"Can you make a cup of coffee and tea?"

"Yes."

"Can you tidy tables?"

"Yes."

"Can you wash up?"

"Yes."

"Then you're hired, when can you start?"

"Thursday?"

"Yep that's fine. What hours can you do?"

"Three-fifty until six-fifty."

"A three hour shift, okay. That would give you four pound an hour. So if you work that shift every school day you can get sixty pounds a week."

"Oh my gosh! That's perfect, thank you so much."

"It's fine. I'll see you on Thursday."

The café had been looking for staff for a while now so I was lucky. I know that sixty quid isn't necessarily that much considering all I have to buy but it would do.

I was just outside the house when I panicked. I could hear coughing and I swear the kitchen looked smoky. I ran in and nearly had a heart attack. Max was stood near a pan which had caught on fire and he was coughing. I grabbed him and ran him out the back of the house.

"Stay here Max!"

Then I ran back in grabbed the fire extinguisher and I put the fire out. I opened the windows to air the room out and then I went back to Max.

"Max what happened, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, I'm sorry it's my fault."

"No it's not! What happened?"

"I was hungry, so I tried to make some pasta. I thought it needed some water so I picked up a bottle and I poured it in and then the fire started."

"Aww buddy, that wasn't water."

"Oh, it looked like water."

"I know buddy. Now come on you smell of smoke. I'll get you in the bath, you can wear some clean pajamas and then I'll get you some tea."

We both went upstairs and I started to run the bath.

"Go play with some toys while it's running."

"Okay Lena."

I left the bath to run and then went into my mom's room. I went right up to her and I slapped her.

"What the fuck was that for you bitch!"

"Come at me mom! I fucking dare you!"

She could sense how mad I was and she didn't dare.

"What have I done?"

"What have you done? Really? You're asking me that?"

"Yes!"

"You are a sad, sad excuse for a mom! I want you to fuck off, die for all I care. I go out for ten minutes and he's not even safe!"

"Who?"

"Max! You're FOUR year old son! You may not care about him but I do. I left him with you and Justin and he could have died."

"How? What's that got to do with me?"

"He's four he doesn't know the difference between vodka and water. So if some stupid, fucking twat like yourself leaves it lying around then something bad will happen."

"What did he do with my vodka?"

"He tried to make dinner, he poured it into the pan on the stove, thinking it was water, and it set alight. Your son nearly dies and all you care about is your alcohol. Well you need to sort your life out."

I walked out of her room and slammed the door. I went to see if the bath had enough water and when I saw that it did, I checked that it was the right temperature.

"Max! Your baths ready."

Max came running in shutting the door behind him.

"Do you want me to sit in the bathroom with you or do you want to go in the bath on your own?"

"I want to be on my own!"

"Okay then buddy remember, no lying down if I'm not in here, be careful okay! I don't want anything to happen and if you are worried just shout me okay?"

"Yeah, can I lock the door?"

"Definitely not!"

"Okay Lena I won't."

"Good boy, I'll check on you in a minute."

I went to Justin's room.

"Justin what did I ask you?" I yelled.

"I don't know, can you go?"

He was messing around with some sort of thing. I think it was sciency. I just grabbed it out of his hands.

"Give it back."

"What did I ask you to do?"

"Watch Max now give it back!"

"Did you watch Max?"

"Yes."

"Then how come when I got back there was a fire downstairs and Max was right in front of it."

"I don't know."

"You don't know. That's all you have to say. You are an absolute disgrace. No is he okay? Or what happened?"

I was so pissed off at that moment it was unreal.

"Kay, Just give me it back."

"Give it you back?"

"Yes."

I walked up to the window and threw it down on the floor with enough force to break it.

"Go fetch."

He looked like he was about to cry and he ran out to get it leaving me laughing.

I went back to Max, to check up on him.

"Max, have you washed?"

"Yes Lena."

"Okay I'll get you a towel and your pajamas."

I went to his room and got his towel off the dresser. Then I got his new fireman Sam pajamas from off his bed.

I walked into the bathroom and put the pajamas on the top of the toilet. I held the towel at the corners and held it out in front of me ready to catch Max.

"Alright then, on the count of three. One. Two. Three."

He jumped out of the bath and landed in my awaiting arms. I dried him off with the towel and then I let him put his pajamas on.

"See you're a big boy now."

"Yeah."

He smiled at me and I picked him up, cuddling him into my side.

"Come on then, I'll put something on the telly while I do dinner."

"Simpsons! Simpsons!"

"Nope, not tonight."

"Fine. Fireman Sam."

"That, you can watch."

I looked in the cupboards to see what we had and by the looks of things there was just microwavable hotdogs and like four buns. We had some coke in the fridge so I just did us Coke, and then put the hotdogs on the buns.

"Maxy dinner is ready!"

He came running in and sat beside me at the table.

"Hotdogs!"

We ate our dinner and spoke about what had happened at school, I obviously had to hide most of what happened for me as his young, innocent ears were not supposed to hear such things.

"Oh my god buddy! It's already eight o'clock!"

"Bedtime." He moaned.

"Yep, bedtime."

I took him up to his room and tucked him in. I went to look at his books to choose one to read but when I turned round he was asleep. I kissed him on the forehead and walked out shutting the door behind me.

I saw Justin crying at his desk as I walked back to my room. He was clutching the thing that I broke and I couldn't help but laugh.

When I walked into my room I saw two envelopes propped on my pillow. I picked the first one up and opened it. It was a letter from my dad.

Dear Selena,

I was a terrible dad! I'm so sorry, I really am! I've gone now though and it's for the best. I know that your mother doesn't get an income so I have given you some money in the other envelope. It's all that I have. It's two grand. I gave it to you because your mother will just spend it all on booze. Look after Max and look after yourself. I'm so sorry.

Love Dad.

I put the letter and the envelope in the bin and picked up the second one. Sure enough there was two grand in there. I couldn't have been happier. Me and Max were going to be fine after all. I took a shower and then headed to bed with a smile on my face. Vowing that from now on I would try at school, there would be no more detentions. I couldn't afford to get detentions. My life was Max now. If I got a detention, I couldn't work, and then I couldn't get money. The two grand would only last so long.

**A/N THANKS FOR READING:) PLEASE REVIEW.**


	5. I am a lesbian

**WEDNESDAY – AT HOME**

I woke up to the sound of my alarm going off. I was so tired! I forced myself to get out of bed remembering the vows I made the day before. I went into Max's room and found him already awake and dressed.

"Wow, you're up early."

"Yeah. Mom was making noises downstairs."

"Aww bud, are you tired?"

"No, I'll be fine."

"Okay then, do you want to stay up here and let me get dressed then?"

"Yes okay."

I walked out of Max's room and back into my own closing the door behind me. I wanted to look cute today for Miss Lovato. I felt like I needed to make an effort. I opened all my drawers and studied my clothes carefully. I had crop tots, strapless tops, t-shirts, shirts, I just didn't know what to wear. I ended up picking a white strappy top with a pink and white checked shirt over the top. Then I wore a pair of jeans that hugged me in all the right places. Topping it off with my black converse. If I may say so myself I looked hot.

"Max dude, you wanna go get some breckie?" I asked walking into his room.

"Cocopops?"

"Yeah, you can have cocopops."

"Yay."

He jumped up and ran downstairs, me following behind him.

"There isn't many cocopops left Maxy, we'll have to go shopping after school."

"Yess! I love going shopping!"

"I know you do."

I sat down next to Max and we both started to eat our cereals.

"So why do you always get detention?" Max asked me.

"Because Lena is a naughty girl."

"Why?"

"Because I was silly Max but I'm not going to be silly anymore. I'm going to be a good girl from now on, and you're going to carry on being a good boy aren't you Max?"

"Yes!"

"That's my boy!"

We finished eating and then headed upstairs.

"Fastest to brush their teeth get to push the trolley tonight!"

I know that whenever we go shopping Max absolutely loves to push the trolley. As soon as I gave him the challenge he zoomed off to the bathroom. By the time I got in there to join him he was already nearly done.

"Wow that was fast."

"Yeah, I'm so going to push the trolley!"

He was so excited that he won and it just put a smile on my face. I loved to make him happy, if Max was happy then I was happy.

"Okay then you go down and get your bag ready I just have to get something from my room."

"Okay Lena."

He raced off downstairs and I went to get the three quid I'd need for fetching him tonight. There was no way I was risking taking the money for shopping to school so we'd just come back before going.

Max had his bag ready when I got downstairs and had started on mine.

"I'll finish your bag Lena, don't worry. You can do the lunch."

I gave him a hug and thanked him, and then I did exactly what he told me and made the lunch. Before we could leave we did the 'check test' like we do every morning.

"Okay then, we have everything and we're on time."

"Let's go!"

I grabbed Max's hand and then we started the five minute walk to his school. Once we got there I gave Max a kiss on the cheek.

"Don't forget that you're staying there till half six at the latest."

"I know, have fun at your detention and be good today!"

I laughed at his warning and smiled at him.

"I will, you be good aswell."

"I will." He mimicked.

He chuckled and then ran off to join his friends, leaving me to walk to school.

Once again I was early. Maybe it was part of the new me.

**SCHOOL – FORM**

"Hey Miss."

"Selena, early again, wow!"

"Ha ha, it's not that hard to believe I can be early."

"Oh but it is."

She laughed at me and I couldn't help but smile.

"So how are you going to do today?"

"I'm going to try, I need to pull my act together, I know that now."

"Good, oh and I spoke to Steven."

"What did you say?"

"That he had to tell people it wasn't true and shut up about it or I would get him kicked out and then arrested for dealing drugs."

"Oh, clever."

"Yep."

She smirked at me and once again I couldn't help but smile. I never could with Miss Lovato.

"Now I just have to explain it to Taylor."

"It will go fine!"

"No, it won't"

"Well here she comes."

"Gee thanks for the help."

"It's what I'm here for."

I glared at her and she just laughed. Then I walked up to Taylor praying that she wasn't mad.

"Hey Tay!"

"Selena."

We both sat down in our seats.

"Are you mad at me?" I wondered aloud.

"Should I be?"

"No."

"You gave a guy a blowjob for weed, and I shouldn't be mad at you?"

"I didn't really do it!"

"Yes you did!"

"I didn't, you can ask Steven he was just pissing about!"

"I could tell by your facial expression that what he said was true, so why don't you save us both the time and quit lying?"

"Taylor please."

"Something's going on with Miley! More than you will let on, you wouldn't want weed and be that desperate to get it if something hadn't happened. What did you really argue about in Biology?"

"I told you! It was about the alcohol."

"No it wasn't! Stop lying to me."

"I'm not lying I swear!"

"I thought we were close friends. Yet you're lying to me, and you won't tell me."

"I just can't, please drop it!"

"I can't be your friend if you don't tell me!"

"That's pathetic!"

"I don't care; you obviously don't trust me enough to tell. So our friendship means Jack all to you anyway!"

"It means everything, and that's why I don't want to tell you. I'm scared you'll hate me."

"I would never hate you, just tell me." She softened.

"Promise me. Promise that after I tell you, you won't treat me any different."

"I promise."

"I. I. I am a lesbian, I had this thing with Miley and now she's ashamed and she was saying how disgusting it was so I did that with Steven to take my mind off things and to try and make me straight. There, you happy now?"

Just as I said that the bell rang, I took the opportunity to leave and I ran out of the classroom.

I ran to Miss Riles' room as fast as I could, I went straight in and took a seat. Not before handing her my report. Taylor came in like five minutes after and sat on the seat next to me.

**1****ST**** LESSON - DRAMA**

"We need to talk."

"Sorry we're in a lesson and I need to concentrate."

She shut up after that.

"Okay class! This lesson is about sexual orientation."

As soon as she said that I knew I couldn't handle it. Not today. I went up to her and handed her my time out card, whilst collecting my report. Then I left to find Miss Lovato. I'm pretty sure she has a free period every day, and this lesson is her freebie today. I knocked on her door and then heard her call me in.

"Oh hi Selena, why aren't you in class?"

"I used my time out card."

She grabbed a seat and positioned it next to hers by her desk.

"Come and take a seat."

"Thankyou."

"So do you want to tell me why you used your card?"

"We were in drama, and Miss Riles said that we were doing about sexual orientation and I had only just told Taylor."

"So you freaked out?" She guessed.

"Yeah, I didn't want to sit there and talk about it with her, I wasn't, scratch that, I'm not ready."

"You know being a lesbian is nothing to be ashamed of right?"

"Then how come everyone else seems to think so?"

"They don't. Not everyone. I think Taylor will be fine with it."

"I'm just scared."

"I know, how about we take your mind off it."

"How?" I asked.

"Twenty question?" She suggested.

I did like the sound of that.

"Okay then, you first."

ML: "How far have you gone with a girl before?"

S: "Just kissing really, Miley is the first girl I've been with and you sort of saw how far we got."

I started to blush and she just smiled.

ML: "Okay, your turn."

S: "Do you have a boyfriend?"

ML: "No I don't. You are the first person I am going to tell in school because I know I can trust you."

S: "Okay…"

ML: "I, Miss Lovato, am a lesbian."

S: "No way!"

ML: "Yep. I like girls."

S: "That's so cool."

ML: "Why thank you. Now it's my turn again. Who do you fancy right now?"

S: "Umm… no one."

ML: "Bullshit!"

S: "Nope, it's true!"

ML: "I'll go in a mood with you if you carry on lying."

I couldn't have that!

S: "Fine. Can I give you clues?"

ML: "Okay…"

S: "They go to this school."

ML: "Miley?"

S: "After everything that happened?"

ML: "Oh yeah, next clue."

S: "They are a teacher."

ML: "Miss Thorton?"

S: "She is very good looking but no."

ML: "She is isn't she! Now next clue."

S: "Ha ha, she is a maths teacher."

ML: "Oh my fucking god! It's me!"

S: "Kay, well I'm going to go die in a hole, bye."

I went to walk away but she just grabbed my arm and pulled me back.

ML: "Oh no you don't. You were brave and answered so I'll let you ask me two questions."

S: "Okay, umm…, first one is, how far have you gone with a girl?"

ML: "Well sweetie, I am twenty-four, how far do you think I've gone?"

S: "I can be so dumb sometimes."

ML: "Yeah."

S: "That was the part where you were supposed to say, no you aren't dumb Selena!"

ML: "Oh well. Next question."

S: "Who do you fancy right now?"

ML: "Next question!"

S: "I don't think so! I had to answer, now you do."

ML: "Fine. I fancy…"

S: "Drumroll."

ML: "You."

S: "What?"

I was not expecting that!

ML: "Well you're pretty, you're smart, you're sweet, what's there not to like?"

I couldn't say anything I was just left smiling at her like an idiot.

ML: "But you're my student so nothing can happen."

S: "Oh yeah, right."

ML: "I'm sorry, Sel."

S: "It's okay, at least I get to be close with you."

ML: "That you do, anyway the bell is about to go, what do you have next?"

S: "You don't know your schedule very well do you?"

ML: "What?"

S: "I have Maths next, you know, with you."

ML: "Oh."

We both started laughing but then stopped when everyone else began to pile in.

ML: "Well go take your seat, I'll talk to you at break."

She gave me a subtle wink then I went to sit in my assigned seat.

It wasn't long before Taylor came in and she was sitting beside me.

**MISS LOVATO'S POV – 2****ND**** LESSON MATHS**

"Selena, why did you run off and why did you leave Drama?" Taylor asked.

"I wasn't ready to talk."

"Talk about what?"

"My sexuality Taylor."

"You didn't have to talk about that though!"

"Really? That's what the lesson was fucking about and I'll bet you there were many homophobic comments." Selena whisper shouted.

"Doesn't mean you had to leave."

I looked over at Selena and Taylor and noticed that Selena was crying. I really did feel for the poor girl, she just couldn't get a break. I decided that I'd tell them to go out and talk, they looked like they needed privacy.

"Yes it did! Do you really think I want to sit around and listen to people going on about how being a lesbian is wrong! I wouldn't listen to Miley in Biology and I wasn't listening to them in drama."

"Girls, head outside and talk out there, okay?" I offered.

"Yeah thanks Miss." Taylor muttered.

"It's okay Taylor. Selena are you okay sweetie?" I asked.

She looked up at me and I could tell that she wasn't.

"Yeah I'm fine."

"Okay, well come and see me at break."

"I will."

The two girls left the classroom and then I carried on with the lesson, trying so hard to resist the urge of just going out there and comforting her.

**SELENA'S POV**

We went right outside and sat underneath the infamous tree behind the classroom.

"I am so mad at you right now Sel."

"Why? Because I'm a dyke? Because I'm so disgusting? I knew that you wouldn't agree, that's why I didn't want to say anything."

"No! Because you didn't tell me, because you told Miley and not me. Because you thought I'd disown you as a friend. How could you think that? We've been best friends since forever. You mean everything to me. Everything! I could never hate you just because you like girls. It's not disgusting, it makes you, you."

"I don't know what to say." I whispered.

"Just come here."

She pulled me into a hug and I just cried and cried. I didn't think that's she'd be okay with it. I thought that she'd hate me. I was just so scared.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"It's okay, but no more secrets. You know now, that you can tell me anything."

"Okay."

"But promise me one thing."

"What?"

"Never do anything like that again with Steven or any other guy."

"I promise."

"Good."

She hugged me again and then we headed back to the classroom.

"Are you girls okay now?"

"Yeah. We're fine."

I could see the worry and concern in Miss Lovato's eyes, and I could see it fade when she saw my smile.

"Good. Take your seats, the work is on the board."

We both thanked her for letting us leave and then went to sit down.

"Sel, I don't understand number one." Taylor moaned.

"What is it?"

"Well there's two. The first one says: 5x + 10y = 15 and then the second one says: 5x + 3y = 1. You have to work out y and x."

"Well basically you have to take: 5x + 10y = 15 away from: 5x + 3y = 1. So start with the x's 5x – 5x = 0x. Then the y's 10y – 3y = 7y. Now the numbers 15 – 1 = 14. So now you have 7y = 14. You just want to know what 1y is though so you divide it by 7. And you get y=2. Then to find out x you have to choose one of the equations and fill in y. So if I choose the second one I have: 5x + 6 = 1. So x would be -1 because -1 x 5 = -5. And -5 + 6 = 1. Do you understand?"

"Oh my god! That's actually quite simple. Thanks."

"Well aren't we smart?"

I turned around to see Miss Lovato smirking at me.

"Well I do try." I joked.

"Ha ha, I'll see you at break braniac." She teased.

I smiled at Miss Lovato as she walked off and she smiled back.

"You have a crush on our maths teacher!" Taylor exclaimed.

"I do not."

"You so do!"

I started to blush increasingly which made it sort of obvious.

"Okay so maybe I do."

"Aww that's so cute."

"Shut up!"

"Do you want to rub your x on her y?"

"What that doesn't even make sense."

We both burst out laughing either way.

"You want to factorise her equation."

"Shut uuuuup!"

"Ha ha!"

I couldn't stop laughing. I was in such hysterics.

"You need to shut up now, what if she hears?"

"Don't you want her to know that you dream of being lovers?" Taylor asked.

"Shut up!"

"Ha ha, fine."

The bell went then and everybody got up to leave.

**BREAK**

"I'll see you in Chemistry." I said to Taylor.

"Kay babe, I'll sit by you and we can stay away from Stacey and Miley."

"Thanks."

I went up and sat beside Miss Lovato at her desk.

"So she took it well?" Miss smiled.

"Yeah."

"I could tell."

"How?" I asked.

"Well if she is teasing you about girls and fancying them in a jokey friendly way that usually means she'd be okay with it."

"When did she tease me?"

"Oh just earlier, you know. You wanna factorise my equation."

I am going to die of embarrassment.

"She made that up I never said that."

"Do not fear, for I have found out that you wish to be lovers."

"Shut up! That's so embarrassing."

"Well you said it, not me."

"No! Taylor said it."

"Yeah okay." She scoffed.

"Yeah!" I agreed.

"Well you were thinking it."

"Maybe I was."

I don't think she expected me to say that, the look on her face proved that I caught her off guard.

"You were?"

"Well yeah. You're pretty, kind, and you've seen me in a bra. What's not to like about you?"

I winked at her and for once I wasn't the one blushing.

"Oh my god Sel!"

"What?"

I smiled innocently at her.

"Don't say stuff like that."

"Oh. So it's okay for you to embarrass me but I can't embarrass you?"

"Yes. Exactly!"

"Well that's no fair." I said.

"I'm not fair. I'm your teacher therefore I don't have to be."

"Well, I'm your student therefore you should treat me with equality."

"Ohh equality, that's a big word."

"Leave me alone."

"What lesson have you got next?"

"Chemistry."

"Oh with Miley?"

"Yeah and Stacey."

"Who's Stacey?"

"Miley's bitch."

"Miley has a bitch?"

"Yep. That's gonna terrorise me."

"Send them my way the twats." Miss Lovato defended.

"Ha, I thought teachers weren't supposed to take sides?"

"We're not but you're different."

"How so?"

"I like you a lot more than the average student, and if anyone were to hurt or harm you there is no way that I would be fair."

"You're so sweet."

"Yeah. I'd give that mother fucker so bad of a detention that they'd never see the light of day at break or lunch!"

"Aww! Lovato is my bodyguard."

"You know it, Gomez!"

We sat there just smiling at each other for a while until the bell rang.

"Alright, pass me your report."

I gave her my report and she gave me an excellent and two points.

"Here you go sweetie."

"Thanks."

"It's fine, I'll see you after school for your detention and just ignore Miley and that Stacey chick."

"Will do."

I left the classroom and headed round to chemistry to find Taylor. Everyone had already gone in so I just gave Mr Shaw my report and took my seat.

**3****RD**** LESSON - CHEMISTRY**

"How was break with sexy Lovato?" Taylor asked.

"Oh ha ha."

I turned my attention to the front when Mr Shaw began to explain the task.

"Okay right, you will be put into fours and then I want you to work on the atom sheet in front of you, together. You're pairs are now on the board."

He put up a list which had about 9 boxes, each containing four students. I looked for mine and Taylor's name and saw that we were with Miley and Stacey.

The two bitches came up to us and sat by our desk.

"Ugh. Looks like we're with the dyke, Miley."

Stacey was laughing but Miley just looked uneasy.

"Excuse me?" I demanded.

"Miley told me all about how you tried to come onto her. Then you got her drunk and practically tried to rape her."

"What the fuck?" I yelled.

"Aww, don't like it when Miley tells your secrets?"

"That's not even true so no I don't give a fuck."

Really it got to me. One second Miley was my best friend and now she's just some bitch who was spreading lies about me. I looked at her and she just smirked.

"How about you shut the fuck up Stacey. As if Selena would ever stoop so low as to touch that." Taylor defended.

Taylor just glared at Miley.

"Well she touched Steven." Miley retorted.

"No she didn't, and even if she did, he's irrelevant. If you compare the two of you he wins straight off."

You could tell that Miley was defeated. Taylor always knew the best things to say.

"Whatever Taylor, you're probably just sticking up for her because you're fucking her."

"Yeah Stacey that's why. I'm fucking Selena. You make me laugh, you really need to get a life. If all you have time for is spreading a load of rumours and trying to bring others down, I genuinely feel for you."

"Whatever."

I really wanted to punch the stupid bitch in the face but I knew I couldn't. I would be letting Miss Lovato down and at the same time, I would be letting Max down. I promised that I wouldn't get in any more shit, I can't.

"Look Stacey, you hate me, I hate you. Same with Miley. But I actually have to do the work. So whether or not you do it with us, I still have to do it."

"Yeah cause I'm gonna work with you."

"Fine. Me and Taylor will do it. You can just sit with Miley and do whatever it is you two do."

Me and Taylor got on with the worksheet after that. It took us the entire lesson to complete as it was really hard but eventually it was done. Miley and Stacey had spent the whole lesson just staring at us and laughing. To be honest it wasn't bothering me that much, they were just pathetic. The bell went and we were dismissed but before we could leave I received a threat from Stacey.

"You better be careful whore. Someone may have something in their possession that could ruin you."

"What are you talking about?"

"You'll see."

They walked off and I got my report card, one more excellent. Yay!

I was curious though and a little bit scared about what Stacey was talking about.


	6. You seen your mail yet?

**LUNCH**

For the second time that week me and Taylor went outside for lunch, to relax.

"So what do you thing Stacey was talking about?" I asked.

"I don't know. Probably nothing."

"But what if it's something. She said it could ruin me."

"She's probably just bluffing."

"Yeah! But what if she's not?"

"Then we will deal with that, if it happens. But right now can you just chill?"

"I guess you're right."

"I always am. Now tell me about Miss Lovato."

"What do you mean?"

"Well you've spent loads of time together, what have you learnt?"

"Just a few things."

"Ohh! Tell me! Does she have a boyfriend?"

"Why do you want to know that?"

"I don't know. It's just you never think of teachers having sex but Miss Lovato is all young and hot so she most likely does and I was curious." Taylor laughed.

"She doesn't have a boyfriend."

"Really? Looking the way she does? Man I have no hope."

"She's a lesbian."

"No fucking way!"

"That's what I said when I found out."

"So, she has a girlfriend?"

"Nope not that I know of."

"You should try your chances with her!"

"Taylor, she's a teacher."

"Yeah, so?"

"So, it's illegal. I don't want to get her into trouble."

"No one would know."

"Yeah they would, someone would find out and then we'd be screwed."

"True. But either way I think you should try."

"Maybe I will." I said.

"So how long have you known that you're a lesbian?"

"I dunno like since I can remember."

"So how many girls have you been with?"

"Just Miley and I wasn't really 'with' her."

"So how far did you go with her?"

"We just made out. When we got drunk, we were making out in our bras. We obviously had trousers on still but Miss Lovato caught us."

"Miss Lovato has seen you in your bra?"

"Yep. It was so embarrassing. I started telling her she was sexy and that I wanted her to kiss me."

"Omg! Facepalm much?"

"I know. I spoke to her about it and asked her to drop it and she told me I had a hot body."

"She did not!"

"She did."

"You definitely should date now!"

"I want to, if I'm honest."

"Awww."

"Omg! I forgot to tell you, my dad left."

"No way?"

"Yes way. And Max set a fire in the kitchen!"

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah, but he may not have been if I hadn't of got home when I did."

"Why, where were you?"

"I went to get a job."

"Where?"

"The café down the road from mine."

"Why do you need a job?"

"Well my mom won't give me any money for anything to do with Max or myself so I figured I'd just have to earn it."

"Aww. When are you working?"

"Every weekday, starting Thursday. From three-fifty to six-fifty."

"That's a three hour shift! And straight after school."

"I know but it's worth it."

"Where's Max going?" She questioned.

"To his after school programme. It will cost me three quid a day but that's fine."

"Are you going to be able to afford that?"

"Yeah. I get £3 an hour so that's £12 a day. £3 of that goes to Max's school that leaves me with £9. I put that aside until Saturday and I'll have £45 and I can use that to keep the house stocked up. My dad left me 2 grand so I can use that if I need to."

"Are you sure this is the right thing to do?"

"Yes. I have to look after Max!"

"Yeah, but shouldn't your mom be doing this?"

"Yeah she should. But she won't. So if I don't do it, we're gonna have no money for food or anything. Then the social will be round and we'll end up being taken away and then separated. I can't do that to Max."

"I guess. Man your life is so sad and complicated."

"Mergh. It's not that bad." I shrugged.

After all the heartfelt talk we realised that lunch was practically over. The bell would go in about a minute.

"We need to get to next lesson." Taylor sighed.

"Yep. Friles is going to give me such a hard time."

"Just ignore him. Stay positive and be polite. Remember you are doing all of this for Max."

"I know."

I gave her a weak smile and then we both walked to English.

**4****TH**** LESSON – ENGLISH**

I walked in and handed Mr Friles my report.

"Selena, on report. Such a shock."

I knew that he was waiting for a retort but I just smiled sweetly.

"Yes sir, I'm on report. Part of my mentor scheme."

"What fool would do that for you?"

I wanted so badly to have a go at him, calling Miss Lovato a fool but I just bit my lip.

"That's not import sir, may I take my seat?"

"Yes."

You could tell that he was still sceptical, he was just waiting for me to screw up.

I took my seat next to Taylor and then turned my full attention to Mr Friles.

"This lesson will be all about Shakespeare. We are reading the prologue of Romeo and Juliet and then discussing it."

Most people in the class groaned. I just stayed silent and continued my focus.

"Selena. You read for us."

"Yes sir."

I opened the book up and began reading.

"Two households, both alike in dignity,  
In fair Verona, where we lay our scene,  
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,  
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.  
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes  
A pair of star-cross'd lovers take their life;  
Whose misadventured piteous overthrows  
Do with their death bury their parents' strife.  
The fearful passage of their death-mark'd love,  
And the continuance of their parents' rage,  
Which, but their children's end, nought could remove,  
Is now the two hours' traffic of our stage;  
The which if you with patient ears attend,  
What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend."

"Thank you Selena."

"It's no problem Sir."

"Okay then everybody, what do you think this is telling us?"

No one put their hand up.

"Okay I shall choose someone then… Selena?"

It was starting to piss me off, the fact that he was picking on me.

"Yes sir?"

"What do you think this told us?"

"Well, I think it's saying that there were two families in Verona, both quite similar in pride. But they were enemies. They fall in love but it's forbidden. They take their lives but yet not even that can end their family's feud."

I could tell that he was shocked with my answer. He thought I was dumb. That's what they all fault. I guess I hadn't really given them reason to believe any different.

"Very good, Selena."

I smiled at Mr Friley.

"Okay, now I want you to discuss it with your partner and then together make your own prologue to your own play, similar to Romeo and Juliet."

Me and Taylor got started right away.

"So what do you want to do?"

"I do not have a clue."

"Okay well Sel I think we should do a romance between two girls or two guys?" Taylor suggested.

"Yeah that's a good idea."

"Okay then. We can call them Selena, and what is Miss Lovato's name?"

"Oh ha ha you're so funny. And I don't even know!"

"Oh."

"Anyway, I have to ask Sir something."

I put my hand up and waited for him to be finished talking to someone else.

"Yes, Selena?"

"Do we have to write Shakespearian or can we do it modern?"

"Good question. It can be either."

"Okay, thanks."

I turned back to Taylor.

"Can we do it modern?"

"Yeah, I would prefer that anyway."

"Good. Okay then, so what are we calling them?"

"Well I think one of them should have a unisex name, what about Alex?"

"Yeah that's perfect, and what about Mitchie? I like that name."

"Yeah. Okay that's settled. We have Alex and Mitchie. What should the storyline be?"

"They could be best friends, their families as well. Mitchie and her family could be proper hard core Christians. And be totally against gays. Alex's family could be the complete opposite?"

"Yeah, that sounds like an awesome idea."

"Thanks."

We were just about to write it all down when the bell went. I went over to Mr Friles to get my report. He had given me a good which to be honest pissed me off. I so deserved an excellent! I wasn't going to say anything though so I just grabbed Taylor's hand and we headed to our last lesson.

"What lesson do we have next Sel?"

"As if you don't know, I'm always asking you."

"Well do you know or not?" Taylor asked.

"We have physics."

"Oh yeah with Mrs Pierce. Our last lesson."

"Yep."

We made it to physics and like I did in every lesson, I handed the teacher my report.

**5****TH**** LESSON – PHYSICS**

I was hoping that we wouldn't have any altercations with Miley and Stacey this lesson. But once again my hopes were not reached.

Stacey came up to me and got all up in my face.

"You might want to check your mail when you get home." Stacey warned.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

She ignored my question and just walked off with Miley. I took my seat and turned to Taylor.

"See I told you she wasn't bluffing."

"She may still be bluffing, we don't have any proof."

"I'm just scared."

"Why?"

"I don't know, it's just everything is finally going okay and I don't want it to end."

"It won't end. I promise, it's all going to be fine."

"Okay. But don't make promises you can't keep."

I turned my focus back to the teacher, like I had done in every lesson.

"Okay so, it's the last lesson of the day and I have work I need to finish. Just carry on with your work from last lesson and then you can just talk when you're done."

I loved it when teachers acted like this. Mrs Pierce only allowed us because we were already ahead.

"Didn't we finish the work last lesson?"

"Yep."

"Awesome, so we can just talk?"

"Yes we can."

"Good. Now what do you think Stacey was talking about?"

"Okay, Selena hunny! I love you and all but if you don't fucking drop it then I'm going to kill you."

"Fine."

"Thank you."

"So how is it going with that guy?"

"Which guy?"

"You know the one you hooked up with?"

"Eddie?"

"You hooked up with Eddie?"

"Umm… Yeah, you did just ask me about it."

"Yeah but I wasn't listening when you told me."

"Oh gee… thanks."

"I'm sorry. But you have fancied Eddie since I can remember!"

"I know but I think he just wanted sex because I haven't spoken to him since."

"Wait! You had sex with him?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry."

"I can't believe that, I thought I would lose my 'v' way before you."

"I know but I was drunk and he was just so up front and I wanted it."

"Did you like it?"

"Yeah, it was amazing!"

"Well I'm glad that you at least enjoyed it."

"Thanks, and I don't think it matters so much that he just wanted sex."

"Why?"

"Because to be honest, I don't even like him that much anymore, and I'm not even that gutted."

"Oh okay well that's good."

"Yeah."

"So what about you and Steven?" Taylor asked.

"There is no me and Steven."

"No but like what is going to happen?"

"Nothing really. He just has to tell everyone it's not true and I get to pretend that it didn't happen."

"Do you regret it?"

"So much!"

"Well at least it's over now. And you don't have to go through it again."

"Yeah I guess."

That lesson went so fast! It felt like we had only just come in but the bell was ringing and everyone was leaving.

"Okay so I'll see you tomorrow, Tay."

"Yeah, bye."

"Bye."

I went up to Mrs Pierce and took my report card. Then headed out to Miss Lovato's room. I didn't even bother to knock I just walked straight in.

**AFTER SCHOOL – DETENTION**

I walked into Miss Lovato's classroom and she set an alarm for six. Making sure we didn't run over the time.

"What's up Miss L."

"Miss L?"

"Yep, that is what I shall call you from now on."

"No…"

"What's your name?"

"Miss Lovato…"

"No I mean your real name."

"Oh, Demi."

"Demi, that's such a beautiful name."

I winked at her and then took my seat.

"You're getting very cocky, aren't you?" Demi smirked.

"Yeah well, you give me confidence."

"You're so cute!"

"Why thank you, you're not so bad yourself."

Demi, that's what I'm going to call her now, came and sat opposite me at the desk.

"So you're not going to get anymore detentions, right?" She asked.

"Nope. I'm gonna be a good girl now."

"Good. How was your day?"

"It was fine. Mr Friles pissed me of though."

"Why?"

"He gave me a good, and I so deserved an excellent."

"Oh we are getting full of ourselves today."

"No seriously, ask anyone."

"He's probably just still pissed at you."

"For being a bitch?"

"Yeah."

"I suppose. Demi? Wait, can I call you Demi?"

"Yeah."

"Good. What made you want to be a teacher?"

"I don't know. I love teaching and I love helping misunderstood teenagers, like yourself."

"Well, misunderstood teenagers, like myself, thank you."

"Ha ha, good."

"So where do you live?" I asked.

"That was a very random question."

"Yeah well. I'm getting to know you."

"Oh okay. I love near town."

"Oh cool, so do I." I gushed.

"Oh, who do you live with?"

"My mom, my younger brother Max and my older brother Justin. But I won't be for long."

"What do you mean?"

"Well my brothers leaving in just over a week and I doubt my mom will last long."

"Where's your dad?"

"He left us, yesterday."

"Aww, well you can't be left on your own!" She exclaimed.

"We can. I've been practically raising Max since he was born."

"Oh my god! I don't know what to do." She gasped.

"How so?"

"Well I should tell school but I don't want to hurt you."

"Don't tell school!"

"Hmm… kay." She agreed.

"Promise me?"

"I promise."

"Good."

"Well at least let me give you my number, you know, encase you need me."

"Okay, sure."

We both exchanged phones and then entered our own numbers.

"If anything goes wrong or anything just call or text me."

"Yeah. And if I get bored or miss my favourite teacher then I will just call or text anyway."

"That's the plan." She beamed.

"Yep."

"So what do you do when you leave school then? Like what's the average day like?"

"Well today, I have left Max at after school club, I will go fetch him and then we have to go shopping. I'll probably take him to McDonald's. Then we go home, I give him a bath, put his pj's on, we both brush our teeth and then he goes to bed."

"Wow, do you have any time for yourself?"

"Yeah on weekends, I have friends round. I still let Max hang around with us though because he never has friends round."

"You're such a sweet big sister."

"Yeah. I have a job now though, I'm starting tomorrow."

"Really? Where?"

"The café just down from my house by the town hall."

"I live right near there!"

"That means you live right near me!"

"Yay! I can't believe you have to work now though." Demi was shocked.

"Yeah but it's fine cause it's for Max."

"What about your rent?"

"Oh yeah. Well it's only a hundred a month because we get a lot of help from all the council. We get £60 a week but £15 of that goes to Max's after school. So we get £45 a week. I'll take £25 of that away and store it, so by the time the four weeks are up I'll have the £100 rent."

"You are so smart and mature. But what about shopping and stuff like that?"

"Well my dad left me with two grand before he fucked off. So I'm just going to keep that safe for emergencies. I'll take about a hundred away and use that for the big shop tonight and for maccies. And for keeping the house stocked up I'll just go shopping every weekend with the spare £20."

"You're gonna be living paycheck to paycheck though."

"Yeah but it won't be so bad. We have the spare money if we need it and I'll get a job that pays more eventually. I may get a babysitting job for on the weekends and then I could put all the money I make from that to the side ready to get stuff for Max."

"You seriously are mature, like wow!"

"Well you know, it's all for Max."

We spent like five minutes just staring at each other, it may sound a bit awkward but it wasn't, it felt right. We were disrupted though when my phone buzzed.

"Can I get that please?"

"Yes, sure."

I got my phone out and there was a text from Miley:

_It's Stacey. You seen your mail yet whore?_

"Grr!"

I looked up at Demi with pure hatred in my eyes.

"Oh have I done something or is someone just PMS'ing?"

I know that she was joking and just trying to make me laugh.

"No I'm not PMS'ing that bitch is two weeks past."

"Ever heard of too much information?" Demi cringed.

"Well you asked."

"Anyway, in all seriousness, what's up?"

"Nothing, just my mom being a bitch."

"Oh okay, you fine then?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

"I'm glad."

Before I knew what was happening we were both leaning forward. Our lips met in the middle. It was a sweet, slow kiss. It would have most likely gotten heated if the alarm hadn't have gone off.

"Umm… so I have to go." I muttered.

"Ugh, yeah. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay. I'll probably text you later."

"I'll look forward to it."

I smiled at Demi and then left the classroom, heading to Max's school

**AFTER SCHOOL – GETTING MAX**

The five minute walk was quiet and uneventful and soon I had Max by my side.

"I paid the three pound for you buddy."

"Thanks Lena."

"It's no problem. Did you have fun today?"

"Yeah, it was awesome."

"I'm glad to hear it."

"What was your day like Lena?"

"It was good Max."

We walked home and just talked about what made our day good. As soon as we got home we were greeted by Justin out on the grass with like four bags.

"Where are you going?"

"I got an early acceptance. So I'm leaving to go to school." Justin smiled.

"Oh, is mom inside?"

"Nope she left."

"What?"

"Something about being a terrible mother."

"She got that right."

"Well anyway she left. Mom's left, Dad's left and I'm leaving. You've driven everyone away. Now it's just you and Max. Good luck. Oh and there's some post for you inside."

Shit! Stacey wasn't bluffing.

I grabbed Max's hand and took him inside the house.

"Okay Max, go get changed. We have to go shopping remember."

Max ran off and I got the envelope off the side. There was a letter that read:

_Didn't know you were such a whore Selena. Or that you swung that way. Do what I say or everyone sees the pictures. Meet me in the toilets by S block at the start of lunch tomorrow! Cameron xox_

I opened up the letter and inside were two pictures. The first one was of me clearly giving Steven a blowjob and the second was of me and Miley. I was on top of Miley and kissing her. I ripped up the pictures and stuffed them in the bin.

"What was that Lena? Max asked.

"Umm nothing Max. Just junk mail."

"Oh okay. So are mom, dad and Justin all gone now?"

"Yep, they are Bud."

"That's good!"

"Yep, what we've always wanted." I gushed.

I had to stay positive and happy around Max, I didn't want him to know that anything was wrong, I couldn't have him worrying.

"Okay Max, find the house key for me while I go and get the money."

"Okay."

I was definitely gonna fix the house up on the weekend. I'd have my mom and dad's room cause it's the biggest. Then Max could have Justin's room because that's the second biggest. Mine and Max's old rooms could be kept as guest rooms. It wouldn't cost much; I just had to get some paint, and new bedding. All of our bedding is old and crap. I was going to get the key changed as well, so that any of the creepy alcoholic, drug dudes that my mom had brought round could no longer get in. It costs about £200 to get a locksmith in, and I can afford that. One tub of paint is £10. And we'll need two tubs per room. I want red for my room because the carpet is red. There is a big stain in the middle of the floor which I will need a rug to cover. That would cost £10. Max could have blue for his room which will also match the carpet. And the two guest room won't need re-decorating because me and Max kept our rooms clean. All together that would cost £250. I wasn't paying the locksmith until Saturday so I only needed £50 today. Then I would spend about £100 on shopping. And I'd need £10 for maccies.

I ran upstairs and got the £160 making sure I had enough.

"Ready. Did you find the key?" I asked Max.

"Yep."

"Okay then, let's go."

I grabbed Max's hand and then locked the door behind me.

"What are we getting from the shops, Lena?"

"We are just going to get whatever you want."

"Yay! Can we get cocopops?"

"Course we can."

As soon as we got to the shop we started off by getting the things for Saturday. We got me a nice red rug for my room, and then all the paint.

"Can I help you decorate on Saturday please, Lena?"

"Course you can."

"Yay!"

"Okay then, we have to go get some new bedding for us."

"What's bedding?"

"You know the stuff that covers your blanket?"

"Oh yeah."

We walked down the aisle and spotted all of the duvet covers.

"Oh my god! Lena they have a fireman Sam one! Can I have it? Can I have it?"

"Course you can buddy. Pop it in the trolley."

"Thankyou!"

His cute little face lit up and it warmed me inside.

"What else do you want in your room?"

"Can I get these stickers for my door and the walls?"

"Yes you can."

"Wow!"

He was looking at the glow in the dark stars.

"Can I get these?"

"Yes dude, but this is the last thing, okay?"

"Yes. Thank you Lena."

He put everything that he had chosen in the trolley and then I went to pick mine. I chose a frilly red cover with ruffles and then I got two red plush pillows to go with it. We didn't need to get covers for the pillows because they came with the duvet covers. For the two guest rooms I just got plain white ones.

"Okay Maxy, now we have to get actual food and drinks."

"Okay."

We started off with the breakfast stuff.

"Can we get pancakes?"

"Yes we can. You get the pancakes and I'll get the waffles."

"Can I get the cocopops as well?"

"Yes you can."

We carried on with the rest of the shopping, it took us like two hours. Once we were finished we had gotten: pancakes, waffles, cocopops, sugarpuffs, Weetabix, plenty of meats, chicken nuggets, sausages, ketchup, sugar, flour, coffee, tea, juice, coke, Fanta, plenty of sweets and pudding, vitamin tablets, milk, cheese, cream, ice cream, ice lollies, ice, washing tablet, soap, washing up liquid, shampoo. Everything and anything you would need to survive. It came up to exactly £150 but it was so worth it. We had everything we needed for the decorating, we still had plenty of money left at home for the locksmith and for just general savings and I don't think our house had ever been that stocked up before.

"Wow. We got so much!" Max exclaimed.

"I know, we're so lucky they let us borrow this trolley. Otherwise we never would have gotten this all home."

"When are you going to give the trolley back?"

"I'll take it before school tomorrow."

We headed back home, stopping off at McDonald's on the way to have dinner.

I unlocked the door and we both went into the house. I put the telly on for Max.

"Just watch fireman Sam until I've put everything away and then we'll go up and you can have a bath."

"Okay Lena."

Before I could put anything away I had to clean out the whole of the fridge and the whole of the freezer. There was a load of booze which I emptied in the sink and then put them in the recycling. I had to get rid of everything because it had all gone mouldy. I put away everything that belonged in the fridge and freezer and then went on to cleaning the cupboards. Eventually the whole kitchen was squeaky clean and everything was put away.

"Alright Maximillions, time for a bath!"

"Yay!"

Max always had loved bath time. He sat in the bath while it ran, I never usually let him but he wanted to prove he was a big boy.

"I'll call you when I'm done, Lena."

"Okay, Max."

I went out and ran down to the lounge room. I grabbed the vacuum and started to clean. By the time I had finished Max had called me.

I grabbed his towel and pyjamas and brought them into the bathroom.

"Okay Maxy. One…Two…Three…Jump!"

He jumped into my arms and I wrapped him in the towel.

"I'll get myself dressed."

"Yep. Cause you're a big boy."

He got dressed and then I made him do his teeth.

"Once you're done, you can go to sleep."

"I will, Lena."

"Can I not read you a story today because I have to do some tidying?"

"Okay Lena."

I got him wrapped up in his blanket and then went down to the dining room. That didn't take me long to clean as all I had to do was sweep the floor. I went upstairs to the bathroom and began to clean. I scrubbed the bath and cleared it of all the empty bottles replacing them with the ones I had brought today. I scrubbed the counters and swept the floor.

I decided that I had done enough tidying. I had a shower, brushed my teeth and then went downstairs to lock both doors. With everything that I had done I had completely forgotten about the whole Cameron/Miley/Stacey thing but now it was clear on my mind.

I decided to try and take my mind off it by texting Demi. The kiss we had was the only thing that could cheer me up.

**S:Hey!:)**

**D:Hey Sel xx**

**S:So today was fun?xx**

**D:Yeah it was, did I freak you out with the whole kiss?xx**

**S:Nope, it was the best thing that's ever happened to me xx**

**D:Really?xx**

**S:Definetely xx**

**D:Good:) So what have you been doing?xx**

**S:Just went shopping, stocked up the house, got stuff for decorating on Friday/Saturday xx**

**D:Oh who's doing it?xx**

**S:Just me and Max. Everyone else has gone xx**

**D:For good? ****What about your mom and Justin?xx**

**S:Mom got up and just left and Justin has got an early acceptance xx**

**D:Aww so you're all on your own?xx**

**S:Yes, well I have Max:'Dxx**

**D:I can come round Friday to help you?xx**

**S:Are you joking or are you being serious?xx**

**D:I was being serious xx**

**S:Well then yeah, I'd love you to xx**

**D:I can come down at like quarter past seven cause you will have finished work by then, right?xx**

**S:Yes xx**

**D:What about Max? Won't he say something?xx**

**S:No, he knows I like girls. And he won't know your my teacher xx**

**D:True and by the way you said that, it sounded like we were going to be doing more than decorating on Friday?xx**

**S:Maybe that was the plan xx**

**D:I'm just a bit afraid of all the things that can happen if we start this xx**

**S:I know but we can act normal at school and then you can come to mine at like seven. It will be easy to hide because I only have Max here anyway so we won't have to worry about that xx**

**D:Okay. I just want you to know Sel that I really like you. I know we only met Monday but the second I laid eyes on your gorgeous face I was completely for you. I want to be with you. It may be a bit quick but it feels right! I do want to take it slow though because I don't want this to be fucked up! Do you want to give it a go? xx**

**S:Definetely! I feel the same way Dems. It feels like I've known you way longer than two days. And some people meet at a club and get together which is not even a day! We should class Friday and Saturday as our date:) xx**

**D:I love that idea! xx**

**S:Good:D I have to go to sleep now though because I'm tired. I'll see you tomorrow Dems! xoxoxoxxoxo**

**D:Night babe, see you tomorrow xoxoxoxxoxox**

I loved the way she called me babe.

**A/N I WILL BE UPDATING SOON ENOUGH. PLEASE REVIEW.**


	7. Enough to make my heart skip a beat

**THURSDAY**

"Lena! Wake up. We have to go earlier today so you can take the trolley back." Max shouted, running into my room, and waking me from my slumber.

"Okay, okay. I know. Go get dressed Maxy and then I'll take you downstairs."

Max ran out and then I got up. I was really scared. I didn't want to go to school but I knew that if I didn't they would just release the pictures anyway.

I got dressed, I was wearing a pair of denim shorts with a black strappy top and once again my black converse. I went to fetch Max and then we both went down for breakfast.

"What are you having today, Maximillions?"

"Umm… Cocopops!"

"How did I know."

"What are you going to have?"

"I'll just have the same, it's easier"

I did us both our cereals and then we sat down to eat.

"You know that we're decorating tomorrow after school and on Saturday right, Max?"

"Yep, Lena."

"Well one of my friends is coming round to help, okay?"

"Which friend?" Max asked.

"Demi."

"Is she a new friend?"

"Yes she is buddy."

"Is she just a friend or is she your princess?"

"She's my princess, or at least she will be."

"I can't wait to meet her!"

"She can't wait to meet you either Maxy!"

It was times like this that he made me melt inside. I was so lucky to have such an adorable baby brother.

"Okay Max, well we need to leave earlier to get the trolley dropped off so run up quick to get your stuff for school and I'll do our lunch."

Just as I said that the pictures flashed in my mind and I remembered the note: 'Meet me at lunch.' I was dreading today so badly! A voice in my head kept telling me that I wouldn't want lunch today.

"Yes, Lena."

He ran off and I did his lunch. We quickly did our routine check list and then we were ready to go.

We probably looked like a bunch of complete weirdos running down the road with the trolley but I don't think either of us cared. It took us only three minutes to get to Max's school as we were running.

"Okay, I shall see you tonight at like 7." I said.

"Why seven?"

"Because I have work."

"You work now?"

"Yep."

"That's so cool, have fun." Max beamed.

"I will do bud, you too."

I left Max at his school and then ran back to the shop it took me five minutes and by the time the trolley was delivered I was literally dying. I was sat down on the curb trying to catch my breath when someone sat beside me.

"Fancy seeing you here."

"Demi!"

"You seem glad to see me?"

"Maybe a little."

"Well I am sort of glad too."

"So why are you here?" I asked.

"Oh well I was running late for school and I was just about to go but then I saw you and I couldn't not come and say hello."

"Aww."

"So why are you here? And why are you so sweaty and tired?" She questioned.

"You know how to charm a girl, don't you?"

"Well… I happen to think sweaty looks good on you."

"So sweet."

"Yeah, so what were you doing?"

"Well I got a big shop from here last night and they let me borrow the trolley to take all the shopping home. So I had to just leg it with Max to his school then leg it back here to give them the trolley."

"Wow. Eventful."

"Don't you know it."

"So how was last night?"

"It was fine you know, I think we're going to be fine. A certain woman made it all the better though."

"Oh yeah? Who's this woman?"

"Oh you may know her."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Can you describe her?" She teased.

"Okay, she has long, brown wavy hair that matches her deep, brown eyes. She has the cutest butt chin. The nicest boobs, they're not too big but not too small. She has a nice ass as well, nice and firm. Umm… Basically she just looks perfect. She's really beautiful! Do you know who it is yet?" I decided to play along.

She had a huge grin on her face; she scanned the area and then brought her lips to my own. It was only a short kiss because we were out in the open but it was still enough to make my heart skip a beat.

"I think you guessed?"

"Yeah I did. You're too cute!"

"Aww, thanks Dems."

"It's my pleasure. Anyway we need to go to school now."

"Yeah kay."

We walked to school, chatting about random, general stuff. It only took five minutes to walk so we didn't have much time. As soon as we got into the classroom I subtly winked at Demi and then joined Taylor at our desk.

"Hey Tay."

"Hey babes."

"How was your night last night?" I asked.

"It was okay not much happened, you?"

"My mom and Justin have gone! Now it's just me and Max and I couldn't be happier."

"Oh my gosh!"

"I know. And we're going to decorate the house Friday and Saturday."

"Do you want me to come round and help?"

"No, it's fine."

The look on her face told me that she thought I was just blowing her off.

"I would like you too but Demi already is and it's like sort of a date."

"Demi?"

I didn't want to say it out loud encase people were listening so I just sort of stared at Miss Lovato for a while hoping she would get it.

"Oh my god! No?" She gasped!

I'm guessing she did get it.

"Yep. I'm so excited!"

"I'm so excited for you!"

"Thanks."

"Ohhh, I just remembered, was there anything in your mail?"

She was laughing so I knew she expected no. I felt bad about lying but I couldn't tell her. If I wasn't telling Demi then I wasn't telling her.

"No."

I joined in on her laughing to make it believable but inside I was shattering.

"Okay class, form is over. Have a good day!"

Me and Taylor left the classroom, saying goodbye to Demi on the way, and then headed to PE.

**1****ST ****LESSON – PE**

"What do you reckon we're doing today?"

Me and Taylor were changing in the allocated spaces. Trying to avoid the glares and snickers from Miley and Stacey.

"I dunno."

Stacey came over to join us.

"So, I hope you have a good lunch Selena."

She smiled sweetly and then went off to join Miley once again.

"What is she talking about?"

"God knows Tay! It's Stacey she's probably just trying to get me scared again."

"Yeah."

Miss Ryley walked in and I gave her my report.

"Okay class, today is running."

Everyone groaned, running was the worst thing ever to do in Pe.

"Enough groaning girls. Get outside and start running."

Me and Taylor ran out side-by-side along with the rest of the class.

"So Selena, what do you think will happen on Friday? Will she stay the night?"

It was okay to talk now because we were right at the back and everyone else was out of earshot.

"I don't know. I want her to."

"You dirty girl!"

"Not like that! Like I don't want to have sex yet, I'm not ready but we don't have to have sex."

"That's so sweet."

"Thanks."

"So do you really like her?" Taylor asked.

"Yeah, so much!"

"I take it she likes you as well then?"

"Yeah I hope so. We have kissed twice now."

"What?"

"Yeah. Once in detention and then once this morning."

"Oh my god! What sort of kiss?"

"Well, there was no tongue. It was just soft and slow. A perfect, innocent kiss. It would have got way more heated in detention though, if I hadn't of had to get Max."

"You little devil!"

We had already run quite far, and were out of breath. We decided that we would run the rest silently otherwise we would never finish. Talking completely took the air away.

The whole time we were running Stacey was such a bitch. She kept staring at me and smirking. I really did feel sick.

I ran to get changed as soon as we were finished. I wanted to get out and to music as soon as I could. I got my report, which I got an excellent in, and ran straight to Miss Thorton's room.

**2****ND**** LESSON - MUSIC**

"Hey Selena." Miss Thorton greeted.

"Hey."

I handed her my report.

"You going to perform your song this lesson?"

"Is it okay if I do it next lesson? It's just I'm feeling horrible and I feel like I need to express it through song?"

"Okay Selena."

"Thanks!"

I sat down in the corner just like I always do and got my rough book out. It didn't take the words long to form. It was all about Miley. I didn't like her anymore, my heart belonged to Demi. But I did miss her; we used to be so close!

_Did you forget,  
That I was even alive,  
Did you forget,  
Everything we ever had,  
Did you forget,  
Did you forget,  
About me._

She was saying and acting like I was a piece of dirt on the floor. Was the five years we spent as friends nothing to her?

_Did you regret,  
Ever standing by my side,  
Did you forget,  
What we were feeling inside,  
Now I'm left to forget,  
About us._

Did she regret ever being my friend? Were all the memories we had something she looked back on and wished had never happened?

_But somewhere we went wrong,  
We were once so strong,  
Our love is like a song,  
You can't forget it._

I can't forget everything that we went through. It meant so much to me, I cannot shift it from my memory.  
_  
__So now I guess,  
This is where we have to stand,  
Did you regret,  
Ever holding my hand,  
Never again,  
Please don't forget,  
Don't forget._

But it's all over now. I can't forget it still and I hope she doesn't.

That's all that I managed to get done in Music. If the lesson had been longer I would have done more. Usually I'd have stayed behind at break, but I didn't know what would happen at lunch so I wanted to spend my break with Demi.

I got my report off Miss Thorton.

"An excellent as always. Oh and Sel, I am so proud of you! You have done so much better in all your other lessons."

"Thanks miss."

I left and headed to Demi's room.

**BREAK**

I would have just barged into her room but there was someone in there so I knocked.

"Come in!"

I walked into her classroom and realised that it was Cameron in there.

"Hey miss, I just needed to ask you a question about the homework."

"Okay Selena. Cameron, are you all set?"

"Yes Miss, thanks."

"It's no problem."

It really pained me to see Demi talking to him normally! If only she knew.

As he passed me he got real close.

"See you at lunch."

I shot him a glare and then went to sit by Demi.

"What was that about?"

"Oh nothing. So how was last lesson?"

"For once Cameron wasn't a little shit. Neither was Steven."

"I wanted to hear about your lesson not theirs!"

I didn't mean to snap but I couldn't help it.

"Sel, what is wrong?"

"Nothing, okay! So I will have some spare time before work do you want me to come here?"

"Yeah okay."

"I'll look forward to it."

"Me too." She smiled.

"So what lesson did you have last?"

"It was maths. I am a maths teacher, Selena."

"Oh yeah."

It was getting sort of obvious now that something was up.

"Why are you being so weird? Is this about Steven and Cameron?"

"Stop fucking bringing them up! Look I have to go."

I could tell that she was shocked but I just ran out.

I wasn't looking where I was going and I ran straight into Milley and Stacey.

"What the fuck?" They exclaimed.

I looked up at them and they saw the tears in my eyes.

"Aww, what's up? Does the whore not want to wait until lunch?"

I barged past them and ran straight to English.

"Mr Friles, please can I sit in here?"

He was about to say no when he saw the tears in my eyes.

"Sure Selena."

I gave him my report card and then took my seat.

"Is there anything you want to talk about, dear?"

I can't believe I was such a dick to him. And he still cares!

"No thanks. But I'd like to say sorry. You know for being such a bitch."

"It's okay, I think you proved yourself last lesson."

He gave me a smile and then went on with his work.

It wasn't long until break was over and Taylor was sitting beside me.

**3****RD**** LESSON – ENGLISH**

"Okay class, carry on with the work from last lesson."

As soon as he'd finished speaking Taylor turned to me.

"Why are you crying?"

"Oh it's nothing."

"You don't cry for nothing."

"It's just Stacey and Miley and there bitchiness again."

Which technically wasn't a lie, they were definitely involved.

"Oh sorry. Just ignore them!"

"I'll try."

"Okay. So should we get on with our work?"

"Yeah, okay."

"So, you got any ideas?"

"Okay so it's about a lesbian Christian girl and an average lesbian girl together. It should start like:

_Two family's both with differences,_

_Yet so good friends,_

_Their fate comes to an end,_

_Though when they unite in a different way._

That's all I can think of."

"That is so good! You're amazing at writing!"

"Thanks, so what else is it about?"

"Well the lesbians and the Christian really."

"Okay, soooo…

_A lesbian Christian,_

_Finds love in her hopeless friend,_

_Will it tear these families apart,_

_And Maketh them fos?_

_But love should be equal,_

_But can it be this simple?"_

"You seriously have a gift!"

"Why thankyou."

We hadn't got anything else to write so we spent the rest of the lesson just drawing illustrations to go with it. The bell went and everyone started to leave.

"You wanna hang this lunch?"

"Sorry I can't."

"Why?" Taylor asked.

"I'm just busy."

I sped off, grabbing my report on the way and headed to the toilets, like Cameron had said.

**LUNCH**

I was scared! I was so close to just walking away but I knew those pictures would ruin me. I didn't want that reputation. So I went in.

As soon as I set foot in there I was pinned against the wall. I looked up and there was Miley and Stacey.

"Why hello whore!" Stacey smirked.

I stayed silent and just tried to appear confident.

"I guess you're just wondering why you're here? Well I'll tell you. Remember in year 5? Me and Taylor were the best of friends but then you came along and you took her! I was so lost back then and I needed Taylor. Then Miley came along and she was the perfect bait for you, wasn't she? All she had to do was pretend to be your friend and bam! I could get my revenge."

"What are you talking about?" I was so confused.

"I got Miley to pretend to be your friend. I sure had to wait a while to get the revenge I wanted but it's so worth it! So I made her get close to you. Make you trust her. Then she came onto you. I was around to snap the pictures. We always knew you were a desperate hoe so we got Steven to lure you in, and Cameron snapped that picture."

"No! Miley was my friend!"

"Where you Miles?" I yelled.

I looked over at Miley and she shook her head.

"Nope, it was all just part of the deal." She agreed.

I felt so defeated.

"So! You're going to do everything Cameron wants. Or the pictures go worldwide!" Stacey threatened.

"Yeah, but then everyone will think Miley is a lesbian!"

"No they won't. On the picture you're on top of her. We can easily cover this up! Face it, we got you."

I was trying my hardest not to cry but I just couldn't hold it in.

"I'm not doing this! Release the damn pictures I want to go!"

I went to walk about she just pulled me back and tightened her grip.

"No, it's too late now whore! You can have her Cameron!"

The two girls left barricading the door on their way out and then Cameron came out of a cubicle.

"Well, well."

And that's all he said. Throughout the whole thing, they're the only words he muttered.

He grabbed my face hard and forced me to kiss him. I was literally shaking. He didn't shed our clothes off or anything like that; he just did what he had to. He unzipped his shorts and boxers letting his member spring free. Then pulled my shorts down and pushed my underwear to the side, leaving my entrance uncovered. I thought that I was going to pass out from the pain, it was horrible! He was so rough and there was blood everywhere. The whole time I just wanted Demi! I wanted her to come and hold me and tell me everything was going to be okay. Because I needed that.

Cameron was just using me. I was just a body to him. One he could use to satisfy his needs and then just throw to the side and that's exactly what he did. He raped me, dropped me to the floor and then left.

As soon as he was gone I frantically put my underwear in place, pulled my shorts up and just cried!

**MISS LOVATO'S POV**

I was walking past the toilets, when I heard crying. It sounded bad, like real painful sobs. I ran in there and saw what I wasn't expecting. SELENA!

I ran to her side and sat beside her pulling her into me. She started to fight but when she saw it was me she relaxed.

"Demi!"

"Selena, what happened?"


	8. I don't date whores

**SELENA'S POV**

I couldn't tell her! No way! I couldn't tell anyone.

"It's just Stacey and Miley being bitches again."

"Are you sure because they never seem to get you this upset?"

"Yeah, they just really got to me. What if everything they're saying really is true? What if I am a whore?"

"You're not a whore!" Demi seemed certain.

"But what if I am?"

"You're not, simple as. Do you know why?"

"Why?"

"I don't date whores."

It's amazing how something that serious can happen and all it takes is Demi telling me that we're dating to cheer me up.

"We're dating?"

"Oh um, I thought so yeah. But not if you don't want to."

She started to panic; I think I must have given her the wrong impression.

"Oh no I want to! There's nothing I want more right now."

I pulled her in close and pressed our lips together. I didn't worry about anyone coming in; no one used these toilets anymore. I ran my tongue across her bottom lip begging for entrance, which she only too kindly granted. It wasn't rough. No! It was nothing like the kiss I had with Cameron. This was tasteful, soft, gentle and this time I actually wanted it.

We both pulled away for air and then we went back to the way we were before. Me lying in her arms and Demi stroking my hair.

"So what lesson do you have next, babe?" Demi asked.

Oh my god! The way she said babe.

"R.E."

And then I remembered, Steven.

"Shit! No please don't make me go to R.E! Please don't Demi! Please! Please!"

I started shaking uncontrollably and tears were pouring down my face once again.

"Shh. Shh. You don't have to go. You can stay with me."

"Thanks."

I tried to calm down but the tears just wouldn't stop flowing.

"Look, we'll stay here until you have calmed down and then we can go to my room."

"Is this your free period?"

"Yeah. It's only RE we can just send an email to your teacher telling her that I have a meeting with you about your mentor stuff."

"Yeah, okay."

"What's your teachers name?"

"Miss Opal."

"Okay, you ready to go?"

The tears had finally stopped and my shaking had subsided.

"Yeah, I'm good now."

Demi got up and then helped me to stand. She kept her hand on the small of my back, rubbing circles, the whole way there.

"Okay, take a seat next to my desk, sweetie."

I grabbed the chair I always sat on and put it beside Demi's desk and then we both sat down.

"So, how do you think work will be tonight?" Demi asked,

I knew she was trying to take my mind off everything and I was grateful.

"Umm I think it will be okay, but I want to go home afterschool and quickly have a shower or something, is that okay?"

I really needed to wash off all the blood, I felt so unclean! I could feel all his semen dripping down my legs and out of my opening. It was vile! I physically felt sick when I thought back on what had happened.

"Yeah that's fine babe." She smiled.

"I love it when you call me babe!"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Then babe, is what I shall call you."

She smiled at me and I gladly returned it.

"Good."

"So what are we doing tomorrow and Saturday then?"

"Decorating."

"Yeah I know that, but like what?"

"Okay, well we have to do all the rooms. My mom's is disgusting! It has stains on the floor which I have a rug to cover, it has alcohol and god knows what else all up the wall. I'm having her room and bed so I'm just going to take all the bedding off, throw it out and then flip the mattress."

"Yeah that would be a good idea, imagine all the things she's had on that bed!" Demi laughed.

"Ugh, I know! Anyway we then have to get rid of all the bottles and the fag ends and shit then vacuum it all. I'm putting all the furniture in my mom's old room, except for the bed, in my old room."

"How come?"

"Because we are using mine and Max's old rooms as guest rooms and they are both white. White paint and white carpet. The furniture in my mom's room is white but the room is red. And the furniture in my room is red, so I'll just swap it over."

"Aww, clever."

"Don't I know it. Then when I have done that, we'll paint over the walls with the red paint that I got and then just generally tidy it up and arrange it the way I want. That's probably all we'll get done on Friday. And then we have to do Max's on Saturday and the guest rooms. Oh and the locksmith will be round as well."

"Man, you're so organised!"

"I know yeah. I think that we might actually do the garden as well and get stuff for Max. The garden is fenced off so it's safe for him to be out there on his own. And it would give him more to do."

"That's a good idea."

"Thanks."

"And you're just like sixteen."

"Really?" I asked.

"What?"

"You're talking about me being so young when you're dating me?"

"I didn't mean it like that, it's just when I was sixteen I was not as mature as you."

"Yeah well that was AGES ago."

"Oi! I'm not that old!"

"24! You're getting on a bit now. Next year you'll be halfway to fifty!"

"Shut up, Sel!"

"Aww, is someone getting touchy about their age?"

"You are such a bitch!"

"But I'm your bitch."

"That you are babe. That you are!"

"So, you going home after mine tomorrow?"

"Are you asking me what I think you're asking me?"

"What do you think I'm asking you?"

"If I'll stop round tomorrow."

"Then yes, I am."

"I am not taking your virginity yet, Sel! It's too soon."

I knew that she was joking because she was laughing but she didn't understand the underlying effect that had on me. She was never going to be able to take my virginity now. Not after what Cameron did.

"No! I just meant to actually sleep, perv."

"Then yes. I would love to SLEEP at your house tomorrow." Demi joked.

"Good! Me, you and Max are going to have an awesome time."

"I really can't wait to meet him, he sounds so awesome and cute!"

"He definitely is! And he can't wait to meet you either."

"Aww, why?"

"He knows you are my princess."

"That's so cute but isn't it going to be awkward?"

"No. He's very mature for a four year old."

"Oh okay then, mature like his sister."

"Can I come off report now please?"

"That was random... Why?"

"Because I have got practically all excellents, even in Mr Friles class, and it's just annoying me now."

"Promise you'll carry on being good?" Demi asked.

"I promise."

"Then yes, you can."

"Thank you!"

"What's your next lesson?"

"Geography."

"Oh, who's that with?"

"Mrs Leavo."

"I don't even know who she is. What are you doing in class at the minute?"

"I don't know to be honest. But at least I am on my own in there."

"So you going to be okay?"

"Yeah. I'll text you later after work."

"Okay bye babe."

"Bye Dems."

I left her classroom and then headed to Geography.

**5****TH**** LESSON – GEOGRAPHY**

"Okay Class today we are doing about weather."

And that's all I heard of that lesson. Stacey sent me a text.

**St:So you even fuck boys to get out of trouble? You really are a whore.**

**Se:WTF?**

**St:Cameron told me how far you were willing to go.**

**Se:I didn't want to do any of that!**

**St:Yeah okay...**

**Se:I didn't! He fucking raped me!**

**St:No he never?**

**Se:Yes he did! And you let him! I knew you hated me but seriously?**

**St:We didn't know he was going to rape you. It's not our fault.**

**Se:Yeah it sort of is! All of this because I supposedly stole Taylor from you!**

**St:You did!**

**Se:No I didn't! Taylor came to me! I didn't even know you two were friends. If I could take it back so that I didn't have to be raped I would! I'd much rather have no friends and be a complete loser than go through what I did.**

**St:I didn't know he would do that**

**Se:I just need to know that it's over! That we're even and you're not going to do anything else to me! I've suffered enough.**

**St:Fine then, yeah. We're even.**

**Se:And you'll leave me alone at school?**

**St:Yeah.**

At least I knew it was going to continue. I may have had to be raped to get it to stop but at least it had stopped now.

"Okay class, the bell has gone, you may leave."

I hadn't paid attention to any of that lesson whatsoever. And now I had to get home, wash and change for work as quick as possible. So I ran home as fast as my legs would carry me.

I unlocked the door and ran straight to my room. My towels were on my bed where I always kept them. I grabbed them and ran to the shower.

As soon as I got into the bathroom I stripped all of my clothes and stepped into the warm spray of water cascading down from the shower head. I regretted it almost instantly. As the water hit my stomach and vagina it felt like I was being stabbed. I looked down and there was blood everywhere. My stomach had several cuts on it and bruises were clearly forming. There was dry blood running all down my thighs and my area was all puffy and swollen.

As soon as I took in the site below me I was physically sick. I opened the door to the shower and I was sick all over the floor. I didn't have time to clean it up and I didn't have time to have a proper wash. I just got all of the blood off me and then got out, careful not to stand in the sick. I felt really ill but I knew that I had to go to work to get money for Max and to pay for his after school club.

By the time I was dressed it was quarter to. I had five minutes to get to work. If I ran then I would make it. And that's exactly what I did and I got there on time.

**WORK**

"Oh hello, Selena was it?" My boss asked.

"Yes."

"Okay, you're working till six fifty aren't you?"

"Yeah I am."

"Okay then, do you want to start by washing up?"

"Yeah, okay."

I was washing up for two hours! Two fucking hours spent washing plates, cups, cutlery, and all sorts of crap. Once I was done washing he got me working on the tables and taking orders. I had to clean the tables once people left, and then I had to take the orders when people arrived. I much preferred that to washing up. The time went by so fast and soon the three hours were up.

"Okay Selena, you did a great job! Here's your twelve quid."

"Thanks, sir. I'll see you tomorrow."

I left and then started the ten minute walk to Max's school. I pocketed 9 pounds and then kept the other three in my hand ready to pay.

"Hey Maxy."

He ran up to me and gave me a big hug.

"Hey Lena!"

He grabbed a hold of my hand and then we went to sign him out and pay. Then we left.

"What do you want for tea, Max?"

"Umm… Can I have pizza?"

"Yeah sure. When we get home go up and change but don't go in the bathroom!"

"Why?"

"Because there's something I have to clean up in there first."

"What?"

"That doesn't matter, just don't go in there. Okay?"

"Okay."

I went up to the bathroom and cleaned the sick up. It was really disgusting and vile! I just used toilet roll to get it up and then flushed the tissue down the toilet. I then grabbed a flannel, soaked with water, and scrubbed at the floor. I finished it off with disinfectant and then put the flannel in the wash.

I cleaned my hands and then went to check if Max was ready.

"You ready now buddy?"

"Yes."

"Okay, come down and watch TV while I do dinner."

He got up and then we both approached the stairs.

"Okay because you have been a good boy, I think I'm going to let you watch… wait for it… SIMPSONS!" I happily told him.

"Yay!"

His whole face lit up and he ran down the stairs faster than I have ever seen him before. I got him settled on the sofa and then put the tv on.

"What pizza do you want?"

"Pepperoni, please."

"One pepperoni, coming right up."

I put the pizza in the oven and then went upstairs quickly to put the nine pounds somewhere safe then I went back downstairs and sat with Max. I felt my phone buzz and got it out my pocket.

**D:How was work, babe?xxx**

**S:It was okay. Three hours of cleaning, but it pays the bills xxx**

**D:Ha ha! You sound so old, talking like that xx**

**S:Well you know. So what are you doing right now?xxx**

**D:Sitting in bed naked… what about you?xxx**

**S:Is this your attempt at sexy talk?xxx**

**D:Yeah but I don't think it's working. I'm actually just watching tv and eating my dinner. What about you?xxx**

**S:Watching the simpsons with Max while we wait for his pizza to cook xxx**

Just as I said that the oven timer went off. I grabbed his pizza and put it on a plate.

"Are you going to come and eat over here or are you staying there?"

"Can I stay here, please?"

"Sure buddy."

I brought the pizza over to him and sat beside him once again.

**D:You really are the sweetest sister!xxx**

**S:I do try;)xxx**

**D:So what time does he go to bed?xxx**

**S:He'll go after his pizza xxx**

**D:So you're free to talk then?xxx**

**S:I'm free to talk now?xxx**

**D:Yeah but you can talk in any way you want?xxx**

I was getting low on texts so I decided to just ring her.

D: "Hello?"

S: "Hey, I was getting low on my texts."

M: "Who are you talking to Lena?"

D: "Aww, is that Max?"

S: "Yeah."

M: "Is it your princess?"

S: "Yes it is Maxy."

M: "Can I talk to her?"

S: "One sec, bud."

S: "Hey Dems, Max wants to talk to you?"

D:"Oh okay."

I passed Max the phone.

S: "Careful Maxy."

M: "I will."

M: "Hello, are you Lena's Princess?"

D: "Yeah I guess I am."

M: "Hello, I'm her brother Max."

D: "Hi Max."

M: "I have to look after Lena because my dad has gone and now I'm the man of the house."

I couldn't help but giggle at that.

D: "Oh okay then Max."

M: "So you have to be nice to Lena or I will have to get mad."

D: "Okay, I promise I'll be nice."

M: "Good. I can't wait to meet you tomorrow."

D: "I can't wait to meet you either!"

M: "Bye."

D: "Bye."

He handed the phone back to me.

D: "Selena, that was so cute!"

S: "I know yeah, I do love him."

I noticed that Max had finished his tea so I grabbed his plate and put it in the sink.

D: "So what you doing?"

S: "Just about to get Max into bed, one second."

S: "Max come on go brush your teeth and then get in bed. I'll be upstairs to tuck you in, in five minutes."

M: "Okay."

He ran up the stairs and I continued with my conversation.

S: "So Dems, I can't wait for tomorrow."

D: "Same, I get to spend some time with my girl out of school."

S: "Yep and we can do whatever we want."

D: "Well within reason."

S: "Yeah obviously."

D: "Selena, are you sure that you're okay?"

I hated lying to her.

S: "Yeah, I'm fine just a bit tired is all."

D: "Oh, okay. Well I'll go then. I'll see you tomorrow, babe. Byeee."

S: "Bye."

Truth is, I'm not fine. I can't stop thinking about Cameron and the rape. I feel so dirty and un-clean! I feel like absolute shit! I want it to stop? But it just won't!

**PLEASE REVIEW!:) AND ANSWER THE QUESTIONS I ASKED IN THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER PLEASE IT WOULD MEAN A LOT. ALSO READ '**_Demena – Nerd'_** S FANFICTION: '**_Just My Luck.' _**THANKS EVERYONE!:')**


	9. Structure

A/N – THANKS FOR ALL THE REVIEWS.

**FRIDAY**

I woke up and Max was still asleep, I decided to go and get in the shower, so I grabbed my towels and the clothes I would wear that day. The water still stung as it splashed on my body but it wasn't as bad as it was yesterday. The bruising could be seen much clearer and it hurt if you put any sort of pressure anywhere on my stomach or lower. The swelling had gone down quite a bit though.

As soon as I stepped out of the shower the cold air hit my body causing me to shiver. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and I really was a state. I caught glimpses of bruises that I hadn't seen yesterday forming all over my body.

It was weird though. Those two words: 'well, well.' Kept replaying in my mind over and over and over! They wouldn't shift. I wasn't feeling good at all! I have to feel alright for Max! I can't let on to Demi that anything's wrong either because I don't want her to find out. I don't want anyone to find out.

I don't want it to be made into a big deal! I think I can cope with it now but if the police were involved and stuff like that, then I really wouldn't cope!

I went into Max's room. He was being really lazy and just wouldn't wake up.

"Max! Up! Now!"

"Hmm… I'm tired!"

"I don't care buddy, you got to get up. You're normally a good boy. Don't ruin that now. I'm going to go downstairs and do you some breakfast. You better be down and dressed in a bit!"

I left him in bed and went downstairs to do two bowls of cocopops.

I had just finished making them when Max came running down.

"I'm here! I'm here! I'm still a good boy!"

Too cute!

"I know you are Max. I'm proud of you. Eat up."

I sat down beside him and we started to devour the food. I was starving. I hadn't had any tea last night that's probably why.

"So, I was thinking that maybe we could get some stuff for the garden Bud?" I suggested.

"What sort of stuff?"

I could see the clear excitement covering his face.

"A wooden playhouse, a swing, a see-saw, a trampoline just stuff like that. We could get you your own little playground."

"Yes! Please! Please! Please!"

"I take it you'd like that."

"Yes!"

"Then we will do it. Either tomorrow or Sunday."

"Tomorrow!"

"I don't know Max. We have to finish the house first and then tidy the entire garden up before we can get the stuff."

"Okay, Lena."

"But we definitely will get it."

He smiled sweetly at me. See these are the reasons I can't stay down and upset about the events prior to today because I have to be strong for Max. If he saw me sad then he'd become sad and I don't want to ruin his mood! Ever since Mom, Dad and Justin left he's been unbelievably happy.

"Okay, get your teeth brushed and grab your bag, I'll do the lunch." I said.

Like every day I made me and Max some sandwiches, got us some crisps, a chocolate bar, some fruit and then a drink. We packed it all away in our bags and then did the checklist.

"We have everything, so we can go." Max smiled.

"Okay then."

I locked the door behind us and then we set off in the direction to Max's school.

"I'm going to be fetching you at seven again Max. Then Demi is coming over at quarter past 7."

"I'm so excited for tonight!"

"I know bud. Me too."

I walked Max up to the gate at his school and then set off to my school.

By the time I got there, I was like five minutes late because I got cramps in my stomach and had to stop for a bit.

**TUTOR**

"Sorry I was late miss." I apologised as I walked in.

"It's alright, take your seat."

I smiled quickly in her direction and then sat by Taylor.

"You disappeared yesterday at lunch without telling me why and then you weren't in RE?"

"Yeah I'm sorry. I went to the toilets but then Stacey and Miley were there. They were complete bitches and I sort of broke down crying and then Miss Lovato found me and brought me here."

"Ohh. I'm sorry. I guess that's why they seemed so smug."

Considering what really happened it sickened me to think they looked smug.

"Yeah, they're just bitches. Anyway how was your night?"

"It was okay. Eddie came round."

"Ohhh! Did you guys do anything?"

"No. We just sat around and hung out."

"Maybe he's not just in it for the sex then."

Just talking about sex was making me feel sick but I didn't want to be a bad friend and not ask.

"I know that's what I was thinking."

"So what's the problem?"

"I just don't know if I like him as much as I used to."

"Well if you're not sure then just hang around with him a bit more and you will soon know."

"Kay, thanks Sel.

"It's no problem."

"So what do you think Stacey is going to say in Biology?"

I didn't want to talk about Stacey at all! I needed to think about anything over than those four twats!

"She won't say anything. De-I mean Miss Lovato spoke to her so she'll leave me now."

"You nearly called her Demi, are you guys getting serious?"

Subject change! Thank god.

"We've been dating like two days and I don't want to talk about that now. Anyone could hear."

"Okay, sorry."

"Mmm…"

The bell went and everyone got up to leave. I went up to Demi first.

"I'll see you at break, kay?"

"Yeah babe, hope your first two lessons go okay."

We both smiled and then I went back to Taylor at the doorway.

**1****ST**** LESSON – BIOLOGY**

Me and Taylor were sitting in our seats waiting for everyone else to join. We were one of the first in the class for once.

"So what do you reckon we'll be doing this lesson?"

"Don't know."

We just sat there waiting for everyone else to turn up. Stacey and Miley came wondering in and didn't even glance in our direction.

"Okay class, today we're looking at how to keep a balanced diet," Mr Rayle explained, grabbing everyone's attention, "there are books out on every desk. Turn to page 99, make a poster about the different food groups; carbohydrates, fats and so on, in your pairs, on the A3 sheet."

I turned to Taylor and we both smiled.

"Book work again." She beamed.

"This lesson is gonna be a doddle."

Me and Tay loved it when we got set book work or we were just given worksheets, it meant we could talk a lot more.

"How's Max doing?"

"He's doing good thanks. I think he's a lot happier with it just being me and him."

"Yeah, I think I have to agree with him. Most people need a mom and dad but you I don't know. You just, you know how to look after Max, you are his mom in a way."

"I get what you mean. I will always look out for Max. As soon as I turn 18 he will be my responsibility legally and until then he still is, just not from where the law stands."

"Yeah and you have 'you know who', to help you now."

"We can't just keep referring to her as 'you know who.'"

"Okay, we have to come up with a codename then."

"Like what?"

"Like, Sarah or Lisa. No wait I have it, STRUCTURE!"

"What the fuck? Where did structure come from?"

"I don't know. It just popped into my head. And no one would guess who we were talking about if we called her structure."

"Okay then, Taylor. Structure it is."

"Whoop! So anyway, you have structure to help you now."

"Yeah I do. You know, I really like her. I could see us going somewhere."

"Yes. I imagine that you two would be very good together."

"Well maybe when and if we get serious, you can come over to mine when she's there and you can just chill with us."

"Oh my gosh! Yes! I want to do that."

"It's a plan."

We stopped talking for a while so that we could actually get some work done. I don't mean to brag but our poster was the bomb! It had all the information anyone would ever need about healthy diets.

"What colour should the teeth be?" Taylor asked me.

"Did you really just ask me that question?"

"Yes. I did."

"Well… What colour do you think they should be dummy?"

"Oi! I meant like are we making them healthy or unhealthy."

"Well it's a poster about HEALTHY eating."

"Yeah but we could do them yellow to show how bad it can get."

"True. It's your choice."

"Well, I shall do them yellow and then have a cool speech bubble saying: 'You have to eat healthily otherwise your teeth will turn out like mine!'"

"Okay, you do that."

Sometimes Taylor got a bit too enthusiastic in our school work. I guess that's a good thing though because whenever I got paired with her we always got an A.

The bell went signalling the end of the lesson.

"Okay class, I'll see you next week."

"Selena, what lesson do we have next?"

"We have, English."

"Oh I heard Mr Friles is off ill."

"So we'll have a cover?"

"Yep."

"Ohh. I wonder who?"

My question was soon answered when we arrived at the classroom.

**2****ND**** LESSON – ENGLISH**

Our teacher for that lesson was Mr Miles. The worst teacher in the entire school. He's like ancient, I swear he should be retiring soon.

"Oh great Tay. So this is going to be fun."

"No talking girls! Or I will send you out!" He boomed!

I think my ear drums have burst. Like seriously, what is his issue?

"Sit down in your seats immediately and read 'Romeo and Juliet!'"

Really? That's what we were going to do, for the whole lesson!

"If there is any talking you will be sent out the classroom and you will stay in at break!"

There was certainly no talking after that warning. No one wanted to stay in with him at break so no one dared talk. But it's safe to say that was the most boring lesson I have ever, in the history of my life, been in. No joke! Finally the bell went and we couldn't get out of there quick enough.

"Where you going now then?"

"I'm going to Structure's room."

"Oh."

I could tell Taylor was disappointed. I guess I have been blowing her off lately.

"Do you want to come?"

Her face lit up straight away.

"Yes."

We carried on the walk to Demi's room and then I went in and sat beside her as always.

"Hey Dems."

"Hey Sel. Umm… Taylor." Demi said.

It seemed to be awkward but I didn't get why.

"Okay, well you to are acting very awkward."

"Selena, should I just go." Taylor asked.

"No don't be stupid, come here."

Taylor walked over to me and I pulled her so that she was sitting on my lap. We always used to sit like that before and I missed it.

"How come I don't get to sit on your lap?" Demi moaned.

I looked over at her and she was pouting. Damn she's beautiful! I'm the luckiest girl in the world.

"Because, we are at school and if anyone where to walk in and you were sitting on my lap it would be a little weird."

Me and Taylor started to laugh.

"Fine but tonight I shall be sitting on your lap."

She winked at me and Taylor began to blush.

"Okay people. Ever heard of too much information?" Taylor complained.

"Sorry." We both said simultaneously.

We settled into a comfortable stream of chatter. Talking about anything and everything. Like how long have me and Taylor been friends? Which was a question that I dreaded. That was the whole fucking reason surrounding my rape. How long do you think me and Demi will last? What exactly are we planning on doing tonight? Taylor did not appreciate the answer to the last one.

Sadly the bell did ring and we had to vacate to our seats.

**3****RD**** LESSON – MATHS**

"Okay class today we are looking at fractions. The questions up on the board are the starter questions. When you have done them, put your hand up and I shall bring you the main sheet."

Man my baby did look good up there all official and professional.

"Sel? Sel? Selena!"

I had been so caught up in checking Demi out that I hadn't noticed Taylor calling me.

"Huh? What?"

"Someone was checking structure out!"

"Yes okay I was. Now what?"

"I was just going to ask what you got for one?"

"Well I haven't done one yet."

"Okay."

"But let's have a look. 75% of 115, so 50% is 57.5, 20% is 23, 5% is 5.75. Add that all together and you get 86.25. I think that's the right answer."

"Well that's what I got so yeah I guess."

We carried on working out the rest of the starter problems. Due to my constant staring problem, we finished them last. I put my hand up and waited for Demi to come over.

"Took you a while didn't it?" Demi smirked.

"Yes. Sorry but someone was distracting me."

"Oh really? Who?"

"Structure."

"Huh?"

Demi's face made me and Taylor both laugh. She was so confused.

"Who is structure?" Demi asked.

"You are babes."

"I am so confused right now!" She laughed.

"Well basically. If me and Taylor want to talk about you in public we use the codename structure so that no one knows who we're talking about." I explained.

"Isn't my baby clever. Now get on with this worksheet."

Her demanding tone didn't faze me, I knew she was just joking. She winked subtly and then went back to her desk.

"You two are just perf." Taylor admired.

"I know."

We both got on with the work after that. If my girlfriend wanted me to do the sheet then I would do that sheet!

It took the rest of the lesson to complete it but eventually it was done.

"Okay class, you may all go now. See you next lesson." Demi announced.

Everyone got up and left.

**LUNCH**

"So Selena, I will see you at quarter past seven, yeah?" Demi asked.

"Yeah, definitely babe. I can't wait till tonight."

"You know how you said you liked it when I called you babe? Well it's even sexier from you."

"I doubt it, but I'll take the compliment."

"Bye."

"Bye."

Me and Demi just sort of gazed into each other's eyes and then I left with Taylor.

"So Selena, you wanna eat outside again?"

"I sort of want to be on my own now?"

"Oh, okay, I guess I'll see you in PE then."

I said bye to Taylor and then wondered off. I didn't really know where I was going but I just wanted to be alone.

I was just casually walking the corridors and I ended up back at the S block toilets. It was a stupid place to go and I don't know why I went because as soon as I set foot through the door, I broke down. The whole ordeal played over in my head, every second of it, every detail. The way it felt when he kissed me, the way I was pushed up against the wall, the disgusting feeling I got when he took my innocence. I fell down, curling into the exact same position I had the day before.

I just wanted to give up, I wanted everything to end. One minute I felt so strong and the next I was completely weak. Could I get through this? Would I get better? I don't know the answer. I don't know what to do!

**A/N KAY SO THAT'S IT FOR THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE REVIEW :)**


	10. I'm falling for her

I stayed on the bathroom floor, in pieces until the end of lunch. I washed my face and reapplied my make-up so that no one would be able to see I had been crying. I didn't want to go to PE at all! Stacey and Miley would both be there and I was so sore!

**4TH LESSON PE**

"Alright! So today, we are all playing dodge ball." Miss Ryley yelled.

Shit! Dodge ball really? There was no way I could do it.

"Umm miss?"

"Yes Selena?"

"I am feeling really sick, so can I not do this?"

"Selena get changed."

I nearly lost all control when she uttered those three words. I wanted to just run, cry! Anything but obey her orders. But I didn't want to draw attention to myself.

"Okay then Class!" Miss Ryley boomed.

She placed the rack of balls to the side of the court and then proceeded to count us in. Taylor was on my team so maybe she could protect me.

"1…2…3…4…5…Go!"

As soon as she yelled go everyone grabbed the balls and it was like world war 3. I tried to stay to the sides and just not get involved but that didn't work, no. Because I had people out to get me. Stupid, twats that wanted to ruin me. It was Miley this time, she threw a ball right at my stomach.

As soon as it hit me I literally fell to the ground clutching myself in agony. I swear I have never been in so much pain before. Everyone thought I was over exaggerating, they would though! They didn't know that I'd been raped.

Miss Ryley pushed her way through everyone that was crowded round and bent down beside me.

"Come on Selena, man up!"

I just carried on crying and didn't even attempt to speak or get up.

"Look, it probably hasn't even marked you."

She grabbed the hem of my shirt, and I tried to stop her but it was too late.

"Selena!" She cried.

The whole PE room was now staring at me. The bright, yellow and grey bruises clearly visible along with all the cuts. I looked up at Miley and saw pure guilt written all over her face, she knew how I had become so battered. Then I turned to Taylor and just saw hurt and confusion.

I yanked my shirt down and jumped up which was clearly a stupid idea, I immediately fell back down grabbing my stomach in pain once again.

"Right okay, Miley this is your mess! Help her out and take her to her form teacher. I think Miss Lovato has a free lesson now." Miss Ryley calmly ordered.

Everyone else stood back and Miley came forward. I couldn't walk or stand right now, and she knew that. So she picked me up. Having her touching me, made me feel sick.

"Miley put me fucking down!"

"No!"

"What the fuck!"

"You can't walk anyway and I'm pretty sure you just want your girlfriend now, right?"

"I don't have a girlfriend!"

"Yes you do! Miss Lovato!"

"No I don't!"

"I saw you together, on the tape!"

"What the fuck?"

I couldn't hold it anymore, tears streamed down my face.

"I mean. I – I – Look it's not what it sounds like!"

"Put me down!"

"I didn't know that he was going to do that! We thought he'd just get what Steven did! I didn't want to do it really!"

"Miley put me down!"

"Selena, please! I'm so sorry!"

"You are one sick bitch! Don't fucking try your apologies with me! Go die!"

With all the strength, that I could muster, I kicked her shin. It must have hurt her because she dropped me and coiled in pain. I guess it wasn't the best of ideas because now I was even worse after being dropped.

I wasn't thinking about the pain though! I just laid down and cried.

Someone tried to pick me up and I panicked. I freaked, I thrashed my legs and arms! And just screamed!

"What the fuck did you do to her Miley?" Demi yelled.

"I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!"

Soon Miss Ryley was stood with us as well I guess she heard the screams.

"It's okay, I've got her." Demi said.

Miss Ryley just nodded and walked back inside.

"Miss, I am sorry." Miley started.

"Just fuck off before I do something I regret."

Miley ran off back to the PE room, I think she was crying but I didn't care. Demi knelt down so she was at the same level as me and began to stroke my hair and this time I let her touch me.

"Selena, my baby. What happened?"

She picked me up, just like Miley had. I settled into her, enjoying the fact that I wasn't alone and that Miley was gone!

She carried me back to her classroom and then laid me down on one of the desks. She saw me clutching my belly and pulled my top up carefully. I was fed up of fighting people away so I just let her do it.

She took one look at my stomach and she began to cry.

"Selena!" She whispered.

"It's nothing Demi, I'm fine."

"Don't fucking try that! What happened?"

She was so mad right now! Like she was shaking, I would not want to be on the wrong side of her.

I didn't know whether to be honoured that she wanted to protect me or scared that I was going to have to tell her something.

"Was it that fucking twat Stacey and the wannabe Barbie, Miley?" She spat.

It was easier to just agree.

"Yeah, it was."

"I am going to kill them!"

"Demi, no! You can't! Please no! Demi Please!"

I started crying once again.

"Sh, sh, sh, calm down Sel please!."

"Demi, you can't do anything!"

"They can't get away with this!"

I stayed quiet after that, silently sobbing and looking at the floor.

"I'm so worried, Sel. I swear there's something going on, that you refuse to tell me. I have only known you five days and yet I can tell that you're different, just tell me!" Demi pleaded.

"I'm fine Dems, I swear. I'm just finding it a bit hard right now."

"I'm here for you, Sel. When ever you need me, I'm here. Just a text or phone call away. You're never going to be on your own!" Demi promised.

"I know you are and I know that I'm not on my own!"

"Good! Cause I really like you!"

"I really like you too." I smiled.

Demi leaned forward and planted a kiss on my lips. Such a simple action can keep you from breaking.

"Do you want to attempt your next lesson or not babe? You can stay here?"

"No, I have to go."

Demi grabbed a hold of my hand and carefully I sat up and slipped off the table. It hurt like fucking hell when I touched the floor but I just ignored the pain.

"I think I can walk but not on my own, right now."

"That's fine. I'll walk you to your next lesson, where is it?"

"Drama."

"Okay then."

I put my arm around her shoulder and she put her arm around my waist. We walked to the drama room slowly and it took us about five minutes.

"I'll see you tonight, Dems."

"Yeah." She said.

We smiled and then I hobbled into the classroom. As soon as Taylor saw me, she ran over to help.

**5****TH**** LESSON - DRAMA**

"Oh my god! Are you okay, Sel?"

"I wish everyone would stop fucking ask!"

"Aww Selena, you're here. Well you and Taylor can just work on reading this script." I knew there was a reason I liked Miss Riles.

"Thanks Miss."

I limped over to the place where Taylor was sitting.

"I'm sorry but I was worried!"

"Well worry less! Can we just do the work?"

"Fine."

"Thankyou!"

We started on the script and it took us all of the lesson to finish.

I found that I wasn't limping as much by the time Drama was over, I still needed a bit of help now but I should be fine for after work. As I limped out of the classroom I found Demi waiting for me.

"I'm going to drive you to work, babe!"

"You don't have to do that!"

"I want to."

"Oh okay."

We mirrored are actions from before while she helped me to her car. The two minute drive was silent but not awkward. As soon as we arrived she gave me a kiss on the cheek.

"I'll see you tonight Sel."

"Yeah, I'll see you."

I got out of the car and cautiously walked up to the doors.

"Hello, Selena." My boss greeted.

"Hey sir. Um do you think that I could just do washing up for this shift as I have injured myself and I'm not very good at walking."

He could tell that I wasn't lying as he had seen me limping towards the café.

"Sure thing. Don't you walk to fetch your brother after?"

"Umm yeah."

"Do you want to leave early so that you can get there in time?"

"Yeah, sure. If that's okay?"

"Course it is. You did so well yesterday. You can wash up for the whole time and you can leave at twenty to, instead of ten to."

"Thanks so much sir."

"It's okay."

I went to the kitchen and I spent my three hour shift, well two hours and forty-five minute shift, washing up. It was sort of boring but I was very appreciative. By the time the shift was over my stomach was hurting a lot less and it was much easier to walk.

"Your shift is over now Selena. Here is your £12 pound and you did very well today." My boss praised.

"Thanks sir."

Just like I did yesterday, I pocketed £9 of it and kept the £3 in my hand.

I got to Max's school at like five to.

"Lena!"

He ran up and hugged me, it hurt quite a bit, but I didn't have the heart to tell him that.

"Hey Maxy, how was school?"

"It was so fun!"

"I'm glad to hear it, are you ready to go?"

"Yeah!"

I went and paid the woman whilst signing Max out and then we left.

The five minute walk, made ten because of my stomach, was pretty much filled with the random talk of little Max. I did love that boy!

As soon as we got back I unlocked the door and sent him up to get changed. And then I texted Demi.

**S:Hey Dems, do you want me to do you some tea or are you eating at yours?xxx**

**D:I have already eaten babes:)xxx**

**S:Oh okay. I'll see you soon. xxx**

**D:Bye xxx**

By the time I was finished texting Max was back downstairs.

"What do you want for tea?"

"What are you having, Lena?"

"I'm not hungry."

"Oh, then I don't want any."

"Max, that's not a choice for you. What do you want?"

"Fine! I'll have noodles."

"Okay and don't use that tone, I'm not in the mood."

"I'm sorry, Lena."

I ignored his apology and then went to make his dinner. I felt bad taking it out on him but I was just so fed up. Max was halfway through his noodles when there was a knock at the door.

I knew it was Demi so I squealed and rushed to the door. She was the only one that actually cheered me up.

I pulled her into the house and then brought her into a soft and careful hug.

"Someone's happy to see me." Demi joked.

"When am I ever not happy to see you?"

"Touché."

Max had put his noodles down on the table and joined us by the door.

"Selena, is this your princess Demi?" He asked.

"It sure is buddy."

Max smiled and then turned to Demi, he held out his hand for her to shake. While I just watched in awe.

"Hello Demi, my name's Max."

She shook his hand and her face was matching the look of awe on my own.

"Hey Max, nice to meet you."

He ran off afterwards blushing. I think he got a bit shy.

"So babe, do you want to start right away?" She questioned.

"Yeah sure. I'll just get the stuff."

I grabbed all the cloths and cleaning products I had laid out and then got plenty of plastic bags.

"Max, stay down here and watch telly for a bit, okay?"

"Yes, Lena."

"Good boy."

I took Demi up to my mom's room and she actually gasped when she saw it.

"Man, she was a messy woman!"

"Tell me about it Dems."

"Okay, well sit on the bed."

"What?"

"You are not standing with your stomach, sit on the bed."

"No!"

She didn't really let me argue, she picked me up and placed me on the bed.

"That's where you shall stay."

I was actually quite thankful to be honest.

"Here Selena, you strip the bed and clean the bedside tables. That way you don't have to move. I'll get all these bottles up."

"Alright."

We both set off to work. It was so boring but our constant flirting and banter made it bearable. I took all the sheets off the bed, and threw them in a pile outside the door. I then emptied both ashtrays and threw them in the bin. The bedside tables were so hard to clean. But eventually I managed it. Whilst I had been doing that Demi had picked up all the bottles off the floor, all the fag ends and all the other random crap my mom had left and thrown it in the bin.

"Okay so, I have been on the bed the whole two hours we have just tidied so now I can help?" I reasoned.

"I guess. But you should get your brother up here, he's probably lonely."

"I will do, MAX!"

Max came running into the room.

"Yes?"

"Do you want to help us now?"

"Oh thank god, Yes!"

I laughed at his antics and then we got to work. We had to move all of the furniture in my mom's old room, minus the bed and bedside tables, into my old room.

"Lena, can I vacuum?"

"Course you can Maxy!"

Demi plugged it in and got it all set up to save me from having to do any bending over and then we went back to my old room, leaving Max to do what he wanted.

As soon as we got into the room Demi pulled me close. It didn't even hurt anymore, the aching was easing and I wasn't in pain. She tangled her hands in my hair and pulled my head closer to her own. Our lips just inches apart.

"Kiss me." I murmured.

And that's exactly what she did. Our lips came crashing together and I was lost in the ecstasy of the moment. I was so caught up in it all that I hadn't noticed the vacuum turn off, I don't think Demi had either. Not until we heard the clearing of Max's throat.

"I don't mean to disturb the kiss but I have finished." Max teased.

I picked him up and spun him round, holding him close once I was finished.

"I love you so much buddy!"

Max is my world, It's sad that he couldn't cheer me up and Demi could, but that's just how it was.

"I love you too Lena!"

I placed him back on the ground and then we all went back into my new room, grabbing the paint and brushes on our way.

We pushed the bed and bedside tables into the middle of the room so that we wouldn't get any paint on it and then we began. It was so much fun. We didn't take it seriously; I mean we were only painting the wall. It did take us about an hour to finish, and that was just the first coat.

"Okay so we're going to have to wait for this to dry now. Max it's already eleven o'clock, do you want to go to sleep?"

"No Lena! I want to stay with you too!"

"Okay then buddy, just this once you can stay up."

We all went downstairs to watch a movie. We chose to watch 'Wizards of Waverly Place: The Movie' as I knew it was one of Max's favourite. I was sat on Demi's lap, snuggled closely into her and Max was sat beside us, buried in Demi's side.

For once my mind wasn't on what Cameron had done to me. It was just purely focused on Demi and Max. Focused on how happy I was in that moment.

It was half twelve by the time the movie was over. We went back upstairs and gave the room one last coat; it wasn't as thick this time so it would only need a half hour to dry. We decided that while we waited we'd make the bed and move the furniture that I used to have into the hallway ready.

Max and Demi got the furniture and I did the bed. I made a right mess of it; I've never been good at making beds. It took me twenty minutes! The other two had already got all the furniture ready before I had finished.

I went to get the rug and left Demi and Max in the room. When I got back I was warmed by the site I saw. Max was lying down on the bed and Demi was on top tickling him.

"HA HA! Demi!"

"What do you say Maxy?"

"Demi is better than Lena!"

"Excuse me Max! I'm going to cry now!" I mocked.

"Aww baby, don't worry. We all know it's true."

I ran and jumped on Demi, pinning her to the bed. By this time Max was standing by the wall cheering. It really hurt when I jumped on her but I didn't want to let it show.

I was tickling her just like she had been to Max.

"What do you say Demi?"

"Lena is better than Demi!"

"That's better."

I stopped tickling her and instead leaned down to capture her lips. It was sadly broken when Max made me jump.

"The walls are dry!"

I literally jumped. No joke, I nearly fell off the bed but Demi caught me.

"Jeesh Max! Why so loud?"

"I don't know."

He started to chuckle which just made us all laugh even more.

It was two o'clock by the time my room was done. The walls were painted, the floor was cleaned, the stains were covered, and the bed was clean. Everything in the room was clean. You could hardly recognise it as the room my mom once occupied.

We were all tucked up in my bed. When I say all I mean Max as well. He didn't want to sleep on his own, he wanted to sleep in with me and Demi. Demi was alright with it so I let him.

I'm pretty sure I'm falling for Demi. She's beautiful, kind, sweet and she gets along well with Max. Like she will include him, I needed someone in my life that realises Max comes first, and she did.

**DEMI'S POV**

I'm pretty sure I'm falling for Selena. She's beautiful, kind, sweet and she's an amazing sister. She needs someone who releases that Max comes first and trust me I know that. Besides Max is so adorable.


	11. It was just a dream

A/N SORRY THAT I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A WHILE BUT I'VE BEEN SO BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND STUFF AND I JUST HAVEN'T HAD THE TIME. IF YOU'VE HAD EMAILS OR STUFF SAYING THAT I'VE UPDATED WHEN I HAVEN'T THAT'S JUST BECAUSE I WAS FIXING ANY MISTAKES IN MY PREVIOUS CHAPTERS. I LOVE THIS STORY AND I WANT IT TO BE PERFECT SO I'VE MADE A FEW CHANGES IN THE CHAPTERS BEOFRE. SELENA TRIED TO GET AWAY NOW BEFORE SHE WAS RAPED BUT STACEY GRABBED HER AND PULLED HER BACK. SHE IS NOW NOT COPING VERY WELL AT ALL WITH THE RAPE. STACEY NOW DIDN'T KNOW THAT SHE WOULD BE RAPED AND FEELS GUILTY, AS DOES MILEY. DEMI IS NOW GETTING VERY SUSPICIOUS ABOUT IT ALL AS WELL. SORRY FOR ANY INCONVINENCE WITH CHANGING CHAPTERS.

_**SATURDAY – Demi's POV**_

I woke up and the events of the past days flashed in my head. I was seriously worried about Sel! There was something going on that she wasn't telling me but I just didn't want to push it.

I thought back to last night though and it eased me. There was a big face eating grin covering my face which refused to move. I looked around and noticed that Max wasn't there. I guess he had woken up and gone in his room or downstairs. My adorable girl was fast asleep, right beside me. It was ten o'clock so I decided it was time for her to wake.

I carefully and quietly manoeuvred myself so that I was directly on top of Selena, straddling her. She still hadn't woken up, which was good. I was planning on waking her with a kiss. Cheesy, I know. But I was doing it anyway! I leaned down and caught her bottom lip between my two, gently and teasingly I tugged her lip and then carried on with the kiss. It was obviously the stupidest thing I've ever done though, she flipped and I ended up on the floor.

**SELENA'S POV**

_Cameron was kissing me and I felt his lips on mine. I flipped out thrashing around and trying my best to get him off me. He was straddling me and I didn't want him to._

I was awoken by a loud bang. I jumped up and began to cry. Demi was off the bed clutching her arm.

"Babe, it was just me." She soothed but I could tell she was close to tears.

"I'm so sorry! I was having a nightmare!"

"It's okay. What is going on though?"

"Nothing I swear! Come here."

I pulled her up off the bed and into my arms, kissing her with passion.

"Mmm… You taste so good! I could really get used to this." I smiled.

**DEMI'S POV**

I could definitely tell that something had happened but I decided to drop it for now.

"I could get used to this as well!" I agreed.

She looked around and noticed Max wasn't there, as had I.

"Where's Max?"

"I'm not sure. He wasn't here when I woke up. Do you want me to go find him while you get up and ready?"

"Yes please."

I got up off of Selena, kissing her in the process and went on a search for Max. He wasn't in his room so I went downstairs to check. I found him sitting on the sofa watching fireman sam.

"Hey Max."

"Hello Demi."

"How long have you been down here for?"

"Only about an hour. I made myself cocopops!"

"Aww well done!"

The cutie seemed so proud of himself.

"You going to come upstairs and get dressed now? We've got a lot of work to do!" I asked.

"Okay then."

He turned the telly off and then grabbed my hand which I had extended to him. I ran him to his room and then went to check if Selena was done. She wasn't in her room but I could hear the water running down in the bathroom so I guessed she was brushing her teeth or washing her face.

I started to get dressed once shutting the door and soon I was ready. Just as I had pulled my top on Sel walked on.

"Oh, you nearly caught me in my bra. Good timing." I blushed.

"Yeah, great." She relied sarcastically.

"You perv!"

"Well look at you! You can hardly blame me."

She walked over to me and we started kissing once again. It was getting very heated, I picked her up and she wrapped her legs around me, I walked us towards the bed when Max decided to walk in again. That kid had the worst timing.

"What are you doing?"

"I was carrying Selena to her bed." I lied.

"Can't she walk?"

"Well yes she can, but I was also hugging her."

"Oh, okay."

He seemed to accept that answer so I just left it there.

_**Selena's POV**_

"Get your teeth brushed and have a wash babe. I'll get our breakfast ready."

"Okay."

I think Demi is getting suspicious. Well I know that she is. I just don't want her to find out because I feel better when I'm around her, still disgusting, sick and dirty but better then when I'm alone. If she finds out it will make everything worse than it already is.

She smiled at me and I melted inside. Her smile got me every time! I kissed Demi's cheek and then went downstairs with Max.

"What do you want for breakfast, Max?"

"I already had it!"

"You did, when?"

"Earlier, I made it myself."

"Really? I'm so proud buddy, me and Demi are having waffles though, do you want some of those?"

"No thank you. I'm full, can I watch telly now?"

"Sure you can bud."

He ran off to the sofa and I started mine and Demi's breakfast. They were only microwavable waffles so they were easy enough to make, yet still tasted so good.

They were ready within five minutes and me and Demi were sat at the table.

"So what have we got left to do then?" Demi questioned.

"We have to move all the furniture from Justin's old room to Max's and all the furniture form Max's old room to Justin's. Then we have to paint Max's new room blue, stick his glow-in-the-dark stickers on and his fireman Sam stickers! Put his new bedding on and then his room his done. Then we have to tidy up my old room and Max's old room and put the new white bedding on both the beds. We will then throw away all the old bedding and sweep the hall. Then the inside of the house is finished. We have to then pick up all the rubbish in the garden and mow it all. I'm getting Max some cool play stuff to go out there so we have to go and buy that, which I need you for as I can't drive. The locksmith is coming at twelve, so that's in an hour. He'll be here for about two hours doing both doors and then he'll leave. After we've done all that I just need to do all the washing that has piled up and do the washing up. That's basically it. If we can't get it all done today then we'll have to do some tomorrow."

"Wow that's a lot and I can't drive you! People will recognise me!"

"I know it is and no they won't. The shop is like an hour and a half from here on the complete opposite side of town. We aren't going to see anyone we know!"

"Okay then. What do you want to start on first?"

"Max's room?"

"Yeah sure."

I got Max to come and join us and then we headed upstairs. We went straight to Max's new room and moved all of the furniture out into the hall. We let him vacuum again but this time we supervised and helped. It took us about half an hour to do that, it was a good job we had a big hall though otherwise it never would have fit. We got the paint and then began, it would have taken us about an hour but I had to stop half way through to let the locksmith in and we took a break so it was more like an hour and a half.

"Sel, I think we should paint the two guest rooms as well? They're a bit patchy and I saw that you had white paint in the cupboards?" Demi suggested.

"Okay, I guess you're right."

We left the paint to dry and then went to get the white paint to work on my old room which would become a guest room. There wasn't much furniture in there so we just pushed it all into the middle of the room and started to paint the walls. This only took us half an hour because the walls were already white and just needed re-coating.

The blue painting in Max's room still wasn't completely dry so we decided we'd do the second guest room quickly. We did exactly what we'd done before and put all the furniture in the middle. Again it only took us half an hour and then the painting was done.

We began to put all the stickers and then stars onto the walls in Max's room and you could tell that he was so excited! Another half an hour had passed and his room was nearly finished, we just had to change the bedding. His room was painted, his carpet was clean, and his stickers were up.

The locksmith man shouted up to me so I went down to deal with that. I think Demi and Max were going to sort the bed out while I was down there though, so his room would be completely done.

"Okay miss, that will be £200."

"Okay."

I quickly ran up to my room and retrieved the money from where I had hidden it and gave the man the £200."

"Thank you, and here are your keys. Two sets."

He handed me the keys and I politely thanked him, once he was gone I headed upstairs.

"Oh my gosh! It's like two already!" I exclaimed.

"Wow, are you hungry Max?" Demi worried.

"No, I'm okay, for now." He reassured.

"Okay then, well Demi is it okay if we finish the two guest rooms and then head out to get the garden stuff? It's just the shops will probably be closed if we do the garden first?"

"Yeah sure babe, that's fine."

"Thanks."

I gave her a hug and a peck and then took hold of her hand to walk to the guest rooms. The rape had completely ruined me. The only thing that helped me cope now was being close with Demi.

It took us half an hour to sort the furniture out, fifteen minutes for each room and then we were ready to head out.

I didn't know how much money we'd need for Max's garden stuff but I knew it could be expensive. We'd only actually spent £250 so far and so we had plenty left. I grabbed about a grand and then ran down to join Demi and Max.

"Are you sure you don't mind driving, Dems?" I asked.

"I'm sure."

I grabbed Max's booster seat and then we left the house, locking it behind us. We were very careful to check if anyone was around but luckily they weren't so we set out on our journey with Max secured in the back.

"Max do you want me to buy you some food when we get there dude?" Demi offered.

"Yes please Demi."

"I can get that, don't worry." I said.

"No! I am treating our special man."

Oh my days! She said our! As long as I had Demi with me then I knew that I'd be okay. It was school I was dreading! Whenever I'm not with Demi, I crumble.

"Lena, how long is the drive going to take?" Max asked.

"About an hour and a half Maxy."

"That's long!"

"I know bud."

"What time will it be when we get there?"

"About four. That's very late are you sure you don't want to eat now?"

"I'm sure Lena."

"Okay then."

Me and Demi began to talk. Just about school.

"So tell me the gossip on all the kids!"

There was definitely one thing I wasn't telling her.

"Really, Demi?"

"Yes! Really!"

"Okay then, let me think. Lilly and Marshall had sex behind the bleachers Monday, Mark is suspected of being gay and Mr Ryan and Miss Thorton are suspected of having a relationship."

I didn't want to talk about sex or shit like that! It was just going to get me frustrated.

"No fucking way! Lilly seems so innocent!"

"Phaa," I couldn't help but laugh, "Okay, yeah innocent."

She was as innocent as Paris Hilton.

"Well what's she done?"

"Let's just say Marshall wasn't her first! She's fucked Barney, Steven, Cameron," It hurts just to mention the bastard! "Jack, Peter, Rhys, Kyle, and these are only the people I can think of."

"Oh my god! The slag!"

I just remembered that Max was in the car and we were both talking so filthily. I turned round to apologise to him and warn him never to repeat but he was asleep so I just left it.

"Yeah, what a slag!"

"I'm so glad you're not like that! My pure, innocent Selena!"

I turned my head trying to hide the tears that were now escaping. Why does she have to keep doing this. She's making me feel terrible! I know it's not her fault and she doesn't mean it but her constant chatter about how I'm innocent and a virgin, was really starting to tear me apart.

"Sel, what's wrong?"

I guess she saw the tears.

"Nothing but can we just change the subject?"

"I guess. What do you want to talk about?"

I just need her to talk to me! And take my mind off things.

"Just forget it." I huffed.

She looked hurt and it killed me knowing that I had caused it. Why did that idiot, Cameron, have to ruin everything?

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Yeah… kay."

Yep, she was hurt.

The rest of the car journey was completely silent. Neither of us said a word; we just concentrated on the road.

"Kay, we're here now Sel, are you going to get Max out?"

"Yeah, sure. Can you get us a trolley?"

"Yep."

It wasn't the same between us. She was acting strange and I knew why. She was upset that I was hiding something from her and I understand that.

I got out the car and went round to the back. I tried to get Max to wake up but he wouldn't budge. I picked him up out of his seat and locked the car. I guess if he wouldn't wake, I'd have to carry him.

"Why are you carrying him?" She asked.

"He won't wake up." I replied.

"Just put him in the trolley."

I reached over and placed him in one of the seats made for babies and toddlers, and strapped him in.

"Are you pushing the trolley?"

"No you can, Sel." And with that she walked off.

I grabbed the trolley and quickly walked after her.

"So what exactly are we buying?" Demi asked.

"A playhouse, see-saw, swing and a trampoline. I brought like a grand so we don't have to worry about price."

"Oh okay. I'll go get the playhouse and see-saw and you can get the swing and trampoline."

Then she walked off and left me. I get why she's mad but I need her! I feel like such crap. If it hadn't have been for Max then I probably would have just left it all and gone back home. I couldn't do that to him though so I pulled my emotions together and went on a search. It took me about half an hour to find both items and then I met up with Demi.

"The playhouse is £350 and the see-saw is £99."

"Oh okay, Dems. Where are they?"

"Follow me."

She took me to where they were situated and then she put them in the trolley.

"The swing is £99 and the trampoline is £150, so that's…"

"698." She finished.

"Oh okay thanks."

She just ignored me and started walking off towards the tills. It was half four and Max still hadn't woken up so I decided that I'd get him a sandwich encase he woke up and got hungry in the car.

The man from the shop helped us get everything that we bought into the boot and then we were off. I didn't even try to start a conversation in the car, Demi was still obviously mad and I was near to breaking.

As soon as we got back home, she helped me take everything we brought into the house and then she left. She didn't even bother to say bye, she just left.

I was starting to worry about Max as well; he had become increasingly hot and still hadn't woken up. I took him up to his bed and laid him down. I opened his window and then went back downstairs, he was probably just ill. I'd check on him in a bit.

I walked into the kitchen and pulled out my phone. I dialled Demi's number and then waited for the ring. It rung out for about ten seconds and then she cut off.

See what I've done! I've ruined everything! It's my entire fault; I fell for it all in the first place! I did that with Steven, I brought this upon myself! I am a slag! I'm useless! I'm a complete and utter waste of space! I collapsed on the floor and the only too familiar sensation washed over me. I was breaking down. Tears gushed out of my eye sockets like water falls, I was shaking uncontrollably and I didn't know what to do. I caught a glimpse of the knife sitting on the counter top. Should I do it? Do I deserve it? Yes!

I grabbed the knife and pulled it close to me, tracing the veins along my arm. Should I die? Is my life worth anything anymore? I was so tempted to just slice through my arm, cut open my veins and end it all but then Max's face flashed in front of me. I thought about how he'd be affected. I couldn't do that to him.

So I settled just for the pain. I rested my arm on my leg and brought the knife to rest on top. It was quick and painless. One minute I was fine and then the next I was in a frenzy, blood running down my arm, lots of it! There wasn't just one cut, no! There were several. I needed more! I needed a bigger release, so I cut deeper. The whole inside of my arm, up to the elbow, was covered in cuts. I carried on, I just couldn't stop. I kept cutting and cutting until all that was left of my arm was cuts and blood. Even then I didn't stop.

Finally I broke out of it and dropped the knife. I had lost. I was weak, just like I knew I was! Demi had left me and I'd lost it. I'd been sitting there with the blood dripping for about two hours now and I was exhausted. I slowly stood up and there was a pool of blood where my arm had once rested. My trousers were completely stained and it was still dripping down from my arm.

I shoved my arm underneath the spraying water from the tap, it didn't sting. I couldn't feel it at all. I then wrapped tea towels over my arm and secured them with rubber bands. I cleaned up the blood off the floor and then I put the knife in the sink.

I was completely numb! I didn't feel a thing; I just went straight to Max's room. He was still asleep and still as warm as he'd been before.

**A/N TRIED HARD WITH THIS. AND I AM HAPPY WITH IT NOW. PLEASE REVIEW. DO YOU LIKE IT? OR DO YOU THINK IT'S NOW RUINED?**


	12. The cuts were very deep

**SUNDAY**

I woke up and my arm was in agony. I didn't care though, I deserved the pain! I looked down and the tea towel had gone from white to red, it was on the bed too but you couldn't really see that as the sheet was red. I pulled off the rubber bands and removed the tea towels, it was bad. The cuts were very deep and so obvious, the blood had all dried and my whole arm was massacred.

I heard the sound of coughing and realised that it was Max, I grabbed a hoody to cover my arm and then got out of bed to go to him.

"Are you okay, Max?" I asked him.

"I feel really ill, Lena!"

I put my hand to his forehead like I had yesterday and he was still burning hot.

"Do you want me to get you some medicine?"

"Yes pl…" He didn't have time to finish his sentence as he was running to the toilet.

I ran after him and got there just as he was sick. It was nasty and the smell was horrible but I stayed with him rubbing circles on his back.

"You really aren't well, Max!"

"I know." He moaned.

"Are you done being sick, bud?"

"Yes."

I picked him up in my arms and held him close to my chest; I got him the mouth wash so he could clean his mouth and then took him downstairs. I placed him on the sofa, running back upstairs to get his blanket, and then I got him nice and cosy. I got his calpol from the cupboard and gave him the same amount he always had.

"Do you want anything else, Max?"

"A drink please?"

"What drink?" I asked.

"Water."

I went and got him a glass of water and then placed it beside him.

"Do you want something to eat, bud?"

"No, thankyou."

I put the Simpsons on knowing that he loved it.

"There you go, is it okay if I go upstairs for a bit?"

"Yes."

I left him on the sofa and went up to my room. As soon as the door was closed I grabbed my nail clippers off of the dresser and sat down on the floor. The whole time I was talking to Max all I wanted to do was to cut. I just wanted to cut my arms and make me suffer. So that's what I did. I repeated exactly what I'd done last night. I cut and cut and cut until my arm was even messier, until the blood was literally dripping. Only then did I stop. And I smiled. I was in pain, that's what I deserved.

After I was done with my arm I went to go take a shower. The water hit my arm like a knife, that's how bad the pain was, but that was good. I looked down at my body and the bruises were still clear and nasty. I remembered what the bruises represented. Maybe I have to wear the bruises away. For they show that I was a slag, that I wasn't a virgin anymore! If I throw up then they'll go?

I forced two of my fingers right down the back of my throat, I didn't stop when I gagged and I didn't stop when I couldn't breathe. I just carried on further and further. Soon enough the sick travelled up and projected out of my mouth. It felt good, just like cutting felt good.

When I was done in the shower I got out and wrapped myself in a towel, the bleeding had already stopped so I just shoved a hoody on with some leggings. It was already twelve o'clock. Either I was in the shower a long time or we just slept in.

Max was still watching the Simpson's when I came back down.

"You feeling any better buddy?"

"Not really."

"Oh, that's too bad. I'm going to do you some plain toast because that's supposed to be good for this sort of thing."

I put the bread in the toaster and grabbed a bucket, placing it beside him, encase he was sick.

"Here you go." I handed him the toast on a plate.

"Thank you Lena."

He took the plate and then he started to watch telly again.

I couldn't think of what to do. I didn't want to clean or wash or tidy! I didn't want to build! I didn't want to be around anyone! So I just went up to my room and grabbed my phone. I didn't have any new messages or anything. Demi hadn't even bothered to at least text me. I guess I didn't deserve it though, did I?

I decided that I'd write a song. That's what I'd usually do.

_**All around me are familiar faces  
Worn out places, worn out faces  
Bright and early for their daily races  
Going nowhere, going nowhere  
Their tears are filling up their glasses  
No expression, no expression  
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow  
No tomorrow, no tomorrow**_

_**Sit and listen, sit and listen  
Went to school and I was very nervous  
No one knew me, no one knew me  
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson  
Look right through me, look right through me**_

I was feeling so depressed right now. It's funny though how I was completely fine on Thursday! It took one stupid crappy action that completely changed everything! I want to die now, like I could quite happily kill myself right now but I can't because of Max.

Demi was the only thing keeping me together and now she's gone. If I tell her the truth it will be worse though, she spoke about how she loved that I was pure and innocent but I'm not! So if she finds out then she'll hate me!

I went back downstairs to check on Max and he was fast asleep, it was about seven o'clock. That's how long I spent working on that song and thinking about what a crappy person I am. I picked him up and carried him upstairs. I tucked him into his bed and then got his blanket. He obviously wasn't going to school tomorrow and neither was I.

I went back to my own bed and looked at my phone once more. Nothing! See, I didn't have any one! No one cared about me at all!

**Please review? The chapters are going to be a lot shorter lately because it's going to be very similar and it would get too boring otherwise.**


	13. We need to talk

**MONDAY**

I awoke and looked over at the clock. Eleven AM. Usually I would have been awake way before this but since I wasn't going to school, I slept in. I went to check up on Max and as soon as I saw that he was still asleep I ran back to my room. I grabbed the clippers and began my daily cutting, which I had done the two previous days. I still knew the reasons I was doing it. Because I deserved it! Because I was just some low life skank! No one wanted me around, Demi didn't want me, Miley didn't want me and even my own family didn't want me. Max did but he didn't understand.

I jumped in the shower after I was finished marking my arm and I let the pain take over my body. Just like I'd done the day before I examined my stomach, the bruises looked fainter then before? Maybe it worked? So I did it again. I made myself sick. I threw up all over the shower floor and just watched the gushing water guide the sick down the drain.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I was a disgrace. My face was white, there were thick black rings under my eyes and my arm was ruined! I would wake up every other hour all sweaty and gasping after I had another nightmare. This rape had completely taken over my body. It was safe to say I had lost this battle!

I shoved the hoodie back on and the leggings. I probably stunk but I didn't care or bother to check. It was now twelve so I thought that I'd better get Max up. As I walked through to his room, though I could see that he had already woken.

"Max, what are you doing?" I asked.

"Just getting dressed."

"Are you feeling any better?"

"Yes much better!"

"So do you want to go back to school tomorrow?"

"Yes, please."

At least I could be on my own tomorrow. I loved Max and all but I needed to be able to release the stress whenever I wanted and I couldn't with him around.

"Okay, then. Come downstairs and I'll get you some food."

He followed me down the stairs and then I settled him with some cocopops on the sofa.

"There you go buddy." I smiled.

"Thanks."

I don't know why I smiled because I wasn't happy. I guess I just didn't want him knowing anything was wrong.

I left him on the sofa to watch TV and then ran up to my room. I had one text but it was only off Taylor. I wanted it to be Demi!

**T: Where are you babe?xxxxxx**

**S: Max is ill and I think I have it too xxxxxx**

I didn't want to talk to anyone from school or anyone at all for that matter but I had to reply otherwise she might do something stupid like come round to my house.

**T: Oh okay hope you get better soon xxxx**

Yeah course she does. She's just saying that, she doesn't really care. Miley was just faking it and Taylor probably was too.

I decided to try and sleep, maybe that would take my mind off it? I closed my eyes and then soon I was having another nightmare.

"_**I don't want to be with you anymore!" Demi yelled.**_

_**I fell to the floor and I crumbled.**_

"_**Don't say that Dems! We were meant for each other!"**_

"_**Selena! I'm your teacher! There's 8 years between us. We were not made for each other!" She spat.**_

"_**I feel perfect when I'm with you. Please don't ruin that, I need you!"**_

"_**I don't care. I'm going! I'm your teacher and that's it now!"**_

"_**Don't go! Don't leave me Demi!"**_

_**But it was too late she was gone and then suddenly it was Stacey standing there.**_

"_**Even your own girlfriend gave up on you." She sneered. "No one likes you! No one wants you here! Go die!"**_

_**She walked out just like Demi had and then suddenly I was back in my kitchen. It was the first night I'd ever cut myself, it was Saturday! And I was picking up the knife. I was ready to end it all! Completely! I brought the knife too my wrists and I cut, I cut deep and I cut hard. The life was dripping from me and all I could hear was faint yelling.**_

"_**Lena! Lena!" Max boomed.**_

I woke with a start, jumping up, and shaking uncontrollably.

"Lena! You were yelling and thrashing about! Are you okay?" Max asked.

"I'm fine!"

"Lena?"

"Just shut up Max! I said I was fine!"

He had tears brimming in his eyes and I just looked away. The clock told me that it was eight. I had been sleeping for ages!

"Just go to bed!" I yelled.

He didn't move he just began to silently cry.

"Now!"

This time he did move, he ran straight out and I could hear his sobs echoing off of the walls.

I was a monster! Max was four! I shouldn't treat him like that! I needed to be punished, and I knew the punishment. I grabbed the knife and began my usual mission. I was cutting for five minutes and finally I was numb. I dropped the knife on the floor and lay down. My phone buzzed and I had two messages, the first one was Taylor.

**T: Are you coming in tomorrow?xxxx**

**S: No!xxxx**

The second one was Demi.

**D: You can't just not come to school because I'm mad! We need to talk.**

There were no kisses. The words kept looping in my mind; 'We need to talk.' What did that mean? She was going to break up with me, wasn't she? I couldn't go to school! I couldn't face Demi! Because if I did I knew that I'd be in even worse shape than I am now.

Picking up my phone, I lobbed it across the room; it hit the wall and smashed. There! Now no one could text me!

**Was it good? Did you hate it? Review please?**


	14. The water was more red than clear

**TUESDAY**

"_You had sex with that boy?" Demi demanded._

"_Yes, but it wasn't like that!"_

"_You disgusting whore!"_

_And she hit me. She hit me hard. I was falling fast. I knew she'd think I was a slag. It was true though, I was. _

"_I never want to see you ever again!" Demi yelled._

"_Please De…" She cut me off._

"_Never again!"_

_Then she was gone. Out of the room, out of my life._

I woke with a start for the third time in the past few days. The nightmares weren't helping with my mood at all! It was eight o'clock in the morning so Max was running late. I jumped out of bed and ran to his room.

He was still fast asleep when I got there so I sat on his bed and shook him awake.

"Max?" I whispered.

"What? Huh?"

He opened his eyes and gazed up at me.

"I'm so sorry Maxy! I didn't mean to yell at you last night, I really didn't!"

"It's okay Lena."

"Do you still want to go to school today, bud?"

"Yes please. I feel better and I need to get out."

"Okay then, you get dressed and I'll do you some pancakes. You must be starving!"

"I am."

I apologised, once again, and then ran downstairs to get his pancakes ready. He appeared about five minutes later and then started to eat. While he was finishing up, I did the little bit of washing up that needed doing, made his lunch and then packed his bag.

We left the house and locked the door. I'm pretty sure I looked like a right tramp but that was the last thing on my mind.

"Lena, aren't you going to school?" Max asked.

"No I'm not, I don't feel well. So I'll pick you up from school at half three from the playground."

We had just reached his school gates.

"Oh okay Lena. Hope you get better!"

"Thanks buddy."

I watched him as he ran up to the doors and then walked back home.

As I was walking I remembered work. That I'd missed it yesterday and that I would again today!

The urge to harm myself got very strong walking back and I ended up running. I began to feel very dizzy and sick, now that I thought about it, I hadn't exactly been eating.

As soon as I got in the house I grabbed the knife. I was becoming so predictable. That's all I did. Cut myself. That's all I deserve.

One minute I was cutting and then the next I felt faint and it all went black.

"_**Sel, what have you done to yourself?" Demi cried.**_

"_**I'm better now. I've got what I deserve!"**_

"_**No! You don't deserve that! You didn't deserve to be raped. You didn't deserve to get any of this. It's horrible that this has happened. It's more than horrible! It's not your fault!"**_

"_**But it is! Don't you see? I pushed you away, I wouldn't tell you. And I pushed Taylor away. I pushed everyone away."**_

"_**It doesn't matter. You still don't deserve it! Tell everyone what happened!"**_

"_**No I can't!"**_

"_**Well at least come back to school. Pull yourself together Sel! Be strong for everyone else if it's not for you!"**_

"_**No one wants me to be strong! They all want me to die!"**_

"_**That's not true."**_

"_**Yes it is!"**_

"_**Max doesn't! He needs you! He doesn't have a family as such anymore he just has you. And that's okay, as long as you're there. But at the moment you're not, are you?"**_

"_**No."**_

"_**Then sort it out."**_

"_**Demi?" I asked.**_

_**But there was no answer. The colour was slowly building up and I wasn't in the dark anymore.**_

I think I must have fainted. All the starving and the cutting and everything must really be getting to me. But what 'Demi' said was true! I need to try for Max.

I looked up at the mounted clock on the wall. It was two-forty five and I had been out cold for around five hours. I decided that I'd try to eat something before going to get Max. I made myself a cheese sandwich and then sat down at the table. But food was a big mistake. As soon as I took just a mouthful, there was an unpleasant sensation in my stomach which resulted in me being sick. Luckily it was in the sink.

I was feeling like shit again, so much for feeling better it lasted all of two minutes. I tried to keep myself busy so that I wouldn't be thinking about cutting or puking or how much I wanted to die. I ended up doing all the washing and cleaning the house. It only took me half an hour because the house wasn't even that messy.

By the time I was finished it was twenty past three and it was time to go and fetch Max. I got to his school for about half past and he was just leaving through the front doors.

As soon as he saw me, he ran up and hugged me. I didn't like the feeling it brought me. It was almost a tint of happiness but it was unusual.

I grabbed his hand and then we started walking.

"So how was school?" I asked him.

"It was okay, Lena."

"That's good."

The rest of the walk was in complete silence. As soon as we walked through the door, the silence was broken.

"Max, go get changed and I'll do your tea."

He did as he was told and I went to look through the cupboards. I just wanted something quick and easy that I could just give him and then go to bed. I decided to do beans on toast. I know that he loves it and it's very quick.

By the time he was back down, his tea was on the table.

"I've done you beans Max. Eat up."

I left him at the table and ran up to my room. I don't know why I went up there but I just did. I fell down on the bed and the tears starting falling. I wasn't keeping it together at all really but as long as I acted strong around everyone else, I was fine.

It had been about ten minutes so I went to check if Max was done.

"You finished now buddy?"

"Yes."

"Okay then."

I took his arm and then brought him up to his room. It was only six but I needed to get him settled.

"I'll put the Simpson's on."

That seemed to satisfy him.

As I was leaning over I caught a wiff of me and boy did I smell! If I was going to school tomorrow then I'd need to shower.

Stepping under the hot water once again made the pain take over. I was about to wash my hair when I spotted the razor on the floor. I couldn't resist is, I just couldn't. I picked it up and soon the water was more red than clear.

**REVIEW?:) **


	15. Your smile is so beautiful

**WEDNESDAY**

I'd set my alarm the night before to make sure that we weren't late. My arm was still killing, that was not going to change. I pulled up the hoodie and stared down at the mess I'd made. My whole arm was completely covered in cuts, some deeper than others. They weren't in any particular way or pattern, they were just scattered randomly around my arm. Though now there was hardly any skin left untouched.

It took all my strength to actually get up and out of bed, I didn't want to go to school at all. I didn't want to face Demi or Taylor or Stacey or Miley. And I knew that I'd definitely see them all because I had two sciences and maths.

"Oh you're already awake Max." I observed as I walked in his room.

"Yeah. But I'm really hungry."

"Okay, buddy. Come on."

He was already dressed as well, so I just took him downstairs to eat.

"Sit on the sofa and I'll get you your food."

I did him a bowl of cocopops and handed the bowl to his eagerly awaiting hands.

"When are the garden things being put up, Lena?"

"I'll do it on the weekend."

At least if I got that set up then it would be easier to get rid of him.

Now that Max was dealt with, I needed to cut. The urge was too strong to resist and I knew that I couldn't do it at school. I got back in the shower; I'd decided that was my favourite place to do it. I was in there for around half an hour just releasing all the built up stress on my arm.

As soon as I got out I bent over the toilet and put my fingers to use. If you are sick constantly it wears your stomach away, which in turn would wear the bruises away!

I didn't know what to wear for school. I wanted to look nice because if I looked like a tramp then I'd just get grief and that was the last thing I needed! I put plenty of deodorant and pray on and then went down to Max.

"Lena, you look really skinny! Have you eaten?"

"Yes, of course I have bud!"

I didn't want to lie to him. Those words made me so happy though! I was skinny! Which meant it was working! My stomach was wearing down.

"Okay, I got our bags ready for us; you just need to do the lunch."

I went over to the kitchen and made Max his lunch. I didn't bother doing myself any because I wouldn't need it.

We left the house at half eight and got to Max's school at twenty to nine.

"I'll see you tonight at about quarter to four."

"What about your work?" Max asked.

To be honest I had completely forgotten about that but I wasn't going anyway.

"I'm not going today, I have the night off."

"Oh, see you then!"

"Bye."

I gave him a quick hug and then set off to my school. By the time I got there it was ten to and I was just on time. I went straight in and sat by Taylor, not even glancing at Demi.

**DEMI'S POV – TUTOR**

I was just about to start the register when Selena came walking in. She looked terrible! Still beautiful, she always looked beautiful, but she had lost a lot of weight in just three days and her face was all pale. I shouldn't have been the way I was with her, she didn't do anything.

"Selena, what is up with you?" Taylor asked.

"Nothing, why?" She replied.

"You look so small and ill."

"That's all it is, I'm ill!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm fucking sure! I would now."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry for asking." Taylor spat.

**SELENA'S POV**

Great now I've pissed Taylor off as well. I was already fed up and I'd only been here for about ten minutes.

I hated being in the same room as Demi! She looked so amazing and it just reminded me of how I couldn't have her anymore. The whole of tutor went by excruciatingly slow, all I wanted to do was go home and get the knife.

"Okay class, you are dismissed." Demi announced.

I got up and was just about to leave when she spoke out again.

"Sel, can I see you?"

She called me Sel, why? She hates me.

I got a chair and sat on the other side of the desk instead of beside her.

"What?" I asked her.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, you called me over here."

"Sel, you've changed."

"Well done captain obvious."

I could see the pain radiating from her eyes but I didn't want to get hurt so I was trying to make it as quick as possible.

"You aren't going until you tell me!" Demi said.

That just made me cry. I don't know why? It just did. She thought I was a slag, why did she care.

"Why are you doing this? You don't care!"

"What the fuck? Yes I do, why would you even think that?"

"Because you left without saying goodbye. You stopped talking to me." I sobbed.

"I was just mad, something's happened and you won't tell me!"

"I don't want you to know, I don't want anyone to know. I can't deal with this!"

I got up to walk out and she grabbed my arm.

"Argh!" I yelled.

I pulled out of her grip quickly and coiled in pain.

"What is up with your arm, Selena?"

"Nothing! I'm fine!"

"Selena, don't lie to me!"

"Please Dems, just leave it!"

But she wouldn't drop it. She pulled me close to her and I ended up sitting on her lap. She grabbed the cuff of my sleeve and pulled it up. As soon as she saw it, she was off, tears streaming down her face.

"Sel, what have you done?"

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

She didn't say anything she just hugged me tight.

"What's happened with you?" She cried.

I still can't tell her! I'm too scared.

"I missed you Demi! I can't do this without you."

"You don't have to!"

"You hate me now though!"

"I never hated you. How could I? I've fallen in love with you! I love everything about you! The way your hair falls, that twinkle you get in your eye when you're happy, the way you kiss me, the way you hug me, the way you are with Max! Anything and everything you do is cute to me! I didn't mean for this to happen, I didn't want it to. I was just hurt that you wouldn't tell me!" Demi confessed.

"I love you too and that's what scares me. I don't want to go on without you. I'm scared. I promise I'll tell you what happened eventually but right now, I can't."

"I understand Sel. But you're not okay!"

"I know."

I broke down in her arms, this was the first time I had ever actually got like this in front of anyone. Usually I was on my own.

"What did you use to do this?" Demi asked.

"Different things. I didn't mean to get this bad but I can't stop. I feel okay when I'm with you but as soon as you go, my will runs away."

"Then I won't leave you! I'll stay with you."

"That's too much of a risk! I can't get you in trouble."

"It's fine! You can get Max from school and go straight home and I'll be there when you get back." She said.

"You don't have to do this!"

"No you're right, I don't. But I'm going to. I want to! I can't, I won't leave you."

Demi had no idea how much those words mean to me. I was so afraid of losing her I didn't realise that she was still here.

"What about at night? I want to stop but I know that I'll do it if you're around."

"It's simple, I'll stay! When you leave to take Max to school, I'll leave out the back and go to work. Then we'll meet here."

"That's just ruining your life!"

"No it's not. You make it sound like helping you is a chore. But it's not! I want to do this! I need to do this!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm certain."

For once in four days I felt hopeful. I felt like maybe I could get better. As long as I had Demi.

"Do you have a key for your house that I can have?" Demi asked.

I nodded and fished the key out of my bag.

"Here." I smiled, handing her the key.

"Your smile is so beautiful!" She gushed.

I brought my hands up to rest on either side of her face.

"And so is yours." Then I rested my lips on hers and shared a sweet kiss with the girl I love.

I had ten minutes left of drama so I decided to just stay with Demi, cuddled into her side, watching her mark some papers.

I know that I'm not okay yet. Maybe I won't be for a while! I'm still going to get the urge to cut, the urge to throw up, but right now I'm feeling good. And if Demi is around me 24/7 she'll be there to stop me, she'll be there to make me eat and most of all she'll be there to cheer me up.

"Babe, you going to come and sit with me at lunch?" Demi asked.

"Yeah, I missed my Dems!"

"Good."

"Oh and by the way, I didn't do myself any lunch so do you have anything I can eat?"

"Yeah, you can share mine?" She offered.

"That would be perfect."

I gave her a quick peck and then went to sit on my seat because the lesson was about to start.

Two minutes later everyone started to pile on and Taylor sat beside me.

**MATHS (2****ND**** LESSON)**

"I'm so sorry Tay. I was a bitch to you earlier and I didn't mean to be."

"It's okay Sel. You're obviously going through something terrible at the moment but I know that you'll tell me when I'm ready."

"I definitely will."

She smiled at me and then I turned my attention to the beautiful woman in front of me.

"Okay class, today we are covering rules of indices just like last lesson. You should all know how to do it so just take a look at the textbook in front of you, open it to page 100 and do the work."

Once all of the class had started working she came over to me.

"Sel, you weren't here Monday so do you need help?" She asked.

"As much as I'd love your help, I think I got it covered." I smiled.

"Okay babes." She whispered and then she returned to her desk.

"You two are cute!" Taylor admired.

"Yeah."

After that little conversation I started the work. Indices isn't exactly hard, I'd say it was one of the easiest parts of maths!

She had set us two pages and I didn't get much of it done. When I say much I mean, I got the date written down and that's it. It's because I realised that it was Wednesday, and that meant that me and Demi had been dating for an entire week! As soon as I'd realised that, she was all I could think about.

Her hair, her face, her eyes, her adorable chin! The way she walked, the way she slept, the way she ate. Everything about her. I was so lucky to have her. I was so absorbed in thinking of Demi that I hadn't even realised that everyone was leaving the room.

"Selena?" Taylor snapped me out of it.

"Umm, yeah?" I questioned.

"The lesson is over, did you get the homework written down?"

"No, what was it?"

She picked up two sheets off the desk and handed them to me.

"These two sheets have the questions on them that we were just doing from the book. We have to finish the ones that we didn't do in the lesson, so you have to do…" She glanced over at my book, "All of them?"

I could see Demi looking over at us and smirking, her look turned to concern when she saw that I'd done nothing.

"Yeah, I just got a little caught up, Tay."

"Sel, what was the reason?" Demi asked.

"I was thinking of you." I smiled.

She looked sceptical.

"I promise I was, I'll tell you about it at lunch."

"Okay, then I love you." She beamed.

"I love you too!"

I grabbed Taylor's hand and then we left the classroom.

"You guys have dropped the 'L bomb'?"

"Yep, we love each other so it only seemed right to say it."

"That's too sweet."

We went and sat outside of the chemistry lab because I didn't feel like going outside.

"So did you and Miss Lovato have a fight?" Taylor asked.

"No, why?"

"It's just she looked a little off yesterday and Monday."

Great. She was back to talking about that.

"Nope, she was just worried about me because I was ill."

"Oh okay, well you didn't reply to my texts!" She pouted.

Oh shit yeah!

"Sorry, I dropped my phone and it broke."

"Aww that's too bad!"

"Yeah."

"Okay girls, you can go in now." Mr Shaw said.

The rest of the class was outside the room now, I caught a glimpse of Miley and Stacey and immediately I was down.

"Selena, you coming?"

"Ugh, yeah."

I was trying to keep it all inside but just seeing them was ruining it all.

I went in to the classroom and took my seat beside Taylor. I was completely freezing up, all I wanted to do was grab the knife and slice up my arm. That's all.

"Okay class, today…"

That was all I heard of Mr Shaw's explaining. I completely closed down and laid my head on the desk and I couldn't stop the tears from falling. Just when I thought it was going to be okay, I just prove myself wrong.

"Selena, what are you doing?" He asked.

I looked up at him and he saw the state I was in.

"Okay sweet, you can go outside."

I smiled at Mr Shaw thanking him and went out into the corridor. I sort of wished he hadn't of sent me out, that gives me the freedom I needed.

I ran off to the toilets grabbing my clippers out my bag on the way. I crouched down in the cubicle and did what I'd become accustomed to. I felt like absolute rubbish to be honest, I'd let Demi down and my arm was worse.

I looked at my watch and saw that lunch was about to begin so I went off to her classroom.

I didn't bother knocking, I just walked right in.

"Hey babe."

"Hey Dems." I locked the door behind me and sat on Demi's lap.

"You've been crying." She stated.

"I know."

"And what's that on your arm?"

I looked down. Shit! Some blood had seeped through to my jacket.

"Umm, that's been there a while." I lied.

"No it hasn't! That wasn't there earlier."

She pulled my sleeve up like she'd done in the morning and just glared at me.

"You said you'd stop."

"I tried. I did!"

"Obviously not very hard."

"You don't understand how hard it is! I tried to not do it but I just couldn't!" I cried.

"Sel, you need to try and resist it!"

"I know I do, but it's so hard!"

"How did you manage to do it anyway? Weren't you in a lesson?"

"Mr Shaw saw that I was crying so he let me out."

"Okay, I have a plan. I'll email all the teachers and make sure that you're not allowed out of lessons; you have to stay with either me or Taylor at break and lunch. And I'll be with you every morning and night."

"This is too much to ask! I can't make you do this; it's going to ruin your life!"

"No it's not! I get to help you get better and spend time with you! I love it! Not that you're hurting obviously but that I can help you and spend time with you."

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yes. I'm certain! I love you."

"I love you too!"

I changed my position so that I was straddling her and brought my lips to her own. Soon enough she was slipping her tongue inside my mouth and I was in heaven. I pulled back and rested my forehead against hers.

"Did you know it's our one week anniversary today?"

"Of course I do, we can celebrate it tonight." She winked.

"What did you have in mind, beautiful?"

"Whatever you want baby."

Oh my god! She was making me so hot.

"Max is around you know?" I joked.

"He can go to bed."

"Okay, I need to finish this conversation right now! Until I get too excited, if you know what I mean?"

"Aww Sel, your hormones kicking off are they?"

"Just a bit, you're so old now I guess you miss the raging hormones as a teenager!"

"Oi cheeky, I'm only twenty-four!"

"Yes, just eight years older than me." I teased.

"You are asking for it now!"

"Oh yeah? What you going to do?"

"This!" She growled.

And then she practically attacked my lips, biting, nibbling, and sucking. I'd never been in so much ecstasy ever!

**Please review:)**


	16. I'm proud of you

**A/N I have written this on my phone because my laptop is broke!:/ so if there are any mistakes I do apologise.**

The bell sounded alerting me and Demi that our heated and pleasurable make out session had to end.

"I don't want to leave you babe!" I moaned.

"I know sweetie but we'll have the whole night together!" Demi smiled.

She really did know how to make me smile. I raised myself off of her lap and made my way to the door.

"See you at my house sexy!" I winked.

"Can't wait!"

I sadly left the confines of the classroom and headed to English as that was my next lesson. As I arrived I noticed Taylor was already seated and I went to join her. I wasn't looking forward to the conversation that would follow.

**4th** **lesson** - **English**

"Look I was going to leave you alone Sel. But it's too obvious that something is going on and I feel like a crap friend not knowing." Taylor explained.

"You're not a crap friend! You're anything but! It's just this is really hard."

"You can tell me anything!"

This is probably true but I still wasn't letting her know about the rape. I'd just explain the whole arm situation, after all I did need her help as well.

"I know I can! Just promise that you won't tell a soul!"

"I promise!"

Here goes...

"Well basically me and Demi had an argument on Saturday and when she left I was feeling very bad! So bad that I felt I needed to take out my frustrations. Anyway long story short I'm addicted to self-harming and I can't stop."

"Oh my god! I can't believe you've been going through all that and I haven't been around! I'm so sorry!"

"This isn't your fault at all! It's going to be okay anyway! You and Demi are going to be around to make sure I don't do stupid things and eventually. It will all be well and good!"

"It's not going to happen just like that Sel!"

"I know! I've already caved once but I want to overcome this so bad! So as long as I have help I know that I can do it!"

"It's going to be so hard!"

"Oh my lord! Just let me be positive for a while! I know it's going to be hard but I have to just stick with it."

"I'm proud of you."

I didn't understand why she was proud? I was weak and stupid and now I have to fix it, simple as.

"Okay..."

We shut up after that because Mr Friles and been sending continuous glares in our direction.

"Taylor! What was the assignment just set?" Mr Friles asked.

"Umm I don't know sir."

"You don't know?" He mocked.

"No I don't sir."

"Well that's too bad! What about you Selena?"

"Not a clue." I sighed.

"I figured as much! You two better listen from now on!" He boomed.

I figured that it would be pretty smart to shut up and listen right about now.

"The assignment is to read the rest of 'Romeo and Juliet' you started to read it with the cover teacher on Friday and Monday. Selena, you weren't here Monday were you?"

"No sir."

"Well it looks like you have more than everyone else to do. It has to be read by Mondays lesson next week."

"Okay then thanks." I replied.

Then I started to write it all down in my book so that I didn't forget. English wasn't exactly one of my favourite subjects so the urge to not do it would be large. After he had set us our work for the lesson, which was to start the homework, me and Taylor resumed our conversation.

"So who's going to keep you in line at home?" She asked.

"Demi is. We both agreed that it would be best if she stayed at mine for a bit. Just to make sure I don't do anything stupid."

"Isn't that a little too risky? What if you guys get caught?"

"We won't! We're going to be so careful! We know what could happen if we're not."

"Okay then. But I sort of wish I could help too. I feel sort of left out." She pouted.

"Do you want to sleep at my house on Friday with Demi and Max?"

"Yes! Thank you, I love you."

"It's not a problem, Tay."

For the rest of the lesson I actually did what we were supposed to. I only got to like page 16 but at least that was a start.

**5th** **lesson** - **physics**

The bell went and then me and Tay headed to Physics. I felt a sense of doom over take me when I realised that I was going to have to face Miley and Stacey again. It was so unfair! They were the ones in the wrong and yet I have to suffer. I need Demi now but I know I can't have her. I have to face this.

"Okay class. Well today we are researching infrared radiation. Does anybody know what radiation is?" Mrs Pierce asked.

No one put there hand up.

"I know that at least half the class knows a bit. So if no one others I shall have to pick on someone." She threatened.

Still no one raised their hand.

Okay... Selena?"

She had to pick on me didn't she! I could hear the bitches giggling and laughing at me from behind. It was times like these when the knife, or anything sharp, was my only friend. The only thing I was interested in.

"Umm... Well I think that infrared radiation is what objects emit? Every object emits infrared but they all emit different amounts. The amount it emits all depends on the heat of the object." I was fairly sure that was right.

"Well done that was right." She praised.

Miley and Stacey were laughing even harder now, I could her random muttering words such as 'boffer' and 'slag.' The taunting was just pushing me over the edge. I was near to snapping and I think miss noticed.

"Okay Miley and Stacey out now! I won't have you behaving like that. You both have a detention after this lesson for an hour. You can tell me then why you find Selena getting a question right so amusing. Is being smart something to laugh about? Or are you just jealous? I didn't see you in any rush to answer." Mrs Pearce smirked.

I couldn't help but laugh along with the rest of the class as I watched the two red-faced girls leave.

"Anyway... As you are aware greenhouses are used to store plants as they keep them warm. Why is this?"

No one put their hand up once again. I knew the answer and now that Miley and Stacey were gone I was feeling much braver. So I raised my hand.

"Ahh, Selena?"

"Is it because the sun emits short wavelength infrared radiation which can travel through glass. When the infrared gets through the glass it passes on to all the object inside. The objects emit longer wavelengths than the sun, which can't pass through glass, and so it's trapped and keeps everything inside the glass warm?"

"That is completely right, I think I'll give you three points for your efforts today."

Yay! Three more points!

"So now that we all know a little bit more, open up the textbooks on your desks to page 100 and answer the questions."

We all got on with the work and Mrs Pearce went outside to presumably talk to Miley and Stacey. Raised voices could be heard and then suddenly they were walking back in with scowls plastered on each of their faces. I couldn't resist smiling at their unhappiness.

The lesson went by very slowly to be honest. I managed to finish all the work on the sheet and I gained myself and extra point. But all I wanted to do was get Max and then go home to Demi.

Soon the bell was ringing and I was up faster than you could say 'Lovato.' I didn't want to walk to Max's school faster than usual because then I'd just end up getting home before Demi and I'd have to wait for her either way.

**After** **school**

It took me the usual five minutes to get to his school and I couldn't wait to see my Maxy. As soon as I got there I was running up to him and pulling him into a bear hug. I guess with the way I've been lately, I haven't really treated Max right. I almost treated him exactly the way mom and dad did. And that sickens me.

"I love you so so so much Bud! I'm so sorry for the way I've been acting lately but I'm back now. I promise!"

"I missed you to Lena!"

Awe my amazing Max. I places him back down on the ground and took a hold of his hand.

"Let's go sign you out little man and then we'll get you home."

He was signed out in a matter of two minutes and we were in our way home.

"When we get back, someone will be there." I smiled.

"Who?"

"Demi."

His face lit up as soon as I said her name. I couldn't help but love his reaction.

"I missed Dems almost as much as you!"

I mocked offence.

"I said almost!" He defended.

"I know you did Max."

We reached the door and I told Max to get changed first and then he could say his hellos.

"Demi!" I called as soon as I'd got the door closed.

"I'm in the kitchen!"

I followed her voice and soon found the goddess. I wrapped my arms around we from behind and gently kissed her exposed neck.

"What are you doing beautiful?"

"I'm making you, me and Max dinner. I got the impression that you hadn't eaten in a while and that needs o change!" She ordered.

I loved this protective side. The side that will make sure I'm okay and look after me.

Our loving embrace was broken when I felt Max jump on top of me. I spin round and caught him in my arms.

"Little monster!" I screamed tickling him and soaring him round the room.

His adorable chuckle echoed off the walls.

"I sure have missed you Max." Demi admitted.

"I missed you too Dems!"

I gently placed Max into her awaiting arms so that she could have the hug she wanted.

I watched as Max snuggled into her side and gave her a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

"Guess what max?"

"What?" he asked.

"I'm going to be staying with you and Lena for a while!"

"You are?"

"Definitely!"

"Yay!"

Max was so happy and it warmed me inside.

"Okay well I'm doing us all some pizza now, so I'll have to put you down."

"Okay then." He pouted.

Demi placed him on the floor and I told him to go watch tv until its ready.

"So I invited Tay to sleepover on Friday, is that okay?"

"Sure thing babe! Taylor is a sweet girl and your best friend. I need to get to know her and spend more time with her if I want this to work."

"And do you want it to work?" I guess I was just worrying.

"More than anything! Now let me finish the pizza!" She said.

I smiled at her antics and went to sit with Max. It was about five minutes later when Demi called us to say it was ready.

We ate the pizza and then sat down to watch a movie.

**Reviews?:)**


	17. I want to get away from it all

A/N REVIEW MAYBE?:) AND SORRY IF THERE'S MISTAKES, LAPTOPS STILL BROKE SO IT WAS WRITTEN ON MY PHONE.

**Selena's POV Thursday **

I woke up to the sound of the alarm, constantly beeping on a loop. I turned it

off and rolled over. I was met with the most beautiful girl in the entire world. My Demi. She was still fast asleep and the alarm hadn't fazed her sleep at all! I decided that I'd let her stay in bed while I got Max up. He hadn't had a wash in a while, due to me being all depressed, so he was in dire need of one. As I approached Max I realised that he was awake and playing with his toys. As soon as he saw me he ran up and engulfed me in a hug.

"What was that for Maxy?" I chuckled.

"It was a thank you!"

"For what?" I asked.

"For Demi being here. We've never been a family but yesterday it seemed like we were. It's always just been me and you, that was okay but I always wanted a normal family like everyone at school. Now you and Demi are my mom's. It's just the three of us and it's perfect!" He gushed.

That seriously warmed my heart! He was just four years old and yet what he said made perfect sense.

"Me and Demi are always going to be there for you and when she's awake you can give her a big hug!"

"I will Lena." He beamed.

"Okay well head to the bathroom in the mean time and i'll get you your towel and clothes."

We both met in the bathroom and I got the shower ready for him. I left the towel and clothes on the top of the toilet and went to wake Demi.

I stopped by the door and just watched the angel sleep. She was so peaceful and pretty, seriously how did I get that lucky? I decided that I'd wake her with a kiss, the last time she tried to do that for me it didn't go to well, but this time would be different. I crept over to the bed and gently holstered myself up so that I was straddling her, she still hadn't woken so I took it as my cue to kiss her. I placed our lips together in a sweet kiss, I felt Demi respond and she obviously had other ideas. She spun round so that she was on top and turned the kiss with much more heated force. She slipped her tongue into my awaiting mouth and a battle of dominance began which she obviously won. It was one of our best kisses and it felt so damn right!

"Mmm... Morning sexy." Demi murmured.

"Morning Dems, feeling a little feisty today are we?" I teased.

"Don't you know it! What's the time anyway?"

"It is..." I paused to check the clock, "Half seven."

"Half seven? Why am I up this early?" Demi moaned.

"Because Max has just informed me that he absolutely loved last night because it made him feel like we were a proper family so I was hoping we could all have breakfast together. And we all need to get ready." I explained.

"Well because I love you and Max I guess it's okay." She smiled.

"We love you too!"

"Oh and babe I need to borrow some of your clothes today cause I don't have any."

"That's fine, I'll get you some in a bit Dems."

"I should probably go home from school and get some of my stuff because I plan on staying here for some time. Do you think you will be okay in your own for about half an hour?" She asked.

I wanted to say yes. I wanted to believe that the answer was yes, but it wasn't. The urge to cut and make myself throw up was still high, I was surprised I managed to keep the pizza down. I knew that if I was left on my own at the moment I would definitely cave.

"No, I don't think I can be trusted yet." I admitted.

"Well you could invite Taylor round after school then? I know she's sleeping Saturday but it would only be for like an hour?" She suggested.

"Yeah, that will be fine."

"Okay then, what lessons have you got today?"

"I have PE, music, English, re and geography."

There was no way in hell I was even attempting to go to RE! I was doing so well and if I saw that pricks smug face or had to listen to his stupid remarks, I knew that I'd relapse.

"Well I'll talk to your teacher about PE, I guess you just have to watch. All your other lessons are good though, right?"

"Not RE!" I said adamantly.

"But you didn't want to go there because of Steven before and that's all cleared up."

I could feel the tears beginning to build, I knew that he would just wreck me.

"It's complicated but please don't make me go!" I cried.

"Sel, just tell me what's going on!" She pleaded.

"I will I promise! Just not yet, I'm not ready yet!"

She could tell that I was beginning to break so she pulled me into a hug and stroked my hair.

"Okay I'm sorry, I won't pressure you into telling me."

"Thanks." I whispered.

We'd just finished talking when Max ran in all dressed.

"Look at me Demi! Look Lena! I got myself out the shower and dressed!" Max exclaimed.

"Well done! Did you remember to turn the shower off?" Demi asked.

His cute face turned to one of wonder.

"Uh oh."

We both chuckled as he ran to turn the water off.

"You okay now beautiful?" Demi asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good."

The crying had stopped, I sat up and wiped the stray tears. I brought my forehead to rest against hers.

"I love you so much Demi!"

"I love you too Sel."

I reluctantly got up off of Demi and got my towels from on top of the cupboard.

"Can you come and check the bathroom please?"

I was trying to refrain from asking her directly and she could see that.

"Course babe."

Demi followed me to the shower and once we got there we met Max, who still hadn't managed to shut the water off.

"Don't worry about it Maxy. Go down and watch tv, me and Dems will be down in a bit, okay bud?"

"Okay Lena."

Anything sharp was on the side by the sink. Demi took the razor, clippers and anything else that I could use.

"There you go sweet, I'll get in after you."

And with that she left. I slowly peeled my clothes off, examining the bruises all over my stomach. They were a shade of green now, it would still be a while till they were gone completely. My area was still swollen and sore even though it had been a week. I stepped under the hot spray of water and for once the pain wasn't that bad. My arm was still horrible and still stung. The realisation finally hit me, I had actually been doing this to myself, my whole arm from the elbow down was completely covered in deep, ragged cuts. The last time I had actually cut myself was the day before, that may not seem long to you but for me it was.

I just didn't know how long I could keep it up for. I wanted to stop, I wanted to be strong but my brain wanted something different. My brain was telling me to pick up the knife. I curled down on the floor, everything became to much. That's why I should never be happy, because it doesn't last very long! I just want the release that I've become addicted to, but I can't! She won't let me have it. I brought the injured arm up to rest on my knee. I began to scratch away at it, picking all of the scars, causing the blood to flow again. It hurt a lot, maybe even more than it did when I first cut them. I scraped and scratched and even bit my arm, causing all sorts of bruises to form. I knew that I was letting Demi down but right now that's all I wanted to do.

After washing I decided that it was definitely time to get out. I turned the water off and wrapped the towel round my body. I remembered that I hadn't brought any clothes in with me so I had to hide my arm. As soon as I walked into my room Demi's eyes went hungry.

"Wow. You should wear a towel more often!" She flirted.

"Oh yeah? Well I hate to break it to you but it's five to eight, so you need to have a shower! No time for playing." I teased.

"Please?" She whined.

"I'm afraid not."

She walked across to meet me by the door and gently kissed my lips. I darted away from her near grip and just laughed at her reaction. Just as she was about to leave I called her back.

"Dems?"

"Yeah?" She spun round hopefully.

"You forgot your towels." Her expression was absolutely hilarious!

I waited until she left the room then shut the door. I was finally able to remove the towel from my arm and it stung like a bitch! It was all read and sore, I liked the pain though. I always had done.

I dressed in a long sleeved blue top and then threw on a hoodie just in case. I wore white wripped jean shorts as well and my famous black converse to top it off. Then I left some clothes on my bed for Demi, ones that I had never worn before, so that no one suspected a thing.

I left the room and headed downstairs to make breakfast.

"Max, do you want waffles or pancakes?" I asked.

"Pancakes please."

I got three plates out and piled a matching three pancakes on each plate. They were just the microwaveable ones so they were easy enough to cook but still tasted nice. It was just two minutes per plate and soon they were all heated and ready for the toppings.

Just as I was about to ask max what he wanted I was distracted by a beautiful girl wrapping her arms round me from behind. She began to kiss my neck, mirroring exactly what I had done the day prior.

"Mmm... Demi." I moaned.

"Do you like this?" She asked.

"Yeah." I smiled.

"Too bad."

She unwrapped her arms and retreated to the table.

"Paybacks a bitch! Oh and I'll have whipped cream and honey." She smirked.

That tease! Oh my life! I didn't even know if I could focus on the damn pancakes now, I was way too hot and bothered.

"That was just mean Demi!" I moaned.

"So's what you did upstairs, now get me my pancakes we only have fifteen minutes before we have to leave."

I grabbed the honey out of the cupboard and the whipped cream. I quickly finished Demi's pancakes and set them before her on the table.

"There you go m'lady."

"Why thank you, Selena." She smirked.

I left her to eat and then went back to the other pancakes.

"What do you want on your pancakes?" I asked Max.

"Whipped cream please."

I just as quickly finished Max's and then put it on the table.

"There you go Maxy."

Max joined Demi at the table and then I grabbed my plate. I much prefer my pancakes plain.

"So Dems, when's your free lesson today?" I wondered aloud.

"It's fourth, when you have RE."

"Oh okay cool, what you doing about PE?"

"I'll just keep you in tutor until I've sent an email to Miss Ryley."

"Why is she talking like she's your teacher Lena?" Max butted in.

Shit! What do I even say to that?

"Umm because..."

"She's your teacher isn't she Lena?"

"Yeah." I said. To be honest I was scared of what max would say.

"That's okay. I like Demi so I'll let her off." Max smiled.

"Awe that's so sweet little man! I like you to."

"But Max you can't tell anyone that Demi is here! And you can't let any of school or anyone know that Mom and Dad have gone, okay?" I warned.

"That's fine. I love it like this. Just you me and Demi. We're a family." Max beamed.

"Yeah we are." I smiled glancing at Demi to meet her gaze.

We all carried on eating out food and soon we'd finished.

"Okay then babe, I'm going to school. See you in tutor."

Demi got up from the table and came round to meet me. We shared a sweet kiss before she went to grab her stuff and she left.

"Okay then Max, we're already running late cause it's half past. You get our stuff ready and I'll do lunch. I don't need my pe kit or my re book though bud." I told him.

"Okay then Lena."

Max ran off to get our bags done and I headed to the fridge. I did us both a cheese sandwich, got us a chocolate bar and yoghurt and then a drink to go with it. By the time I had completed lunch Max was beside me. I put the food in the bags and then me and Max set off for school.

It took us all of five minutes to get to the primary school.

"I'll see you tonight bud." I smiled.

"See ya, Lena."

It was about quarter to now and so I had to practically run to school. I got there just in time and quickly took my seat, not before smiling at Demi.

**Tutor**

"Hey, how was your night?" Taylor asked as soon as I was seated.

"It was amazing. So I was wondering if you wanted to come over to mine tonight? 'Structure' has to go and get her stuff from her house and I don't really want to be alone after everything." I asked.

I knew it wouldn't be a good idea to be alone. I had managed to still damage my arm even when I was under supervision so I don't know what I'd do without someone there.

"Yeah course I will. I'm going to be here to help you as well." She said.

"Thanks. You still up for Friday? We can have a girly night plus Max. You should really get to know my girlfriend, she's pretty amazing." I boasted.

"I bet she is and yeah of course I'm up for it."

My eyes then focused on the front of the classroom where my beautiful girl was writing on the board. Seems we have some test coming up in like four weeks. We'll have an assembly three weeks tomorrow telling us all what to expect and what tests there will be.

"Okay then class read the board and make a note in your planner of the date." Demi announced to the class.

Everyone burst into chatter then, reaching in their bags so they could do what they were told. I didn't bother, I'd still be with her in two weeks so she could just remind me.

"Okay then, you can all talk beside yourself while I sort out a problem. Selena, can you come here please?" Demi asked.

The whole class burst out in a chorus of 'ohhs' and 'uh ohhs' I swear they love it when there's drama. I went to her desk and grabbed a chair to sit beside her.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"Look as soon as I got in today I was spoken to by mr lake."

"About?"

"Miley, Steven, Cameron and Stacey have been to see him about bullying. Apparently you've been harassing them, calling them names and you've been trying to make sexual advances towards Cameron and Steven."

The second she said that I began to cry. I tried to hold it in but I just couldn't, it was hard to believe that after everything they'd done to me, they still couldn't quit it.

"Do you want to have this conversation somewhere else Sel?"

"Yea please." I managed to get out in between my sobs.

"Okay class I have to leave for a minute, Taylor can you watch the class please?"

"Yea." Taylor said.

Demi placed her hand on the top of my back and began to rub in soothing motions. She led me to the staff room as it was empty and we took a seat on the sofas.

"Sel, do you know why they'd do this?"

"Because they hate me! Because they're set on ruining my life. I haven't done a single fucking thing to them, they're the ones bullying me!" I sobbed.

"I know baby. I'll get to the bottom of this." She soothed.

"What's going to happen now?" I asked.

"Well they've got everyone on their side so Mr Lake has set you detention everyday for two weeks."

"What the fuck? I haven't done anything to them! He hasn't even bothered to get my point of view!"

"I know sweet, I tried to stick up for you but he wasn't having any of it."

"But what about pe? I have to see the smug twats and they're going to drive me crazy!"

"Just try to stay strong, don't rise to it and I'll see you at break. The bells about to go so come to tutor with me and then you can go to pe? I've already sent the email."

"Okay."

She pulled me in for a hug and it actually did help.

"Thanks so much Dems." I sniffled.

"It's okay babe."

We walked off to tutor and I met Taylor.

"What was that all about?" She asked.

"I don't want to talk about it!"

"Okay. Let's go to PE then, yeah?" She suggested.

"Yeah."

We left tutor and then got to Pe to see Miley and Stacey waiting by the door.

"If it isn't the bully." They teased.

"Fuck off! I'm not in the mood." I warned.

"Aww little touchy after your detention?"

"Just move Stacey." I seethed.

Miley had moved to the side and wasn't saying anything now.

"He didn't really do anything after the bullying but as soon as sexual harassment was mentioned he was not happy!" Stacey said.

"I'm warning you!"

"Don't like being a slag do you?"

I was not standing for this! She knew what it was doing, she knew how badly the rape had affected me and now she kept on using that against me. I'd tried to rise above it, I did but I couldn't, not now! I jumped at Stacey pushing her to the floor. I jumped on top of her and just kept punching and clawing at her, my frustration was so high, id been building up all this hatred and now it was going to come out.

"Selena stop!" Taylor yelled.

I didn't listen, I was not interested at all. I just had to make her pay. Soon though I was being pulled away, I still fought but the person pulling me was persistent.

"Stop! Now!"

It was Demi. She was the one pulling me and she'd seen me lose it. Now that I couldn't get mad and run on my rage, the fear and hurt took over. I completely broke down, in front of everyone, I flipped. I was kicking, pushing, thrashing, crying, screaming. I think I was scaring Demi but I had just lost it completely. Everyone was gathering round Stacey on the floor, she was lying down and there was loads of blood. I think it was just her nose, to bad! I wished id done more damage.

I was taken to the staff room once again. Demi was asked to stay with me as she was the only one who seemed to be able to calm me, little did they know that the only reason she could help me was because I was dating her.

"What the hell was that?" Demi ordered.

I was still shaking, I could hardly comprehend what she was saying.

"Selena?"

"What?" I yelled.

"Why did you just do that? Do you know how much trouble you are in now?"

"I don't give a fuck! I just don't care! I want to go home, I want to get away from it all."

"Well that's probably going to happen! Because you are going to be suspended."

"Good!"

Just as I yelled that Mr Lake came storming in.

"Miss Lovato, you can leave now."

Demi got up and left, she didn't even glance at me once, I knew she was mad!

"What do you think you're playing at Selena?" he asked.

I didn't bother to even listen.

"Selena?"

"What?" I snapped.

"Don't talk to me with that tone, why did you do that?"

"Because Stacey wound me up. I am sick of dealing with her crap and I wasn't going to do it anymore."

"Well you're suspended. As of today you are not allowed back in the school tomorrow or for the whole of next week!" He ordered.

"Okay."

"I'll be giving your mother a ring."

Shit! Mom still had her phone with her but what if she let it slip. What if he found out that we had no parents looking after us?

"I want you to leave the school immediately. And you are not to return until next Monday." He said calmly.

I got up and walked out. I ignored everything as I made my way out of the building. The five minute walk seemed like forever. The anger and hurt was completely bubbling inside of me, I knew exactly what I was going to do when I got home. Become more acquainted with my old friend the knife.


	18. I need to fix this

As soon as I set foot in the house I ran straight to the kitchen. I was searching for the knives. I needed something, my release but I couldn't find anything! There were no knives what so ever, that's just shit crazy. I decided that I'd go upstairs into the bathroom and just use the razor but that wasn't in there either. I couldn't find a single sharp object in the entire house, what the fuck? I guess Demi took them all but when did she even have time to do that? Like seriously.

I was starting to get hysterical, without cutting I had no way to calm down. I needed something. I tried to think back to when my mom was with us, what were her hiding places for the booze. I wasn't sure if I'd gotten them all, under the bed... Yes. Under the floor boards... Yes. At the back of the cupboards... Yes. I guess I'd gotten all the alcohol, though I swear my mom had way more than what I recovered. Did she take it with her? I doubt it. My brain was going to overload, I suddenly found the urge to heave and realised I was about to be sick. I ran for the toilets and wretched my guys out. Then it was decided that I'd take a shower and scratch away at my arm, there were no towels in the room because I'd put them in the wash just this morning. I ran to the airing cupboard to collect one. It was situated right at the bottom of the landing securely in the wall. I reached into grab one when my hand hit something hard. Well that's odd. I grabbed whatever I'd found and pulled it out. Vodka! There was a whole bottle with my name on it!

I ran down to the lounge and collapsed on the sofa, my shower long forgotten. I didn't bother about a glass I just opened the bottle and began to down it. As I neared closer and closer to the bottle of the bottle the room got more and more distorted. Soon I couldn't comprehend anything and the room was completely distorted.

**Demi's POV**

I had a feeling that after the fight, Selena would be in no mood to collect Max from school so I went there straight after work to collect him. They had no problem releasing him into my custody as he obviously knew who I was. I was very shocked and worried after all that had gone on still. Me and Sel had our second fight, I guess it wasn't major but I was still pretty pissed. But even though I was pissed that didn't mean that I didn't care or that I wouldn't still be there for her.

As I stepped foot in the house with Max in tow I realised that things weren't any better at all. She was there passed out with an empty vodka bottle beside her on the floor.

"Why is Lena asleep on the sofa?" Max asked.

"She was just tired after school buddy. Just go up, get changed and then play upstairs please. I'll call you when dinners ready, okay little man?"

"Yes Dems."

Max ran off up to his room and I approached the unconscious Selena on the sofa.

"Selena? Selena? Wake up!" I kept shaking her but she wasn't stirring. I wasn't really sure what to do.

"Selena!" I yelled.

Looks like that yell was loud enough as she jumped up an clutched her head.

"Demi... What the fuck are you here for?" she mumbled.

"In case you didn't realise I'm staying here."

"You were pissed before." she stated.

"And I still am."

I watched her as she settled back down on the sofa. I didn't think she'd be able to have gotten anything to cut her arm as I took anything sharp away but just to be sure, I should check.

"Show me your arm." I ordered.

"What no!"

She looked scared and shocked which gave me an uneasy feeling.

"Selena now."

"I can't. Please don't make me!"

Yes. She'd done something to her arm.

"You can show me or I can make you?"

Slowly she etched her sleeve further and further up. As soon as the scars were visible I could tell that she'd messed with it. Her scars were worse, there were bite marks along the underside and scratch marks. I felt the tears prick in the corner of my eyes.

"When?" I asked.

"This morning. I'm sorry." She cried.

"Sel, you can't stop can you?"

"No. I've tried but it's passed that now." She muttered.

"We've got to get you some help. This isn't right! I need to fix this."

"You can't." She whispered.

"Yes I can."

"How?"

I ignored her question and simply left the room. I went right up to where she kept her laptop and started to surf the web. Selena wasn't going to get better on her own, she needed professional help. Because of everything that happened with her mother and father and the fact that I am staying here, I need a rehab that asks no questions. A simple in and out process. I check her in, she gets help and then she leaves. No questions asked. I soon found the exact place I was looking for._ 'Three Tree Rehab Centre_' I got the phone number and then grabbed my cell.

**Receptionist: Hello this is 'three tree rehab centre, how may I help you?**

**Demi: Hello I have a sister, her name's Selena Gomez. She's sixteen and she really needs your help. Umm she's got a problem with self harm and other things I think. **

**Receptionist: Okay, well you will have to bring her in so we can assess her. Usually we'll know a lot about people's cases once we've met them.**

**Demi: Am I able to bring her in now?**

**Receptionist: Yes that's fine, we're open. Do you have the address?**

She gave methe address and then I hung up. I didn't know if this was a smart thing to do, would they believe I was her sister? Or would she research me? Would they have to contact school? Would school realise that I'm living with Demi and then realise we're together? There are a lot if risks but Selena's health is more important.

"Pass me your phone Selena." I said as I walked back into the lounge.

"Why?" She asked.

"Because I need it. Don't make me ask twice."

She hesitated but then handed it to me. I walked off with her phone so that I could ring Taylor.

**T: Hello?**

**D: Hey. This is Demi, I know that we agreed that we'd reschedule but I sort of need you over here. I need you to look after Max.**

**T: Why?**

**D: It's too hard to explain. I'll tell you in a while. Just come over to babysit please?**

**T: Okay, I'll be there soon. Bye.**

**D: Thanks. Bye.**

I gave Selena her phone back and took a seat beside her.

"Sel. You're going to get help." I explained.

"What do you mean?"

I could see the fear on her face.

"You're going to rehab."

"No I can't!" she yelled.

"Sel. This isn't an option! You're going and that's final. You need help and I'm going to make sure you get it."

"No Demi. Please? I'm not ready."

"I know you don't want to but it's so important! You're going."

She started to cry and I comforted her the best I could. I hated it when she hurt. About five minutes later Taylor came walking through the door.

"Hey Taylor. We're going to set right off." Demi explained.

**Selena's POV**

Taylor looked asif she was going to hug me but to be honest, I wasn't in the mood. Demi was making me go to rehab! God knows how long I'll be there for but I know I'm going to hate it.

The car journey was quite and quick. It only took ten minutes but Dems had to put the address into the satnav so that was an extra five minutes.

"We're here." Demi told me.

I didn't give her a response I just exited the car and followed her into the entrance. It was bright in the reception. Reds, yellows, oranges I hated it. That's not how I felt at all. I felt cold, scared and very much alone. Demi left me to sit in the seats and went over to the desk.

"Hello. I phoned you earlier about my sister." Demi said.

Sister? Well I guess she wouldn't exactly say student/girlfriend.

"Oh yes. I remember, if you take your sister and just lead her through that door there, Mr Ryan will be waiting for you." The receptionist told her.

"Come on then Sel."

Demi took my hand reassuringly and led me to the door in which she'd been directed. We knocked and after being beckoned inside we were seated in front of him.

"Hello. How may I help you?" He asked.

"Well, my sister here needs some help. She's really struggling with some addictions as of now. I thought maybe if I just told her to stop and took everything away then she'd stop but it's not proving that simple."

"I see. Do you think I could talk to, what's her name?"

"It's Selena."

"Okay well do you think I could talk to Selena alone? You can just take a seat in the waiting area." He asked.

"Yes sure."

Demi walked out and left me alone with mr Ryan.

"So Selena, what's wrong?"

"I just have some things going on right now. Some stuff happened, I can't cope with it at all. I've thought about killing myself and I've gone so far with my cutting that I've blacked out. It's gone far beyond the point where I can just stop now. Like I can't help but do it. I really hate myself as everyone around me at the moment and I just want it all to end." I explained.

"Well its evident to me that there's some underlying issues so I think it's best that you stay here over night and then you can have your first session with our psychiatrist in the morning. I don't know how long you'll have to be here for but you will be able to have visitors." He reassured.

I didn't bother to reply I just got up and followed him out, he took Demi away into a corner and I guess he was filling her in.

About ten minutes later she came back over to me and took a hold of my hands.

"Selena. I'm going to be here to visit you every day with Max. I won't leave you alone I promise! You're going to get better and then you can come back to school."

I still didn't say anything. She pulled me in for a hug and I let the years fall.

"I'll bring you some clothes tommorow babe."

She kissed my cheek and then left. Just like that. A nurse approached me and led me towards a corridor, the hallway had about fifty rooms leading off of it. Each had a number on the door, and I guess these were the 'bedrooms'.

"You have a toilet and bathroom joined to your room so you should be all set. There's a bell on the inside of the door which you can ring if you need help. I will lock your door behind you so that you can't get out. I apologise if this seems sort of severe but it's just for safety, I will come and get you in the morning once you're awake and explain the rules. Do you want a shower? I can get you a towel."

That was a lot to take in.

"No I'm quite spent, I'll probably just sleep."

"Okay, do you want me to get you some night clothes?" She asked.

"No I'm okay thanks."

I gave her a weak smile and retreated into my room. I heard the lock click behind me and I suddenly felt very alone.

The room was quite nice to be honest, the bed was a double with a silk blanket. There was no window, obviously so I couldn't escape and the bathroom was quite luxurious.

I wasn't lying when I said I was tired, I laid down under the covers and soon sleep was engulfing me.


	19. I'm done with you

**Hey guys. Can you please check out my new oneshot called:**_** 'Perfect Two'**_

Friday

I woke up and reached over for Demi and then I remembered that she isn't here. No one I know is here. She just left me, she said that she'd always be there for me but yet she's not now. Where is she? She's at home with MY brother. I was about to press the buzzer when I felt the unfamiliar feeing in the pit of my stomach. Sick. I ran to the bathroom and let it all out in the toilet. That's what you get for drinking so much. I looked around trying to find a razor or something but there was nothing. Sort of obvious really, I don't know why I bother. As I was returning to my new bedroom the nurse from yesterday walked in.

"Ever heard of knock?" I asked.

Yes I was being a bitch but can you blame me?

"I'm sorry Selena."

"Yeah. Kay." I muttered.

She came fully in, closing the door behind her and took a seat on my bed. She patted the space beside her and I sat down.

"So I'm nurse Lisa."

"Okay."

I wasn't really in the mood for talking at all.

"Well anyway you will have a psychiatrist and his name is Dr. Abbots. He's a very kind and patient man, he'll get to the bottom of your problems. You'll have an appointment with him for about two hours every day. And that will start at one o'clock. He's just your physiatrist no one else's so if you need him or if it's an emergency then you press your buzzer and you can see him right away. He lives here you see. I will be your nurse for the whole time your here and again I'm just your nurse. Every patient has their own nurse and their own psychiatrist. I'll wake you up everyday at 9am, which is the time now. I'll take you to the cafeteria and I'll get you your breakfast. I'll sit with you while you eat to watch you. Then you come back here to wash. At eleven o'clock I come and get you and take you to the social room. The rest of the patients are taken there also, there are magazines and computers in there to entertain you or you can talk to the others. You'll be taken at twelve to then go have lunch, once again I'll sit with you while you eat that. Then it's your appointment with . At three o'clock you will go to the visiting room and you will stay in there for two hours with your visitor or visitors. At five o'clock you go to have dinner, I'll watch. You then go to the tv room till 7 o'clock. Then your locked back in your room. That's what your days will be like for the whole time your here. You're locked in every single room except for the cafeteria. The visiting, social and tv room all have locks and all have buzzers. We are very private and protective here. We have only ten patients here at the moment but we can have up to fifty. You ready to go now?" She asked.

Okay. This takes the piss! What of I don't want to go to the damn social room? What if I don't want to eat? I'm so pissed off at Demi right now, she's ruined everything!

"Yeah." I spat.

It was obvious that she was used to that tone. She stood up and led me out the room, I tried to look around and see if it was likely that I could break out but it was so secure.

In the cafeteria the food was all set out on the side. I was the last person in by the looks of it and everyone was staring at the 'new girl'. The food looked vile. I didn't want to eat any of it.

"Alright Selena. You can have cereal, toast or waffles?" Lisa offered.

The waffles were the only things that actually looked edible.

"Waffles." I grumbled.

She took a plate and piled two waffles on. No way could I eat all that! They were massive.

"Only one." I said.

"You're having two. Now orange juice or milk?"

That bitch!

"Milk."

She poured me a glass of milk and then told me to take a seat. I picked the chair that was furthest away from everyone else. I decided that I wouldn't argue I'd just eat up all the food quickly and then throw it all up when I get back into my room. I was ten within ten minutes tops.

"I'm ready. Can I go back now?" I asked sweetly.

"Sure." she replied.

She led me down a weird corridor that I didn't recognize.

"Where are we going?"

"Well I wasn't aware that you had problems with eating but it's evident that you do. So you won't be able to use your ensuite anymore you have to use the main shower room."

How the fuck did she know?

"I don't have problems with food!" I defended.

"Yes you do. I've worked with patients with your sorts of problems longer than I can remember. I know these things."

Stupid, professional know-it-all!

"I don't have a towel." I grunted.

"There are towels in the room."

We just reached the end of the hallway and she opened the door for me. Inside was about fifty cubicles with showers inside. There were only about five being used. Lisa reached inside a cupboard to her left and pulled out two towels. One for my body and one for my hair.

"Here you go. I will be waiting for you outside so just come out when you're ready."

I thought about just being sick on the shower floor but then they'd just find out. The smell would be a dead give away, and if they didn't hear from outside, one of the girls would be bound to snitch on me.

I stripped my clothes off and put them over the top of the cubicle so that they wouldn't get wet. The hot, steamy water hit my arm and radiated pain through my whole body, I was content. The fact that I couldn't self harm was killing me though. All I wanted to do was just slice my arm right through. Maybe I could end it all now, what have I even got left?

I stayed in the shower for about an hour. I don't know why I was in so long, maybe I liked the pressure of the water on my bruises or maybe I just wanted to make the bitch nurse have to wait.

By the time I was out and dressed it was five to eleven.

"Finally you're out! Come on its time for the social room." Lisa told me.

I didn't want to go to the 'social' room at all. I'd much rather just stay in my own room. As soon as I entered I heard the door lock behind me. Everyone was staring and looking my way, well when I say everyone I mean the four girls in there.

"Hi my name's Carter, this is Rosie, that's Mary and over there is Cordelia." A cute, tom-boyish girl told me.

"Hey I'm Selena." I greeted.

I took a seat on one of the bean bags and grabbed a magazine.

"So what are you in here for?" Mary asked.

The rest of the girls were all engrossed in what they were doing so no one was paying any attention to me or Mary.

"Don't feel like saying."

"When did you get here? You weren't around last night?"

"I was. Just after you guys had dinner so you didn't see me. I think it was like 6 when I arrived."

"Oh cool. So how long are you going to be here?"

"I really have no clue."

"Don't feel like talking huh?" She chuckled.

"Not really."

"Are you missing home?"

"Yes."

"School?"

"Not at all. I wouldn't care if I never went back there."

"Why?"

She actually seemed concerned so why not tell her?

"A few people make my life hell there, none of the teachers like me. Something happened and it seems like I'm getting all the blame."

"What happened?"

"You'll never know. I'm not talking about it."

"You have to talk to your psychiatrist about it though."

"No I won't."

"Don't you want to get better?"

"I don't care." I admitted.

"You will though." She stated.

"How do you know?"

"I've been here two weeks. I'm leaving soon. But when I first got here, I was silent. I wouldn't talk to anyone, that got me nowhere."

"Maybe I don't want to get anywhere."

"Do you want to leave here?" She asked.

"Yes."

I really did hate it.

"Then you're going to have to talk."

She got up and left me at that point. I decided to just read a magazine, I'd find one that was interesting and focus all my attention on just that. I was reading for like half an hour, the story was all about Debby Ryan! I absolutely love Debby with passion.

Once I had finished the whole magazine I decided to have a look at Facebook. Big Mistake! I had about fifty inboxes all from people having a go at me about Stacey. They said stuff like 'You're such a psycho!' and 'I'm glad you're gone!' and 'Just wait till you get back to school.'

The last one effected me the most if I'm honest. What were they going to do to me? Maybe I should just stay here, if I'm in rehab then I can't be at school and they can't hurt me. It pisses me off so much though that Stacey was in the wrong and I'm getting all the blame! I was about to reply to them all when Lisa came back into the room.

"Log off now, it's time for lunch."

I logged off and then followed her to the cafeteria. I had to have two cheese sandwiches, they were on white bread which I hate! And she also made me have a fizzy drink. Why the bitch wouldn't let me have water is beyond me.

"Eat it all up, that's a good girl."

How old does she think I am? I decided that I wouldn't though. I'm not going to pay any attention to her. I just sat there staring at the food for the whole hour. She tried to make me eat but I wouldn't. I refused.

"Since you're being such a disobedient child I will take you straight to your room after tea! No tv!"

"Oh no! I'm so sad!" my words were dripping with sarcasm.

She looked like she wanted to slap me silly but of course she couldn't so she settled for grabbing my arm and dragging me to the psychiatrist office.

"I'll come and get you in two hours." She spat.

I walked into the room and didn't even bother to knock.

"Ahh Selena, do sit."

He motioned for me to take a seat in front of him and I obliged.

"So, explain why you're here."

"My sister made me."

"Why?"

"I don't know. You should ask her."

"I'm sure you do know."

"Nope."

"Are you going to tell me anything?"

"Nope."

"Selena? I can't help you if you won't let me."

"Who said I wanted help?" I yelled.

"Calm down!" He ordered.

I settled in my seat and just glared at him.

"You won't be able to leave until you're better, company policy."

"It's going to be a while."

"Looks like it. How old are you?"

"Sixteen, why?"

"I'm profiling you. Why is your sister worried about you?"

"I already said I wasn't talking about that."

It went back and forth like this until the two hours were up. Him trying to find out more about me and me denying him the chance.

"Your time is up, I'll see you tomorrow Selena." Dr Abbotts informed me.

"Yeah, Kay."

I left the room and greeted Lisa.

"Your brother and sister are here."

Max! I hadn't had the chance to say goodbye. I practically ran to the visiting room and was relieved, for once, when I heard the click of the lock.

"Lena!" He yelled.

"Maxy!"

I picked him up and swirled him through the air, then I held him close to my chest like I would never let go.

"I missed you buddy."

"Me too. When are you coming home? Dems says it may be a while."

"Oh did she. Hey go play with those toys a minute, okay?"

"Okay."

I put him down and watched him run away, then I took a seat by Demi.

"How you doing babe?" She asked me.

"Don't call me babe!"

"Why?"

"I don't even want to be near you right now."

"I was trying to help!"

"How was that going to help Demi? I needed you to help me through this and now you're not even around. You just couldn't be bothered to help me so you pawned me off with these pricks!" I screamed.

"Calm down!"

"No! You don't get to tell me what to do. I can't even be bothered with you anymore. Do you know what there saying at school? They're threatening me, they're saying it's all my fault! But it's not! It's yours and Taylor's! Stacey wouldn't even hate if I'd never have made friends with Taylor and I would never have gotten this bad if you'd never have left me Saturday when I needed you! You're a shit excuse for a girlfriend."

Tears were pouring down her face and I knew that I'd gone too far but I couldn't bring myself to care.

"You don't mean that." She whispered.

"Don't I? Tomorrow I don't want to see you! I want to see Max. I'm done with you."

"What does that mean?"

"It means I'm done!"

I got up and went to play with Max, wiping the tears from my face. I spent the rest of the visiting hours playing cars and I didn't want it to end but soon Lisa came in and I knew it had to.

"Max you have to go now but I'm going to see you tomorrow buddy, okay?"

"Okay Lena."

"I love you Max."

"I love you too."

I gave him a bug hug and watched him walk away with Demi.

"It's time for tea." Lisa announced.

"I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat!"

"I said I wasn't hungry!"

I ran past her and straight to my room I threw myself down on the bed and cried myself to sleep.

_**Okay guys. Next chapter will be in Demi's POV and will be set back at the house. Review please?:')**_


	20. She was mere inches away from my lips

_**Demi's POV**_

Max came into my room at about ten, which is quite late for him, and woke me up.

"Demi! When are we going to see Selena? I miss her!" He asked.

Just hearing her name made my heart ache. What had I done? I'd ruined everything, I've ruined her. It is all my fault.

"We don't leave here until half two so that's four and a half hours away." I explained.

"Aww but I want Lena."

"I know little man, so do I."

The realisation that she'd broken up with me was still yet to take full effect.

"Why is she gone?" He asked.

"She's feeling very ill. So she has to get better."

"How long is it going to take?"

"I don't know."

Sitting here talking about her, after everything that was said, was just too hard. I had to change the subject and fast.

"Okay Maxy, you've got to have a shower now and then we can have breakfast."

"Alright."

I went into his room to collect the towels and he went to go get the shower ready. By the time I got into the bathroom he was undressing.

"I'll leave your towel here then. Just come and get me when you're out, okay?"

"I will."

I left the room so he could have his shower in peace and then went back to the room that I'd been staying in. I felt quite lost and alone, I don't have any friends out here. I have no one to talk to. The only thing I was even remotely interested in was getting Sel back. I had to find a way to make her forgive me, but how? The only way I'd ever been able to speak my mind completely was through song. Selena doesn't know that I write or sing, that's her thing but maybe that's what I need. Maybe if I apologise through song she'll understand more.

I want her to know that I didn't leave her, that I didn't give up on her. I sent her away because just watching her mess up her life like that was killing me. Just watching her hurting was ruining me. I just want her to go back to the healthy, mischievous girl that she was before, the girl that I fell for. So I'll write this song and I'll sing it to her! I refuse to give up on us.

"Demi I'm dressed." Max told me as he walked into the room.

"All by yourself? Well done!" I beamed.

"I'm getting so big!"

"Yeah you are."

He really is cute, at least I have him around to cheer me up.

"Want to go get breakfast now?" I suggested.

"Yeah."

I took his hand and led him downstairs, leaving him on the sofa to watch tv.

"Cocopops?"

"Yeah please."

I finished up the cereal and handed it to him. Just as I was cleaning the kitchen up I caught a glimpse of the garden furniture in the hall.

"Hey Max when you're done with your cereal do you want to sort out the garden furniture?" I asked.

"Yes!" He exclaimed.

I knew that he'd be very excited with the offer and if he was out in the garden playing, it would give me time to write my song. I'll know that he's safe and I won't have to worry about not watching him.

"We'll do that when you're finished then."

I grabbed the big boxes and dragged then all outside, ready for building. I locked the back gate so that no one could get in or out, I wanted to be safe. I'd just moved the last box when Max came running out.

"Which one first Maxy?"

"The trampoline!"

We still had three and a half hours till we had to leave so I figured we'd get at least two built.

We emptied the entire contents of the box out onto the floor. I glanced over the instructions so that I could get the gist of what we had to do. I'd built one of these trampolines back in America for my best friends daughter. Everything was so much simpler then.

All we had to do was build the three legs which were made when you attach the three main poles together. Once that was completed you had to attach all the springs onto the slits and then the stretchy fabric was slid on. It took us about an hour just to complete those steps. All we had left to do was the net for safety, that was simple enough, you just fasten on the three poles and attach the safety barrier.

"That's the trampoline done, what next?" i asked.

He was looking at the bouncing object in complete awe and I don't even think he registered that I'd spoken. I decided to shake him a little.

"Max?"

"Wha- huh?"

"You can play on it if you want? I'll build the next one on my own."

"Thank you! Thank you!"

He was about to jump on when I stopped him.

"Wait a minute, I have to check if it's safe."

I didn't want the thing to break beneath him so I hopped on to test it out. It was very secure and wasn't making any unusual sounds so I beckoned Max to join me. He jumped on similar to how I had and then I got off, fastening the net up.

I still had two hours before I had to drive Max to Lena. So I decided to start on the swing and see-saw. I once again emptied the contents all over the floor. The see-saw was just a pyramid shapes metal block which was secured into the floor with nails and then a big, smooth plank of wood which was fastened onto the block. There were a lot of nails and a lot of safety checks but eventually it was finished and safe enough to ride. I started to make the swing right beside it. All you had to do was take two wooden poles and screw them together in a pyramid style, then nail it into the grass. You then had to repeat that procedure but this time nail it opposite the other. I then joined the two beams together right at the top with a thick metal bar. The swing was tied very strongly onto the metal bar. I once again tested it to make sure it was safe for Max.

Once I was done with that I glance at my watch and saw that it was two twenty-five.

"Off now Max we have to go to Lena." I told him.

The second I mentioned Selena's name he was off the trampoline at once. We were in the car on the way to the rehab centre by half past and we were right on time.

**Selena's POV**

I was sitting in the office with Dr Abbots and I was so bored. I only had like half an hour left though so I think I could bear it.

"You haven't eaten anything at all today." He stated.

"Yeah I know. I haven't been hungry."

"Course you have. You may as well not bother lying to me because i have met your sorts before."

"Oh yeah? And what sorts are they?"

"The sort where I can tell you want to get better. You're just being stubborn, something's made you feel like you can't get better or that you don't deserve to but you need to get better! If you don't then you're going to completely ruin your life. You'll ruin your sisters life, your brothers life."

"Don't even mention my 'sister' in here." I spat.

"So you have some hostility towards her?"

"This is supposed to be about me and my recovery!"

"Well maybe she has something to do with your recovery?"

"No the fucking twats from school and my parents are the reason that I need to recover, it has jack shit to do with her!" I exploded.

"Now we're getting somewhere. What happened at school or with your parents?"

"Forget it. The times up now I'm going."

I got up and left the room meeting Lisa by the exit.

"Max and Demi are here." She informed me.

"I only want to see Max."

"Oh okay then. This way."

She led me to the visiting room and luckily Demi was no where to be seen.

"Max!"

"Lena!"

He charged at me and he spun him round similar to how I had the day before. I know that it's only been a day since I last saw him but it felt like so much longer.

"I missed you!" I told him.

"I missed you too. Me and Demi put up some of the garden toys and they're so fun!"

It pissed me off to know that Demi was at home spending time with my brother and doing things that I'd said I'd do.

"Did she? What did you build?"

"The trampoline, the see-saw and the swing."

I was trying so hard to hold back the tears. It really hurt.

"Oh. Well you can tell Demi to leave the playhouse."

I wanted at least something to do whenever I got out.

"Alright, why isn't Demi in here?"

"I don't want to see her now."

"Why not?"

"I just don't max!"

"When are you coming home?"

"Not for a while yet bud."

"I want you to come home now!"

"I know but for the mean time we can just talk and play here." I smiled.

He led me over to the exact same cars as he had the day before and we played for the whole two hours. It didn't seem like it was that long but it was. Lisa came in and took him away, I just stayed in the room and cried. I didn't want him to go, I wanted my baby brother to stay with me.

"Selena, are you going to eat now?"

"Is Rosie eating?"

She looked at me knowingly.

"Yes."

"Then yeah, I'm eating." I said.

I followed her down to the cafeteria and sat down beside Rosie. I left Lisa to get my food because I couldn't be bothered.

"Hey Selena." She greeted.

"Hey." I replied.

_***Flashback to earlier in the day in the social room***_

_I walked into the social room and noticed that one of the girls I'd been introduced to yesterday was sitting alone. Now that I got a proper look at her she was actually quite pretty. She looked a lot like Demi if I was honest. That's when I thought of Demi and what i'd said to her the day before, I'd said we were over. Did I mean it? I don't know. But Rosie's pretty..._

_I went up and sat beside her._

_"Hey."_

_"Hello. Selena right?" She guessed._

_"Yeah that's the name, you're Rosie aren't you?"_

_Even though I knew that she was._

_"That's me." She smiled._

_She was cute when she smiled._

_"You're quite hot." I complemented._

_I didn't know what I was doing. I still loved Demi but I was mad at her and right know this seemed to make sense._

_"You're not so bad yourself." _

_"Brave. I like it."_

_"What are you in for?" She questioned._

_I had no intention of letting her know the reason so I just dodged the question._

_"So how old are you? I asked._

_She caught on straight away and decided not to press the matter._

_"15 you?" _

_"I'm 16." I said, "So are you a lesbian then?"_

_"Yeah, you?"_

_"Yep."_

_She stood up and I thought she was going to walk away but instead she sat herself down on my lap so that she was straddling me. She was mere inches away from my lips when she spoke._

_"Good."_

_She brought her lips the final distance so there was absolutely no space between us. Her lips were on mine and our bodies were pressed together. It didn't feel anything like it did with Demi. It was unfamiliar, not nasty but not what i wanted either. She was about to slip her tongue into my mouth when I ended it._

_"Look I have to go." _

_My daily time I had to spend in the social room was nowhere near up but I had to get away. I ignored Lisa's protests and wait straight to my room._

_As I sat on my bed I thought back to what had just happened. I was with Demi wasn't I? Was that over? I didn't really want it to be over... Or did I? I'm mad at her I know that! But am I mad enough to suddenly get with some other girl? Did I just cheat on Demi? Did I turn into something that I said I'd never be. Shit! What was I going to do?_

_**End flashback**_

"So you ran away pretty quick yesterday, what was with that?" She asked.

I'd decided what I was going to do whilst I was with the psychiatrist.

"Sorry. I needed the toilet. We can spend some more time together tomorrow, for sure." I smiled.

I didn't want to hurt Demi, not at all. But I wasn't the girl she fell in love with anymore, maybe she'd be better off without me.

**Review?:)**


	21. Well well

_**Selena's POV - Sunday **_

I woke up and glanced at the clock, it read '8:50'. I still had ten minutes until Lisa would come into my room and let me out. It was then that my stomach decided to tell me I needed to puke. The toilet in my room was still locked as I wasn't to be trusted, whatever that meant. I had to settle for the bin which was situated in the corner of the room, unfortunately that left the disgusting stench in the air. By the time I was done emptying my stomach it was nine.

"You'll never learn will you?" Lisa scolded.

"What?"

"You can't just make yourself sick! You're in here to be treated."

Oh so she thought that it was forced.

"I didn't make myself sick, I feel ill."

"Yeah okay because that's a likely story."

"No seriously, I promise."

She looked at me sceptically. I don't think she believed me but I was being honest!

"Just come to breakfast."

I was actually hungry and I wasn't in the mood to be difficult so I decided that I'd eat. I chose rice krispies and a glass of orange juice, then I sat next to Rosie.

"Hey Rosie." I smiled.

"Selena! Hey."

"Did you have a nice sleep?"

"Yep I was thinking about you." She flirted.

"Good things?" I winked.

I was really playing along, I guess me and Demi are really done.

"Just about how I want to lick you all over like you're ice-cream and fuck you until you can't walk." She whispered.

"Well, maybe we should make that happen." I teased.

"We really should."

This playful banter carried on until we were done with our breakfast. Then Lisa, and Rosie's nurse, Rachel came over and got us ready to go to the showers.

"Ten minutes." Lisa told us from outside the bathrooms.

"Tops." Rachel added.

Me and Rosie shrugged off there warnings and entered a cubicle. When I say 'a cubicle' that does mean we were together. There was a voice in the back of my head telling me to just get out and go. Don't do what your about to do, what about Demi? But then again I'm done with her.

"Ready to strip?" I asked.

"Oh I'm ready."

I cautiously stepped forward so that our bodies were meshed together. I silently asked for permission and once she gave me the go ahead I peeled her top off of her slim figure. I took her bra covered chest into pure view and just admired the beauty. She then did the exact same thing to me and discarded my top. She was shocked as soon as she noticed my arm but I just shook my head, to warn her not to ask.

"Are you sure you wanna do this?" She checked.

"I'm sure."

The second I said those words her mouth was hungrily savaging my neck. She soon found my pulse point and began to press constant pressure, causing me to moan out in pleasure. I connected our lips for the first time that day. It was a fiery kiss, no love what-so-ever.

As we were kissing I felt her hands groping my breasts...

_**Flashback**_

_**'Well well.' **_

_**Before pulling my underwear to the side he roughly grabbed a boob in each of his hands and just squeezed. It felt horrible his large, manly hands made me shudder at the slightest touch.**_

"Rosie stop!" I screamed.

She looked at me with shock radiating from her eyes.

"Just stop." I cried.

She tried to pull me close and hug me but I just pushed her away and screamed. It wasn't long before both Lisa and Rachel were running in, all the nurses had keys for the cubicles so they just unlocked the door. Their first reaction was angry because we were both there with no tops on, me with a massive hickey on my neck. But then they saw the state I was in, I'd sat down on the floor with my knees clutched to my chest, shaking and sobbing.

"Selena hunny, what happened?" Lisa soothed.

I completely ignored her words. She tried to reach out to me but once again I screamed.

"What did you do, Rosie?" Rachel ordered.

"Nothing I swear. We were like kissing and stuff and then she freaked out and I stopped." She defended.

"Let's just go sweetie."

Rachel led Rosie out of the cubicle but that was the last thought on my mind.

"Your arm, is that why you're in here?"

I tried my hardest to nod.

"But that's not the only reason right?"

Once again I tried my hardest to shake my head.

"I'm going to take you to Dr Abbots right now, you need to let me help you, okay?"

She reached out her hand and placed it on my upper arm, this time I decided that I'd let her. She carefully led me to his office all the time I still couldn't stop crying.

She knocked on the big oak door and then we walked in.

"Aww Selena, what can I do for you?"

I was in no fit state to answer so Lisa did.

"I think she needs to talk right now."

He nodded in understanding and then she leaves.

"Selena what happened?"

"It..it...they." I couldn't seem to get it out.

"Who?"

"The people from school. That boy and...and...Miley."

"What did the boy do?"

I started to shake once again and the tears started to pour down my face. I used the towel, which was now around my shoulders to cover my bra, to wipe the tears that fell.

"He ra...ra...raped me."

"Who Selena?" He asked softly.

"Cameron. It was horrible and I just I didn't want it to happen b...b...but it did and n...n...now I can't forget it."

"That's why you're here right?"

"That and t...t...this." I motioned to my arm.

"Selena, you have to talk about this because for the three days you've been here I haven't even helped you. I had no clue what was happening."

"I...I...I know."

"Explain it to me."

"Well I ha...ha...had this friend Mi...Mi...Miley but then we got ca...ca...caught kissing and now she ha...ha...hates me. Apparently she wasn't even m...m...my friend to start with and she w...wa...was just pretending beca...becaus...because her friend Stacey got her too because I app...app...apparently stole her fr...fr...friend Taylor. Anyway to get back at m...m...me she got Cameron to rape me. I hated it and now I ca...ca...can't stop thinking about I...I...it. I have well I guess had a g...g...girlfriend and she's so sweet but it's all m...m...messed me up and I can't like act right a...a...around her. I can't tell her or T...T...Taylor what happened because I'm sc...sc...scared and I don't like reliving it. I think I've screwed I...I...it up now though because I...I...I was kissing Rosie and we got as far as taking o...o...our tops off. What am I supposed to do now? I want De... I need her now m...m...more than anything!" I stressed.

"This is going to take a lot Selena. You'll probably be here for about another two and maybe a bit weeks but I can help you. I can get it back to normal for you. And as for your girlfriend you need to tell her the truth, and just see how she takes it."

His advice really did make sense and it gave me hope knowing that I was going to get better.

"Thank you so much, doctor! Can we leave it for today now please? I can go back to bed right?" I hoped.

"Of course, it's one o'clock and you can use our three hour session that we should have to relax in your room." He assured

I got up and left the room.

"Are you okay now?" Lisa asked.

"Yeah. I'm going back to my room now."

"Okay then."

She led me back to my room and locked me in.

I had to tell Demi all about Rosie, I didn't know what she was going to do or say. I'd already technically ended it but I think we both knew it wasn't real, it wasn't really over for good. What if I tell her in a bit when I see her and she decides that she doesn't want to be with me. How am I even going to tell her? I screwed up and I don't think I want to see the look on her face when I tell her what I did. The only way I know how to express myself fully is through music. If I write a quick rough song now, I can sing it to her.

The song has to explain that I went wrong, that I've ruined everything. But I'm going to fix it.

_**Ohh,**_

_**Here I am,**_

_**Feels like the walls are closing in,**_

_**Once again it's time to face it and be strong,**_

_**I wanna do the right thing now,**_

_**I know it's up to me some how,**_

_**I've lost my way.**_

_**If I could take it all back I would now,  
I never meant to let you all down,  
And now I've got to try to turn it all around,  
And figure out how to fix this,  
I know there's a way so I promise,  
I'm gonna clean up this mess I made,  
Maybe It's not to late,  
Maybe it's not to late oh.**_

_**So I'll take a stand,  
Even though it's complicated,  
If I can I wanna change the way I've made it,  
I gotta do the right thing now,  
I know it's up to me some how,  
I'll find my way.**_

If I could take it all back I would now,  
I never meant to let you all down,  
And now I've got to try to turn it all around,  
And figure out how to fix this,  
I know there's a way so I promise,  
I'm gonna clean up the mess I made,  
Maybe It's not to late.

It has to tell her that even though I'm scared and struggling, it's still going to be okay.

_**I'm gonna find the strength,**_

_**To be the one who that holds it all together,  
Show you that I'm sorry,  
But I know that we can make it better.**_

If I could take it all back I would now,  
I never meant to let you all down,  
And now I've got to try to turn it all around,  
And figure out how to fix this,  
I know there's a way so I promise,  
I'm gonna clean up the mess I made,  
Maybe It's not to late.

Because its not too late.

"Your visitors are here." Lisa interrupted.

"Okay."

I grabbed my songbook, my notes and my guitar and then followed her out of the room. As I entered I noticed that Demi wasn't there, of course she wasn't.

"Lisa. Wait." I shouted just before she'd shut the door.

"Yeah?"

"I want Demi."

She left the room and then like two minutes later Demi walked in. I turned my back to her and bent down so I was the same height as Maxy.

"Bud, I'm going to talk to Demi and I'll come and play with you in a bit, okay?"

"Okay Lena."

He ran off and me and Demi sat down at the table.

"I have to tell you something but first I want to sing you a song I wrote."

She watched me intently as I began to strum, half way through the song I started to cry and she joined me. By the time I was finished my entire face was tear stained. I don't know if it was because of the song or just the fact that I knew what I had to do after.

"Demi I've let you down." I said.

"You haven't babes. It's okay, I don't blame you and you're going to get better." She smiled.

"No there's something else. I've really let you down." I cried.

"What did you do?"

"I love you so much and I don't know why I did it, it wasn't right and it didn't feel like it did with us. I didn't like it, I'm so sorry."

"What did you fucking do?" She snapped.

"There's this girl Rosie, I kissed her and she felt me up without my top on." I whispered.

"She what?"

"Demi I'm so sorry! I regret it so much, I shouldn't have done it!"

"Selena what hurts the most is that you hadn't done anything like that before it was going to be something special that I could share with you!"

"No! It was never gonna happen like that! My innocence was long gone when I got here, he made sure of that!"

"What? Who?"

"Forget it."

I was crying a lot more now.

"Tell me. Did some boy touch you?"

"Just forget it!"

"Selena?" She yelled.

"Just shut up! I said forget it, I don't want to talk!" I screamed.

I got up and ran out leaving Max and Demi alone in the room.

_**Reviews?:)**_


	22. As long as you love me

_**Demi's Pov - Monday**_

I should be beyond pissed at Selena, she cheated on me for fucks sake, but I'm not. I can't bring myself to even think a single bad thing about her. It's way worse than I ever thought it was. I'm almost certain that she was raped now, or at least sexually assaulted in some way. How could I have not known though? I bet I know when it was as well, that day when I found her in the bathroom. That would explain the bruises. Who did it though? It couldn't have been Miley or Stacey because they're not men and she was talking about a man yesterday but I'm willing to bet that they had something to do with it. Maybe it was that dick Steven, that's why she didn't want to go to R.E! Or was it Cameron, she had that sort of altercation with him like a week ago in my classroom. I can't jump to conclusions but I will find out who did it and I will make them pay. For right now though, I have to be there for Sel. I have no clue what she's going through right now but she needs me. I can't pressure her into telling me what happened, she'll tell me when she's ready. I was the one that made all this worse in the first place, I went in a mood with her just because she wouldn't tell me. I can't imagine how she felt.

"Demi! It's eight we have to get ready!" Max shouted as he ran into my room.

I wasn't going to school today, I was staying home to work on that song.

"I'm feeling ill so I'm not going, go get dressed and I'll be up to do your breakfast soon."

He ran off and I dragged my lazy ass up out of bed. Yesterday when Selena had screamed at me it really scared Max. I don't think he was expecting it and I don't think he liked it either.

"What you eating monster?"

"Waffles!" He shouted.

I went shopping yesterday and re-stocked the house, I still haven't built the play house because I know that Selena wants to do it. I heated the waffles in the microwave and left them on the table for Max. Then I went into the lounge room to watch tv. Five minutes later he was at the table and scoffing the food down his throat. Someone's hungry.

"I don't wanna be late today."

"We won't be late don't worry."

"I'm nearly done. Can you pack my bag while I just finish?"

"Okay then bud."

I grabbed his bag from off the counter and piled all his school work that he needed into it. I then made him his usual lunch and placed that in there as well.

"Your bags all set." I told him.

"Then let's go."

I was still in my pajamas but I didn't mind, I held his hand and locked the door behind me. I got a few dodgy looks from some of the moms at his school but it didn't faze me. I wasn't paying them any attention what so ever.

As soon as I got back to home I rang the school and called in sick, they weren't happy but there was no way I could face any of the people that did this to Selena.

The second I was done on the phone I grabbed my notebook and sat down. I wanted to tell Sel that I was hurt after what she did, that I was heartbroken when I found out about Rosie. Then I want to tell her that as long as she loves me that's all that matters. Thats what I'll call the song 'as long as you love me'.

_**We're under pressure,**_

_**Seven billion people in the world trying to fit in,**_

_**Keep it together,**_

_**Smile on your face even though your heart is frowning,**_

_**But hey now, you know, girl,**_

_**We both know it's a cruel world,**_

_**But I will take my chances.**_

This is telling her that even though the world is screwed up and that she's going through a lot right now that doesn't mean that we shouldn't keep trying.

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**We could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke,**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**I'll be your platinum, I'll be your silver, I'll be your gold,**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me),**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me).**_

This is telling her that as long as we love each other and stick together than it doesn't really matter what life throws at us.

_**I'll be your soldier,**_

_**Fighting every second of the day for your dreams, girl,**_

_**I'll be your Hova,**_

_**You can be my Destiny's Child on the scene girl,**_

_**So don't stress, don't cry, we don't need no wings to fly,**_

_**Just take my hand.**_

This means that I'll be there for her every single step of the way. No matter what she's going through I'll help her.

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**We could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke,**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**I'll be your platinum, I'll be your silver, I'll be your gold,**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me),**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me).**_

I threw my pen down and scanned over what I had written. It really got my point across and it was well written. I got back from taking Max at nine and its now eleven so I spent two hours writing that song. I still had three hours and half until I actually had to leave to visit her so I decided that I'd make myself some breakfast.

I had the same as Max and heated myself some waffles. It was weird being in the house all alone, especially when it's not really my house. It's Selena's house, but she can't be here. I really do miss my beautiful girl, I absolutely love everything about her and I can't picture my life without her in it so I have to help her. She's going to get better and I'm going to be there to help her.

**Selena's POV**

I'd just finished lunch and now I was on my way to Dr Abbotts. I was scared because I know that today I'm actually going to talk. I'm actually going to begin my healing process.

"You can go in now sweetie." Lisa said.

I opened the door and took my normal seat opposite his desk.

"How are you today?" He asked.

"Not good."

"What's happened?"

"Well I don't know if I can tell you."

"I can't help if you won't tell me."

"Everything I say in here is confidential, right?"

"Yes. Literally everything you say, no matter what it is."

"So say if I was dating someone I shouldn't you can't tell anyone?"

"Well no not really. Just like I can't tell anyone about you being raped without your permission."

"Okay, I'll tell you then."

"I'm all ears."

"Demi isn't really my sister, she's my girlfriend."

"Oh well what's wrong with that? You're sixteen and you're of legal age?"

"She's my teacher."

"I see, well normally I would really frown upon this sort of relationship but to be honest I didn't think she was your sister. You have a bigger bond and she obviously cares about you otherwise you wouldn't even be here." He explained.

"I really love her it's just I think I've practically messed it up."

"How?"

"Well after the rape I sort of clammed up. I was different. She sort of get fed up because I was moody, distant and I wouldn't tell her what's up. Then she got really mad and just left, that's when I cut for the first time and it got so addicting. Cameron, the guy that raped me, had left bruises all on my stomach and I looked like absolute shit, so I started to be sick to try and wear away the bruises. The being sick thing isn't really a problem in all honesty, I actually do feel ill when I wake up and that's why I'm sick, I don't force it any more. It's just with all the shit that happened with Rosie I think I've screwed it all up."

"Talk to her when she comes tonight, if he loves you as much as you love her, which I'm guessing she will then it will be fine. And as for the rape just let her know that you'll tell her when you're ready."

"Okay I will." I smiled.

"Now, I am going to help you with your self-harm addiction. But as for the throwing up, you don't seem ill so describe what happens when you wake up, did it happen this morning?"

"Yeah it did. Basically I just wake up and then suddenly I feel really ill and I just have to be sick."

"When were you raped?"

"Umm it was like a week and four days ago."

"Did he use a condom?"

Shit.

"Umm no."

"Is there a possibility you could be pregnant?"

Double shit.

"Yeah."

"People can get morning sickness straight away but it won't come up on the test until at least two weeks so you can't take the test just yet."

"I can't be pregnant!"

"Selena you might not be, lets not get yourself worked up."

"What happens if I am? I'm sixteen. My mom and dad left, I have little Maxy to look after and I don't know if Demi is gonna stick around after she's heard this."

"Where have your mom and dad gone? Who's Maxy? And of course she will! She's not going to leave you just because you were raped."

"I don't know where they've gone, they just left me. Max is my little brother, he's only four and I have him to look after. What of Demi decides that I'm too much work and that I'm not worth the hassle. I can't do this on my own!"

"You won't be on your own. You'll never be on your own. Don't worry."

"Okay."

No matter how many times he tells me not to worry, I'm still going to.

"Our three hours are up and we've had quite a lot to talk about today. But tomorrow we're going to focus on your arm, okay?"

"Alright. Bye."

"Bye.

I smiled at the doctor and then left his office. Lisa escorted me to the visitation room and I was honestly scared. What of Demi wasn't there? What of she hates me?

But she was there, already sitting at the table waiting for me. Max was in the corner with the toys, I guess she told him to sit there for a bit.

"Hi." I whispered.

"Hey."

"Demi I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault Sel and I'm not mad."

"You're not?"

"No, you've obviously got serious problems and I think I already know what happened after your outburst but you don't have to tell me until you're ready. I'm not leaving you though, no way! I'm going to be here with you while you get better and I'm still going to be here after. It's past the point where I like you, I love you. If you're not happy then I'm not."

I was crying. Tears pouring down my face, she doesn't hate me! She's still going to be by my side.

"I've written you a song."

Wait. What? She writes?

"You write?"

"Yeah. I know it's normally your thing but this once I wanted to express my love for you."

Aww.

"_**We're under pressure,**_

_**Seven billion people in the world trying to fit in,**_

_**Keep it together,**_

_**Smile on your face even though your heart is frowning,**_

_**But hey now, you know, girl,**_

_**We both know it's a cruel world,**_

_**But I will take my chances.**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**We could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke,**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**I'll be your platinum, I'll be your silver, I'll be your gold,**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me),**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me).**_

_**I'll be your soldier,**_

_**Fighting every second of the day for your dreams, girl,**_

_**I'll be your Hova,**_

_**You can be my Destiny's Child on the scene girl,**_

_**So don't stress, don't cry, we don't need no wings to fly,**_

_**Just take my hand.**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**We could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke,**_

_**As long as you love me,**_

_**I'll be your platinum, I'll be your silver, I'll be your gold,**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me),**_

_**As long as you love, love, love, love me (love me)."**_

"I love you so much Dems."

"And I love you too."

I got up and sat on her lap. It feels like its been so long since I've been this close to her and I missed it so much.

"I missed this." I murdered.

"Missed what?"

"Just being this close with you."

"I missed it too. When you get out of here we'll invite Taylor round and we'll have a big girly night plus Max."

"Mmm... That sounds perf." I smiled.

"It really does."

I brought our lips close together and we shared a sweet.

"You're not shouting."

I looked to my left side and saw Max standing there.

"No more shouting Maxy. We're fine now. Come here."

I picked him up and placed him on my lap. The three of us shared a massive hug. It was just like it was when we all slept together on our bed, it was just like the old days. Yep, I'm going to be fine and it's going to be okay again.

**Review please?;)**


	23. Always

**Tuesday - Selena's POV **

Today is my first official day of treatment. I decided two days ago that I was going to get better but I'm only just starting. I'm going to eat EVERY meal given to me today and I'm going to listen to everything Dr Abbotts says. It should be about two weeks and a day till I leave but that's only approximate.

The only thing getting me down is the fact that I could possibly be pregnant. I am absolutely shitting myself to be blunt. What if I am? I'm not ready to be a mom. Will I love the baby considering it will be Cameron's? I think I'll cry if I am like seriously. Just when I think everything's going well and good it gets screwed up. On the bright side all it takes is having Demi around and I completely forget about it all. Just like last night.

"Selena dear it's nine now." Lisa said to me as she opened the door.

"Alright then."

I jumped up out of bed feeling very positive, no sickness this morning. I wonder what's for breakfast today? I walked down the corridor beside Lisa and then when we arrived in the cafeteria I darted right for the food. My choices were pancakes, toast or cereal. Pancakes definitely. The drinks choices were milk, orange juice or apple juice. Definitely orange juice. Mmm... Refreshing.

I placed my tray down on the table next to Rosie and took my seat.

"Hey. I'm sorry about the other day Rose."

"It's okay Sel. We can go again?" She flirted.

"No I'm sorry. I'm done messing around." I apologised.

"Oh right. I get it."

She was upset.

"You're the only one I really know in here though so can we stay friends?" I pleaded.

"Of course we can babe." She smiled.

"Good."

Me and Rosie are still friends, Demi and me are great and Max is safe and happy. Everything great except for my possible pregnancy...

I stayed in the cafeteria until ten so that I could chat, eat it all and act normally as if everything was all good. That's the best way to recover. If I act like nothing's wrong.

"Shower time."

I got up and walked off with Lisa. I was a right bitch to her at the beginning of all of this but she's actually a really sweet girl.

"Can I use new towels today please, Lis?"

"Yeah course Sel."

The towels were so soft and were kept in the cupboard right next to the door. I grabbed two and entered the closest cubicle. I always have long showers, they make me feel peaceful and it's quite.

I undressed and stared straight at my arm, I still had an urge to bite and scratch at it but it wasn't as strong an urge as it used to be. I felt sick and ill just looking it at, seeing what I'd let my life get like. An hour later I forced myself to leave, I didn't want to get out and leave the warmth and comfort of the water.

"Okay Lisa, I'm ready to go to the social room."

She led me to the door and I waited for the click before taking a seat in front of one of the computers. It was time for me to de-activate Facebook, I always loved having an account but now people were just using it to get at me and hurl abuse. The bad thing is though, is that I have to log on to de-activate it and I'm going to end up seeing it all.

It's gotten worse since I last checked I had 55 notifications and 78 messages. All where just people saying things like: 'go kill yourself' which really hurt considering I nearly did, 'no one wants you here', 'Stacey could have been really hurt you slag.' there it is again calling ME a slag! If only they knew the full story, Stacey could have been really hurt, well I'd always hoped she would have been really hurt. She definitely deserved it.

As much as I try and say the bullying didn't hurt, it still did. The tears were forming and I couldn't stop them because it hurt so much! It made me feel like shit, is this really how people feel about me? Is there any point in this at all? I'm going to get better and stronger but then as soon as I go back people are just going to tear me down. And if I'm pregnant it's going to be a whole lot worse, I can't tell them about the rape! That's just embarrassing. I don't want anyone to know.

"What's up?" Rosie asked.

"Nothing I'm fine."

"Yeah because when a girl cries she's fine."

"It's nothing important."

"Sel babe, tell me."

"Just some prats writing shit about me on Facebook."

"Oh. What are they saying?"

"I don't wanna talk about it. I've de-activated my account now anyways."

"Well just ignore them. You're an amazing girl."

"Thanks." I smiled.

"So what happened to us?"

"What do you mean?"

"You seemed to be into me but now just like that you're not."

"I have a girlfriend."

"What the fuck were you doing with me then?" She exploded.

"I just didn't know what was happening, so much has been going on lately that I thought she'd be better off without me."

"Yeah your a suicidal freak. You're only in here because you decided to slice up your arm, some of us have real problems."

"That was low."

I was crying now, to think I thought Rosie was a decent person.

"It's the truth."

"No. It's really not. So how about you shut the fuck up. I'm in here for more than one reason."

"Oh yeah. You force yourself to be sick as well don't you, fat bitch."

I don't know why she's being so vile but I don't think I can handle it.

"No I was raped you fucking twat!"

That seemed to shut her up.

"Rosie. Get to your room right now." Lisa yelled. I don't know how long she'd been standing there but I think she heard everything that was said.

Rosie took one last glance at me and then stormed out.

"Are you okay sweetie?"

"Yeah I'm fine Lisa. Can we just go get some food?"

"Okay then."

I'm not fine, that was a lie. What Rosie said wasn't true but it still stung.

I decided to eat a cheese sandwich with coke, I went back to sitting on my own because there wasn't anyone else that I wanted to sit by.

It took me half an hour to eat and it was now half twelve. Dr Abbotts agreed to extend my appointment to an extra half an hour so it was now time to go to his office.

I walked right in and took my usual seat.

"Okay well lets get down to business."

"Yeah." I sighed.

"Okay so, the first time you cut what did you feel?"

"I felt relief, it gave me control of all the pain. Sometimes it's just so hard when people hurt you because you can't change it but if you're hurting yourself then you're in control. So that's what I felt power, relief and pain."

"So that's why you did it because you were raped and Demi had fallen out with you."

"Yeah."

"When you were raped what did it make you feel?"

"It made me feel dirty and trampy. I also felt to blame, if I hadn't have fallen for all their tricks then they'd have never had anything against me. If I'd never gone to that toilet then they could never have done it."

"They would have found a way to do it anyway though, wouldn't they?"

"Probably they're very sneaky."

"So how did it escalade? How did you end up here?"

"I was at school and Demi spoke to me about some complaints that were made. Stacey and Miley told my head teacher that I'd been bullying them, making their lives hell. That's what they've been doing to me, I never once bullied them. Then Steven and Cameron joined in apparently I've been sexually harassing them. I mean what bullshit? Cameron raped for fucks sake. Anyway that got me detention and then I saw Stacey and Miley. They decided to rub it in, call me a slag brag about the detention I got and I lost it. I full on attacked Stacey because she'd pushed me too far and it was too much to handle. That got me suspended and then I passed out from drinking too much booze."

"Whenever you've hurt yourself it's been because of actions that they've caused hasn't it?"

"Always."

"So we just have to heal you. Get self harming out of your head and then teach you how to ignore it. After that you'll be fine."

"It's really that simple."

"What I have to do is. The time it's going to take not so much. It's going to be horrible and hard to give in to the habit. It's going to take a lot of your effort and time. But we'll do it eventually."

"Okay then. I'm so glad that I'm going to get better."

"So am I."

"That's it for this session. Take this elastic band and make sure that you use that for next time you get mad. Don't lash out or yell just slip that on your wrist and ping yourself. It really works. Tomorrow I'll talk you through some more coping mechanisms and before long you'll be fine." He smiled.

I slipped the elastic band onto my arm and left his room. I couldn't wait to see Demi.

"Selena!"

She ran up to me as soon as I walked in and spun me around in her arms.

"Hey Dems."

I pecked her beautiful lips and then sat down on her lap.

"How are you today?"

"I'm good. I actually feel like I'm getting better today."

"That's amazing beaut."

"So how was your day?"

"Work was stressful and I had to hand out a lot of punishments today."

"Why what's happened?"

"I don't want to upset you."

"You won't. Is it what they've been saying about me?" I asked.

"How did you know?"

"Facebook."

"Sel, don't listen to all that crap."

"I'm not. I de-activated it. I'm not going to let them bring me down."

"Good. And hey I was thinking after everything you've been through lately you really deserve a break. So how about on the 22nd of October you, me and Max go on holiday for a week?" She suggested.

"But how can we even afford that?"

"I have some money saved so I've got it covered."

"No I can't let you do that."

"I'm treating my special girl and my special boy wether you like it or not. It's happening. I'll book it when I get home."

"Oh my god! I love you so much."

"I love you too."

Our lips fused together in a loved up embrace. Demi stood, me still in her arms, and carried me bridal style over to Max.

"Hey Maxy, what you playing?" She asked.

"Cars."

"Can we play too?"

"Yeah."

She sat down beside the toys and pulled me onto her lap. We spent the rest of our visiting time playing with Max until I had to go eat. Chicken nuggets once again. That's all I ate for tea here, then I went straight to bed. The tv room is so over rated.

**Reviews?;)**


	24. I haven't seen you in so long

**Wednesday - Demi's POV**

So I have some money saved away in a bank account that my family gave me when I finished high school. That was EIGHT years ago, man time has gone fast! Anyway I'm going to use that money to pay for a holiday with Selena and Max. It's going to be so fun and it will give us a chance to get away. It will only be for a week though. We'll go on the 22nd of October the day after we break up from school and then come back on then 29th two days before we go back. I can't wait.

It's Wednesday today which means work. Not good. I went yesterday but the kids were just pissing me off beyond words. Speaking shit about Selena, they're asking for a slap.

I got up out of bed and headed to Max's room, he needs to get dressed and head downstairs.

"Max dude, I need to have a shower so do you think you can do your breakfast?"

"Yeah! I'm a big boy."

"Okay then. I'm in the shower if you need any help."

He ran off and I went back to Sel's room to get my towels. I needed a refreshing shower right about now because I'm getting very stressed. It was a warm yet cool water flow and it really calmed me down. I've been worrying about a lot lately but I haven't shown it because I know she has it ten times worse. My parents have been sending me loads of texts lately. I don't even know how they got my number but I wasn't happy. I haven't seen them since I was about seventeen, that was seven years ago. When I got out of rehab, yeah I was in rehab just like Selena.

That is why it hurt me so much to see Selena in the state that she was in. I'm bi-polar, she doesn't know that, nobody knows. When I was like five and still a little kid i'd be depressed and I'd feel fat, so I started to not eat. And then when I was eleven I cut myself for the first time. I was in such a bad way and I'd taken drugs, I was smoking and I'd slept with numerous guys. When I was seventeen I got pregnant and all the drinking and the coke killed the baby. I felt like shit and it was a wake up call, I entered myself into rehab and I haven't seen my parents since. I want back to school when I was out and by nineteen I was ready to go to uni. I spent four years there and got all my qualifications as a teacher. For a year I was down in Birmingham working as a sub at this school to get the feel of teaching and then I landed this job and I met Selena.

The only reason I hated my parents was because they didn't help. They could tell that there was something wrong, they found the condoms in my room and they found the drugs. They saw the conversation between me and my dealer about me putting out instead of paying. They knew how bad it was but they just didn't care. I needed them truth be told but they were more interested in there work. They could have stopped it getting so far if they had just tried but they didn't and the last conversation I had with them is what drove me away.

**_Flashback_**

**_"Demi it's tea!" My mom yelled._**

**_I'd not long got back from the hospital where I found out that my baby was dead. I was heartbroken, what had I done? I was so selfish and it had cost my baby it's life. _**

**_I got up off of my bed and headed downstairs. I took a seat at the table opposite my mom. My father and my little sister Madison were sitting either side of me._**

**_"I'm not feeling that hungry." I told them._**

**_"Why are you too high off of those drugs?" My dad sneered._**

**_"No I haven't had any today."_**

**_"Well that's a shock." My mom joined._**

**_"I just lost my baby." I let out._**

**_"You were pregnant?" He exploded._**

**_"Yes." I whispered._**

**_"You slag! You've done nothing but disappoint us all your life."_**

**_"I don't mean too. It's like I can't control it!"_**

**_"Bullshit. I'm done with you Demi. You're a failure and you'll never be anything. Get out!" My mother yelled._**

**_"Mom!"_**

**_"Now." _**

**_I took one look at Madison and I could tell she was upset as tears were streaming down her face. I was supposed to be someone she could look up to and ask for advice. I need to sort myself out._**

**_End flashback._**

And that's when I decided that I'd go to rehab. When I saw what a mess i'd become, I grabbed all my stuff and I just left. I found the nearest rehabilitation centre and hopped on a bus. I wanted to be someone better for Madison and I wanted to prove my parents wrong. She'd be 14 now, my baby sister. She's either in year 9 or year 10. She was only seven then and I miss her more than words can say.

I didn't even know I had bi-polar back then. I found out in rehab and that explained everything. All my emotions were heightened and everything was made ten times worse but I'm better now. I don't struggle with self-harm and I don't have an eating disorder. Though when my parents texted me asking if they could see me three days ago it brought it all back.

I stepped out of the shower with the towel wrapped tightly around my body. I just had to get dressed now and then I could go down and have my breakfast.

Max is only four, yet he seems to have grown up so much since I met him, to me he's such a big boy. He'd made his cereal all by himself and he'd eaten it. Now he was watching fireman Sam on the telly.

"Okay bud, go brush your teeth and I'll get your bag ready."

"Okay Demi."

I wasn't having breakfast today as I wasn't hungry so id already brushed mine. I made our lunches as quickly as possible and fixed both bags. Just as I was finished Max ran down. I locked the door and we started our journey to his school.

"Okay I'm going to fetch you at half two again, okay?"

"Alright."

"Be a good boy today."

"I will Demi."

"I love you."

"Love you too."

I pecked the top of his head and watched him as he walked through the door. It took me five minutes to get to school and I was sitting at my all to familiar desk.

"How's Sel?" Taylor asked.

"She's doing okay and we're okay. So it's all good."

"I'm glad."

"Yeah so when she gets out she wants to know if you can come and sleepover?"

"Sure. Of course i'd love to." Taylor beamed.

"Good. So you gonna come and visit her? I'll take you?" I asked.

"Maybe tomorrow."

"Okay. And remember ignore all the shit they're saying about Selena. They're just pathetic."

"I will do."

The whole morning went by so slow. I teach maths and just maths, even though I love the subject it still gets boring if I do it too much. It's horrible without Selena being here as well, I miss her and it feels so weird. These kids are being right twats as well, speaking shit about Sel, it's pissing me off. They've wrote loads of stuff on her desk: 'Filthy Dyke' 'Whore' 'Dead meat.' I tried to find out who it was but it was near impossible. When she comes back it's going to be hell for her. I've already nearly got in trouble for having a go at Stacey, Miley and Cameron. I don't teach Steven so I couldn't say anything to him but the other three boy am I going to make them pay. They've already had four detentions and have been sent to Mr Lakes office like five times.

By the time lunch had come I was exhausted. I relaxed in my chair and pulled out my lunch when I got a text.

**Unknown: Is this Demi?**

**D: Yeah. Who's this?**

**Unknown: it's Madison.**

**D: OMG. Maddy, I haven't seen you in so long.**

**M: I know. I miss you Dems.**

**D: I miss you too.**

**M: I wanna see you and so do mom and dad. They'd regret kicking you out and we want to be a family again. **

**D: I think it's too late for that.**

**M: Please for me! I want it to go back to the way it was.**

**D: Sweetie, it was never good**

**M: Yeah but please.**

**D: Fine maybe we can meet tomorrow but I'll have to talk to someone about that.**

**M: Okay. So what are you doing now?**

**D: Right this minute. I'm on lunch break so I'm just relaxing.**

**M: Where do you work?**

**D: Sandy High. In Sutton, do you know where that is?**

**M: I think so. I know where Sutton is but I don't know what Sandy High is**

**D: It's a school**

**M: You work in a school?:O**

**D: Yeah I'm a teacher. After I was kicked out I went to rehab and then back to school, then uni and I got my qualifications.**

**M: You proved them wrong, hey:) you're not a failure. I never thought you were though. I promise.**

**D: Thanks. I'm sorry that I was never the best sister, you never had anyone to look up to and I apologise**

**M: It's okay. I just need you back in my life**

**D: I'll try my best. But you have school don't you? I can only really do the day time tomorrow because I'm jam packed at night**

**M: I'll just come out of school at like lunch time and then go back. Mom and Dad will let me cause they really wanna fix this**

**D: Really?**

**M: Yes. They seriously miss you. **

**D: Oh, well I have to go now but I'll text you in a bit. I love you x**

**M: I love you too x**

I can't say no to Maddy so I'll have to make it happen. I also need to sort something out because I don't want to risk anything at the moment. I need to be there for Selena and if we get caught thats not going to happen. I've been thinking about it for a long time and it's actually illegal for Selena to be looking after Max. She's sixteen so she can live on her own legally but not with a minor. So if I temporarily adopt Max then I have a reason to be staying there and Selena can stay with us. No one would suspect a thing.

It was now two o'clock and I needed to visit Mr Lake. I called to the office and got a sub sent down to cover my class. I knocked on his door and waited to be called in.

"Ah, Miss Lovato what can I do for you?" He asked.

I took a seat in front of his desk and inhaled deeply.

"I need tomorrow off."

"But you were off Monday as well."

"I know, this time it has something to do with Selena Gomez."

"She's suspended isn't she?"

"Well yea but the school never knew the full extent you see. She has been suffering a lot lately and something happened here that she won't tell me or anyone. That's why she lashed out and that's why this all happened. She's in rehab right now trying to battle her self-harm addiction. Her parents have left her and her older brother so she was all alone in her house with just Max. Her four year old brother. Max has now got no one to look after him, care is not an option so I am looking after him in their house at the moment. I need the day off tomorrow so I can go to the adoption services and I'm going to temporarily adopt him, then when Selena is out she will come back and she'll live with us. Her and Max are my number one priority and she's going to need observing when she is out so that she doesn't relapse." I explained.

"Wow. That's a lot to take in. When do you think she'll be back at school?"

"She's scheduled to leave on the 5th of October and so she'll probably be back on the 7th."

"I actually feel really bad right now because I exploded at her and I didn't even hear the full extent of her side. Is self-harming the only reason she's in there?"

"No. Something else happened. I think she was raped but she won't open up to me only her psychiatrist. Which is good really because that means she's going to get better."

"May I just ask why you're so involved."

"Well yes, you know what I'm like sir. I like to get involved and help people. I could tell that she was a good child and just misunderstood. So I started the mentor scheme and then she opened up to me. She spoke to me about all the bullying from Stacey and Miley and I caught her giving Steven a blowjob, excuse my language, and that was for drugs that have been sold. She has gone through so much right now and after the whole suspended thing I went round to her house to talk to her. Then I found her passed out on her sofa and she'd drank so much so I took her to the rehab centre. Basically I just carried on being her mentor, I was only interested in her well being."

"I see well we need to get to the bottom of this eventually but right now I'm glad she has you and I'd like it if you were to carry on looking after her. Is that why you've been leaving at twenty past two instead?"

"Yes. I have to fetch her little brother and then go see her. Visiting hour is at three and it can't be changed."

"Okay well that's fine and you can have the day off tomorrow."

"Thank you sir. I'll see you Friday."

"Goodbye."

It was about quarter to three when I finally got out of the school so I was running late.

"I'm so sorry that I'm late." I told the office staff.

"It's absolutely fine. We'll just get Max brought down."

"Thank you and I'm afraid he won't be in school tomorrow."

"Can i ask why?"

"Well its a very long story and I'm in a rush so could I phone in tonight please?"

"Yea that's fine."

Max had now appeared and we both dashed for the door.

"Quick Maxy we're running late!"

We ran to the car and then I got there as fast as I could.

"I'm sorry that we're so late Sel."

"It's okay babe."

I slowly and softly pecked her lips and then straddled her lap. Normally she's the one straddling me but I wanted to switch it round.

"How was your day?" I asked.

"It was good. I've been very anti-social but I spoke to Dr Abbotts. He says I'm making great progress."

"That's amazing! Why are you being so anti social though?"

"I just don't like these people if I'm honest."

"Alright. Well I have to ask you something."

"Okay..."

"If anyone sees me in your house and with Max or something then it may be weird so I was thinking, I could temporarily adopt Max. That way no one would be suspicious and then when you're out you could live with us and no one would even suspect a thing."

"That would be amazing. You should do it."

"Good because I love being with you and I don't want anyone or anything to screw it up."

"Okay." She smiled.

We spent the rest of the time speaking to Max and then we all went our separate ways for the night.

**Review?:)**


	25. I really don't know my own girlfriend

**Thursday - Demi's POV **

Can you adopt a child just like that? I don't know. I guess I'll just take Max down there and we'll see. It's ten O'clock now and we have to leave at eleven and then I'm meeting my mom, dad and Madison for lunch at one.

"Max little dude how long have you been up?"

It seems like he always wakes up before me! Like does he have a mental alarm clock or something?

"Just about an hour. Don't I have school?"

Crap. Did I not tell him?

"No. We're going out today so I got you the day off school.

"Oh cool!"

"So cool. Anyway little man, me and your sister shouldn't really be together. We love each other and we love being together but we shouldn't. If people knew then I could get it serious trouble and we don't want that do we?" I asked.

"No. I love it with just the three of us and I can't wait till Lena comes back."

"I know you can't sweetie. But if I get caught then I'll never see you again so we've come up with a plan. I'm going to temporarily adopt you and then when Lena is done she can come and live with us. No one will suspect a thing and then we won't get caught."

"Will you adopting me change anything?"

"Nothing at all bud. You'll still live in this house with me and Lena. We'll still be a family and there will be no chance of us getting caught."

"I want to do that then." He smiled.

"Good. Come here."

He jumped into my arms and I pulled him close. I know that I haven't known him long really, just like I haven't known Selena that much but it feels like we have. It seems like I've known them forever, it's all gone so fast and I'm so happy that I met them both.

"We need to go eat now okay?"

"Okay Dems."

I placed him on the floor and took a hold of his hand. I'd just do us cocopops today because we were running a bit late as it was.

We'd eaten our food in less than five minutes, yes we're both pigs, and then I was running him upstairs to get dressed. I picked him a cute blue checked shirt with a hood, faded blue ripped jeans and some black hightops. He looked so adorable, he's definitely going to be a heartbreaker when he's older. Then I went to my room to sort out my clothes. As I was rummaging through the drawers I glanced down at my arm. It was surprising how no one had asked me why I had two tattoo's, one on each wrist, saying 'stay strong.' Maybe they don't know that there's a reason behind it? I'm not sure. But either way these tattoos mean a lot to me.

**_Flashback _**

**_I think I'm a lesbian and I'm scared. My parents are already so sick of me so maybe it would be better if I just went away. If they find out that I'm gay then maybe they'll disown me, I don't want that to happen. I don't like them much at the moment but I want them to love me still. I don't think they do though, no one does. I'm Demi, the fucked up psycho. I attention seek, I fuck countless boys, I take drugs, I smoke and I make myself sick and sometimes I just don't eat. Who would want me? No one, that's who. I'm 14 and I'm a complete slag. I think it would be better if I just went. _**

**_I picked up the knife hidden underneath my mattress and flicked it against my skin. My parents know that I self harm, they've seen the marks but they never said anything. So if I were to just die, they probably wouldn't say anything. I don't think I want to die really, when I cut I don't want to kill myself I just want to release the hurt. But if I die now I know that I won't care._**

**_That's the thought that sent me over the edge 'I wouldn't care'. I pressed deeper and deeper right into the veins and sliced through my entire wrist. I saw the blood collecting onto the floor and there was A LOT. The last thing I remember was Madison walking in and screaming. That is something a four year old should never see._**

No one spoke of it again. I was taken to hospital but my parents never mentioned it. The act that I attempted though was always on my mind. It had scared really badly and so I couldn't help but remember. As soon as I got out of rehab I was eighteen so I could legally get a tattoo. That's the first thing I did, 'Stay Strong' was my personal message to ensure that I never relapsed and also it covered the scars so other people couldn't see my past.

I picked out a pink strapped top and wore white short shorts to go with it. The weather outside was roasting and so I didn't want to burn. I straightened my hair and then went to grab Max. It was already ten past eleven so we were late.

**Adoption office**

"Hello, how may I be of service to you today?"

"I would like to find out how I can legally adopt Maxwell Gomez."

"Is this Maxwell?"

She pointed to Max who was shying away and clutching onto my hand.

"Yes it is."

"Well if I just take him away now and he can play so I can just talk to you."

"Yeah okay," I turned to Max, "Don't worry I'll be with you soon enough bud."

"Okay Dems."

I gave him a quick hug and then watched the woman lead him away.

"Okay so may I ask who's child is Max?" She asked me curiously.

"Well I'm a maths teacher at Sandy High. I have a student called Selena Gomez. Max is her little brother. I'm Selena's mentor and I'm the one who's making sure she gets back on track. She has a few problems and is currently in a rehabilitation centre." I said.

"May I ask how old Selena is?"

"She's sixteen."

"I see and where are her parents?"

"They abandoned her and left her with Max. When I became aware of her problems I took her to rehab and I've now been looking after Max on a daily basis. He's familiar with me and we get along, so I've been staying at there house. I've kept him fed and entertained and if I'm honest we've gotten quite close. Also when Selena gets out she's going to need someone around her so that she doesn't relapse."

"I understand that and the situation. Do you not think that they would be better in the care system?"

"No I honestly don't. Max has never really been shown much love except from Selena and so if they were to be split up or given away then his confidence is going to be completely ruined. He's happy now and he likes the way it is. As for Selena, after everything she's going through she's going to need someone that she's familiar with and trusts to help her through this. I'm financially stable to look after them both and I want to."

"Why are you not adopting Selena as well then?"

"Because Selena is sixteen and therefore she's at the legal age where she can live alone. So I don't want to make her feel like I'm babying her or treating her like a child. I just don't want anything else to happen to her because she's such a smart girl and she has so much potential."

"Well we need to discuss this all with Max just to double check and if that's all okay, we'll just need to do a house check and also a 'day in the life of' which is where someone will watch how an average day would work. If that is all fine then we'll do the paperwork and it will be finalized." She told me.

"That's great."

"You wait here and I'll go talk to Max.'

**Max's POV**

I was sitting playing with some cars when the lady from before walked in.

"Hello Max."

"Hello."

"I just have to ask you a few questions."

I wonder what this is about?

"Okay."

"First of all, what's Demi like?"

"She's awesome. She likes to play cars with me and she builded me some toys in the garden. I miss Lena but Demi is looking after me and makes sure that I'm happy. I love it with Dems and Sel around, Lena's my sister and Dems is more like my mom."

Member what Demi said? No one can know they're together and I can't let this girl know.

"How do the two of them act together?"

"Mostedly Demi is there to stop Lena crying. When Lena is upset then Dems will makes sure that she's okay. She also helps her with her homework a lot. But that's all."

"Any inappropriate touching?"

"What does inappropwiate mean?"

"Things like kissing or touching in places that aren't supposed to be touched?"

The truth is yes but I can't tell her that.

"No. One time Demi hugged Selena because Lena was shaking really bad and cwying. I don't know why but Dems was calming her down."

"Where did Demi sleep when she was looking after you?"

"She always slept in the gesst bedroom."

"That's all we need to know. Demi will be with you in a second."

**Demi's POV**

I was really worried. What if Max lets something slip by mistake.

"Everything is going very smoothly so far. So we'll be in touch and the house meeting will probably be on this up and coming Saturday. You can stay at their house at the moment and act as normal."

"Okay then thank you."

I got up and shaked her hand and then went to get Max.

**In the car**

"We're just going for a meal now bud."

"For lunch?" He asked.

"Yeah. We're meeting my mom, dad and little sister. Is that alright?"

"Yes that's fine."

"Okay then."

It was only a half an hour drive as we decided that we'd eat at a restaurant closer to Madison's school. I was so nervous by the time we arrived. I didn't know what they'd say or think about me and it was scary.

"Oh my god Demi! You've changed so much." Squealed Madison.

She ran up to me and literally squashed me. Her hug was so tight and I couldn't stop the tears.

"I missed you so much!" I cried.

"I missed you too."

I grabbed her hand and she led me over to the table.

"Who's this little fella?" My mother asked.

"It's a long and complicated story but I'm looking after him at the moment."

"Oh okay well just take a seat." She smiled.

I picked Max up and placed him carefully in a seat which was directly beside the one I was going to sit in.

"Demetria you're so grown up." My dad gushed.

"Twenty four now dad."

I was crying freely now and I couldn't stop.

"I missed my little girl."

"I missed you too dad and you mom. I've missed you all, I'm so sorry that I disappointed you all."

"You didn't, not really. It was a shock and we didn't really want you to go. We regretted everything that we said."

I picked a toy car out of my hand and handed it to Max to play with.

"Thank you Dems."

I smiled at him and then glanced back to my parents.

"I'm so happy that you got in contact. To start with I wasn't, I didn't want anything to do with you but I missed having a family and I missed you."

"Can we asked what happened. After you left home, where did you go?" My mom asked.

She was crying too and Madison was, even my dad was welling up.

"It had all gotten out of control. I'd messed up so bad and I really regretted it. So I went to rehab, I checked myself in and I was there for about five months. My problems had been going on for so long and they were so extreme that they took that long to solve. While I was in there I found out that I had manic bi-polar. Which meant that my moods spiraled out of control, my feelings are heightened and everything was made ten times worse. Without proper medication it was made more serious."

"That explains a lot. This is our fault we should have got you help when you first needed it."

"I'm not going to lie but that's true. You should have, let's not hash up the past though."

"Okay." my dad agreed.

"So what did you do when you were out?" Madison asked.

"I went back to school and by the time I was nineteen I was in uni. I stayed there for four years and got all my qualifications. At twenty three I took a temporary job down in Birmingham to get used to teaching and now I'm a permanent maths teacher at Sandy High in Sutton."

"I'm so proud of you. You honestly have no idea at all!" They all gushed.

I was feeling so complete right now. All I'd ever wanted was to be loved and respected by them and now that's happening.

"There's one more thing I have to tell you though. I'm really sorry and I think it may ruin your whole proud thing."

"What did you do?" He asked.

"It's not what I did. It's what I am. Mom, dad and Maddy... I'm a...a...well I..."

"You can tell us.

"I'm a lesbian." I rushed.

"Honey why would that make us any less proud?" My mom asked.

"Wait. You don't care?"

"Of course not. That's one more thing we have in common." Madison announced.

"Wait. What?!"

"Madison is a bisexual and we don't care at all. We're not as small minded as to think that you have a say in any of this. It's natural to you and I'm okay with that." My dad said, "Now why don't you tell us the story of this little guy?"

He ruffled Max's hair and Max started to giggle.

"This is Max. He's my students little brother and I'm going to be temporarily adopting him. I'll look after him and his sister and I'm living with them."

"Why?" My mom was puzzled.

"Well Selena is sixteen and she reminds me so much of myself. She's in rehab right now and she's going to be fine but as soon as she's out I won't leave her side. I'm her mentor at school and I'm going to make sure she gets back on track."

"That's so sweet. Is she hot?" Maddy joked.

I expected my parents to scold her but they just laughed along.

"She is something."

"You don't have a crush on your student do you Demi?!" My mother scolded.

"No of course not but I'd be lying if I said your sister wasn't pretty wouldn't I Maxy?"

"My sisters butiful." He agreed.

I looked down at my watch and noticed that it was half two. Shit we have to go.

"Speaking of Selena, me and Max have to go visit her now. This lunch was amazing."

I went around the table and hugged my three family members individually.

"I'll text you to set something up again?" I told them.

"Definitely."

I picked Max up and ran with him to the car. It was a longer drive from here and I didn't want to be late for Sel.

**Rehab - Selena's POV**

Demi had arrived half an hour before and we were just lounging around on the sofa that they'd had put in there today. I always loved visiting times, they made it normal again, it was as if I wasn't even in treatment.

"So what did you do today?" I wondered.

"Went to see the adoption agency at social services and then had a meal with my parents and my little sister."

"Your parents? You haven't mentioned them before and I didn't know you had a sister."

Wow. I really don't know my own girlfriend.

"I wasn't exactly in touch with them but they seem intent to meet up so I thought why not?"

"Did you have a nice time?"

"Yeah it was amazing."

"Was Max there?"

"Where else would he be Sel?" She teased.

"Like I meant what did he do?"

"He just sat there and played with a toy."

"And what about the whole adoption thing?"

"That's gonna be fine. They just have to come round, do a few tests and observe a few things."

"Then we're good to go?"

"Yeah."

I couldn't wait to go back to living with the two most precious people in my world.

"So how was your day?"

I described my entire day but made sure to keep the whole pregnancy test quiet. I didn't want her to know that I'd done it let alone what the result was.

**Reviews?;)**


	26. Skyscraper

**Friday – Selena's POV**

I'm sixteen years old and I'm pregnant! How did life get this fucked up? I used to be a happy teenage girl that had everything she could ever want, apart from loving parents. I was popular, I had friends and Stacey wasn't out to get me. Now I'm in rehab, I was raped, I have no parents and school is going to be horrible. At least now I'm going to try that bit harder to recover. I can't harm a baby, no way! I have to keep myself healthy so that the baby is safe.

My normal morning routine began and I felt the horrible unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach. The bathroom had been unlocked so I no longer had to settle for the bin. I was trusted to not force myself and that was actually a relief. I mean if they believed in me then I should believe in myself.

I always had hated being sick. It gave me such a disgusting feeling but at least this time it was for a good cause. My beautiful baby was worth it. I was worried a lot more now though. What if Demi doesn't want to be with me because of the baby? What if I get it taken off of me? One things for sure everyone at school is going to have a field day when they find out.

"Selena sweetie, how are you feeling today?" Lisa asked.

Me and Dr Abbots told him about my current situation yesterday. She is my carer so she does deserve to know and I could do with some female help.

"I've just been sick but other than that I'm actually good."

I was honestly feeling very happy. Even though this baby was a rape child, I was still going to love him/her more than anything in the world. I was sort of looking forward to having someone who would love me unconditionally. Yeah I had Demi and Max but this was just for me.

"That's great. Breakfast is ready now."

I followed her down the corridor and straight over to the food table. I was so hungry I could eat a horse. Not literally, mind you. There were pain au chocolat's which I absolutely adore so obviously I chose two of them. Then I had a glass of warm milk to go with it. I plonked myself down on the seats and began to feast.

"Hey Sel. Can I talk to you?" Rosie asked.

I completely blanked her and carried on eating. I had no business speaking to her.

"Please. I'm really sorry."

Just more silence.

"I am, I swear."

"Just piss off." I spat.

I wasn't interested in her apologies or excuses.

"I really liked you and when you turned me down it really got to me." She confessed.

"Yeah well I was going through a lot and I thought being with you would help but that was a mistake."

"Ouch, that stung. Obviously I was just someone that you used. Everyone in here is going through a lot."

"Yeah but I'm only focused on me and my recovery, no one else's. And yeah, I sort of used you, but that gave you no excuse what-so-ever to say what you did." I argued.

"You're right and I honestly am sorry. Can't we just be friends?"

"No. I don't want friends right now and I can't forgive you for what you did."

I actually liked Rosie and it really hurt to see the tears in her eyes, I watched as she walked away and I sort of regretted it. But Demi would freak if she knew I was talking to her. I'm not risking anything. Not even my pregnancy, she can't know.

"Can I go for a wash now Lisa?"

"Course you can, come one."

I loved having a shower; it was a time when I could just stand under the warm, soothing water and just think. For a while that changed, it became a place where I could give myself revenge and injury, but now I had the pleasure back.

I placed my hand on my tummy and just rubbed, I was only like two weeks gone so there wasn't much formed, but it was hard to believe there was anything growing inside. I kept thinking about how life would be in nine months. Would I still be at school? Would Demi have left me? Will I still have Max? I pictured me in the hospital, the baby just born, all my friends from school crowding round and gushing at the cuteness. Max one side of me, looking in awe at his beautiful baby niece or nephew and Demi the other side looking proud at her amazing girlfriend and her adorable daughter or son. When she eventually finds out I hope that she will treat it like it's hers but I don't know. That's how I want my life to be but I doubt that will happen.

It's time to go to the social room now and I really don't want to. I hate it in there, it's boring and I just want to stay in my room. Rosie is always around and I just don't want to see her if I'm honest. Carter, Mary and Cordelia don't even acknowledge me if I'm honest, they just all sit together on the sofa and chatter as if I'm not there. Maybe I would like it if I could at least talk to someone.

**Social room**

"Hey." I looked up and there was a girl looking down at me, I don't think I've ever seen her before so she must have been new.

"Umm, hey."

She took the seat beside me and it was sort of awkward.

"So I'm new, you don't mind me sitting here right?"

"Of course, I don't mind. I don't really have many friends if I'm honest so it's nice to have someone to talk to." I explained.

"My name's Harper. What's yours?"

"It's Selena. You seem really nervous."

"I sort of am. It's creepy here and I'm not used to it at all. I miss my parents and my friends."

"I get what you mean, it was really horrible when I first got here but the people are really nice and it's actually not that bad."

Harper was a small, petite girl with bright, flaming red hair. She was unbelievably pretty but had a really weird dress sense. I could see myself getting along with her and actually making a friend in here.

"I hope it warms on me too."

"It will." I smiled.

"So how old are you Lena? I can call you Lena right?"

"Yeah, my little brother calls me that and I miss it, so I'd like it. And I'm sixteen, you?"

"I'm only fourteen. I feel so young; I think I'm the youngest here."

"I think you are." I chuckled.

"Do you miss your family?"

"I don't really have any family to miss. I just live with my little brother and my teacher. My parents were both pricks, they left the house and never came back. So did my older brother."

"Oh that must be rough. Is it not awkward living with your teacher?"

Not at all.

"No, I can talk to her about everything, she has the best advice and she's always there for me. Besides it's like having your own personal tutor. She's amazing with Max too and he loves her."

I wanted to tell her that she's a great kisser, she makes me feel special, I love being close to her, She makes me laugh, she's absolutely beautiful, she can sing as well and that's something we can share, she's beyond smart and she's just perfect but obviously I didn't.

"That's awesome. Is she like really cool and lets you have boys round?"

"No, I'm a lesbian so that doesn't really bother me though."

"Oh thank god." She breathed.

Thank god?

"What do you mean?" I questioned.

"I'm a lesbian too but I didn't want to say anything 'cause I wanted to fit in and I didn't know if you would be funny."

"No of course not; you can be yourself around me." I assured.

She looked so sweet and innocent; I wondered what had gone wrong with her.

"I attempted suicide." She let out.

"Why?"

I didn't want to be rude and ask but I was curious, she seems so pure.

"Everyone found out that I'm gay and then I was really bullied. I used to go to Brickfield High but I have to move schools now. I don't know where I'm going to go."

Brickfield is on the other side of town.

"You should come to Sandy High and keep me company."

"Sandy High? I think that was one of the options."

It would be amazing if I could have one more friend at school.

"You should come! What year are you in?"

"Nine."

"I'm in eleven but it doesn't matter. We could hang at lunch and break; I'd look out for you, although there are some right twats there." I admitted.

"Maybe I will. I'd like it if we could become friends but I understand if you don't wanna 'cause I'm two years younger."

She's too insecure and I really hate that, us girls shouldn't be made to feel like that and I know that now.

"Age doesn't bother me at all. Of course we can be friends; you're the only decent person in here that has actually bothered with me."

"Selena, time to go to lunch!" Lisa shouted.

"Okay well I'll see you later Harper."

"Yeah, see ya."

**The cafeteria**

For lunch today I had a cheese and ham sandwich with ready salted crisps and a can of Fanta. It was actually really nice and I enjoyed it a lot.

"You have to forgive me Sel." Rosie complained as she sat down beside me.

"No I don't just go away."

"You're in the wrong here not me. You used me."

"Yeah I did, get over it and fuck off."

"You are such a bitch. I bet you deserved to be raped." She sneered.

Things like that made me question whether I should even bother trying. All it took was someone to make a snide comment like that and I was all set and ready to cut. It's how I had learnt to deal with things; if someone had upset me or I was mad I'd harm myself, simple as.

I viciously snapped the plastic band on my wrist repeatedly; it gave me some relief but not much. It barely worked. Why does she have to be so pathetic and vile? What did I even do to deserve this?!

I forced myself to finish the rest of the food, even though I wasn't in the mood at all, because I have to for the baby. If I don't eat then the baby is going to suffer and the poor thing doesn't deserve it.

**With Dr Abbots**

"How have you been feeling today Selena?"

This was the same question that he asked me every single time.

"I was okay but then Rosie decided to make a comment that really set me off."

"What did she say?"

"That I probably deserved to get raped."

"Well that's not true at all. No one deserves that and you need to get that into your head."

"I know it's just I can be perfectly fine but as soon as someone insults me then I just want to hurt myself."

"So basically, you never have the need to cut until someone makes you feel bad about yourself?"

"Yeah that's exactly what I mean."

"So we just have to teach you ways to cope with how other people treat you." He stated.

"Yep, then if I know how to do that, I can stop the whole self-harming."

"Exactly, so why does it upset you so much when they say these things?" He questioned.

"I guess it hurts because I start to believe it and then I feel worthless. I think that they're telling the truth so I punish myself."

"It's all to do with your confidence and your insecurities then really, isn't it?"

"Yeah I guess so."

We carried on talking like that for our entire session and I actually think it really helped. I started to understand how my mind actually works. I just have to learn to believe in myself a lot more and then I'll be fine.

**Visiting session**

I was snuggled on the sofa with Demi and Max was lying on me asleep. Apparently he didn't sleep very well the night before because he felt ill so he was completely worn out. We just had to keep our voices to a minimum.

"How was school?" I whispered.

"It was alright, people are still acting like absolute cunts but I'm getting better at handling them."

"It's 'cause they don't know the truth. To be fair if I saw someone randomly attack a girl I'd probably act the same. I blame Miley and Stacey mainly, they've got the whole school brainwashed. It's gonna be so hard when I go back but I'll manage and I'll have you. I'm feeling really positive and happy today, I feel like it's all going to be okay."

"I couldn't be happier that you feel like that. That's all I want for you. I have to tell you something though?"

"What is it?"

"You see these tattoos?" She held out her arms and I stared at the writing along her wrists, I swear I could see scars but I wasn't sure.

"Yeah?"

"I got these after I was out of rehab when I was eighteen. I got them to cover the scars I got from self-harming. I'm so similar to you it's unreal and I went through a lot of what you did. I got better though and I know that you can too. When I got out I wrote a song which really reflected how I felt and I'd like to sing it to you?"

"I'd love that."

I actually couldn't believe what she was telling me. All this time and I didn't know a thing. I get why she cared so much and why she understood, it was because she knew exactly how it felt.

**_"Skies are crying, I am watching,_**  
**_Catching tear drops in my hands,_**  
**_Only silence as it's ending,_**  
**_Like we never had a chance,_**  
**_Do you have to make me feel like,_**  
**_There's nothing left of me?_**

**_You can take everything I have,_**  
**_You can break everything I am,_**  
**_Like I'm made of glass,_**  
**_Like I'm made of paper,_**  
**_Go on and try to tear me down,_**  
**_I will be rising from the ground,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper._**

**_As the smoke clears, I awaken,_**  
**_And untangle you from me,_**  
**_Would it make you feel better,_**  
**_To watch me while I bleed?_**  
**_All my windows still are broken,_**  
**_But I'm standing on my feet._**

**_You can take everything I have,_**  
**_You can break everything I am,_**  
**_Like I'm made of glass,_**  
**_Like I'm made of paper,_**  
**_Go on and try to tear me down,_**  
**_I will be rising from the ground,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper._**

**_Go run, run, run,_**  
**_I'm gonna stay right here,_**  
**_Watch you disappear,_**  
**_Yeah, oh,_**  
**_Go run, run, run,_**  
**_Yeah, it's a long way down,_**  
**_But I am closer to the clouds up here._**

**_You can take everything I have,_**  
**_You can break everything I am,_**  
**_Like I'm made of glass,_**  
**_Like I'm made of paper,_**  
**_Oh Oh._**

**_Go on and try to tear me down,_**  
**_I will be rising from the ground,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper,_**  
**_Like a skyscraper."_**She sang.

That summed up exactly how I wanted to feel and do you now what? It actually helped and I know that whenever someone says something horrible to me that thinking back to this moment and this song will well and truly help me.

"I love you Demi."

"I love you too."

Then are lips met and we shared an embrace.

**Review?:')**


	27. Maxwell

**A/N I was going to update this sooner but I went on holiday Monday for four days and I didn't have any internet so here you go. This is also not as long as my usual chapters because I wanted to get it posted for you guys.**

**DEMI'S POV**

"The social are coming around today to check the house little man." I told Max as I walked into his room.

"Is this about the adoption?" He asked.

"Yes we have to clean the entire house."

He jumped up from under the covers and pulled me into a hug.

"We have to make everything clean then Dems." He squealed.

"Yes we do." I laughed.

I pulled away from his embrace and dragged him out of the room behind me so we were standing in the hallway.

"You clean up here and I'll do downstairs?"

"Alright." Max confirmed.

I ran off and left him, I'd probably have to re-do everything that he's done because it won't be clean enough but I want to make him feel like he's involved. The kitchen was a right tip; I haven't done any washing up for about a week and I haven't cleaned the sides at all. The floor wasn't much better; it was stained and wet. The lounge carpet had crisps all stepped into it and the TV was all dirty. Mud had been stepped all into the stairs and it was generally a disgrace. It took me an hour per room, the kitchen, lounge room and the hallway.

"Max! It's been three hours have you done it now?" I yelled.

"Yeah I just finished." He replied.

I ran up the stairs to go and check if it was acceptable and to be fair to him it was spotless. Like proper spotless. He'd done all the bedrooms, even the guests, and he'd cleaned the bathroom. The shower and the toilet were glistening white; I'm pretty sure you could use it as a mirror.

"Little man this is amazing."

"I'm such a good cleaner." He boasted.

"You really are." I praised.

It was still only eleven and they had agreed to stop off at twelve o'clock. With just one hour ready I decided to make me and Max look presentable. It has to look like I can manage his hygiene and that I can provide and care for him.

"Get changed so you're wearing your nicest clothes and I'll do the same." I told him whilst walking down the corridor to mine and Selena's room.

I put on a white blouse with matching black skinny jeans and slipped on my black flats. The outfit contrasted well together and gave me a sophisticated look. Max had put on his red, checked shirt and some blue jeans; he looked like a right cutie pie. I was just about to take him down for food when the doorbell rang. I expected it to be Taylor randomly popping round because that seemed to be the only solution but it was Miss Davis from the adoption agency. SHIT! She's early.

"Hello, come on in." I greeted stepping to the side so that she had room to enter.

"Good Morning Demi, good morning Max." She said sending us a sweet smile each.

"Good morning." I replied.

She never uttered another word as she began to walk around the house. I didn't really know what one did in that situation so I just followed her round like a lost puppy. She kept going into each room observing the surroundings and then scribbling down notes on her little clipboard. The whole inspection took around fifteen minutes to complete and once it was over we all took a seat on the sofa opposite the telly.

"You have a very fine home Miss Lovato." She praised.

"Thank you, we do try and keep it tidy."

I was really nervous! Mine and Selena's future was practically riding on this.

"I think it would be safe to leave Maxwell Gomez in your custody." I let out the breathe I'd been holding and literally jumped for joy.

Max was overjoyed by the news as well.

"We will make a surprise appearance sometime soon so that we can do a day in the life of but we won't tell you when it is." She told me.

That seemed like it was going to be tricky. We'd both have to be on our best behaviour 24/7.

**Not really feeling this anymore tbh. Review if you want me to carry on writing it. I will if I feel like people actually enjoy it. Need at least six reviews before the next chapter is posted. **


	28. Did you know she was pregnant?

**DEMI'S POV**

"Do you want to get something to eat buddy?" I asked.

"Yeah please." He smiled.

I made him a jam sandwich, which I know he loves, and then joined him at the table with my own cheese sandwich.

"Does this mean I get to stay with you and Lena?"

"It sure does." I beamed.

**SELENA'S POV**

"Hey Haper." I greeted as she sat beside me on the sofa.

"Hey Selena, how are you feeling today?"

"Very good actually. What about you?"

"I'm good too. Do you have a problem with that Rosie girl because she keeps giving me the dodgiest looks?"

"Uh yeah we don't get along. I sort of had this thing with her even though I'm dating another girl and so I practically used her and now she's mad. Then she basically told me that I deserved to be raped."

"That sounds like an absolute bitch and don't let her tell you stuff like that, it's not true at all." She assured.

"Thanks sweetie."

"So who's your girlfriend?"

"Her name's Demi. She's absolutely perfect and I love her so much. She makes me smile, she's beautiful, she's funny, she's adorable and oh my god she's just perfect."

"She sounds amazing."

"She is. Do you have a girlfriend?"

"I did but we were dating in secret and then when everyone else found out about us she panicked and broke my heart. She was something though."

I hate people like that; people that our too afraid of what people think that they don't do what they truly want.

"If she couldn't let everyone know about you too then I'm sure she wasn't worth it."

"But she was."

"No, she wasn't. You sound like ten times the person she is and you don't need someone who is afraid to be who they truly are."

"I guess you're right."

"I know I'm right."

I stayed like this for a while longer, just chatting to my new friend, and building her confidence. Harper is actually quite beautiful and she has a good personality, that other girl was absolutely stupid to let her go.

* * *

I'd had lunch and spoken to Dr Abbotts which really was helping me a lot and finally I got to have a conversation with Demi.

"Hey beautiful." I really missed my girlfriend even though I saw her yesterday so I couldn't help but embrace her. Our kiss lasted about two minutes and it was getting too heated for Max's eyes.

"Excuse me." He laughed.

I blushed a deep shade of red at Max's interruption and then took a seat on the sofa.

"I'm officially able to look after Max and it's legal." Yes! I was getting better and better news today and seriously I'm so happy.

"That's perfect." I screamed.

"I know."

I scooped Max up into my arms and literally dived onto Demi whilst she was sat on the sofa.

"We're all going to be a family! This couldn't get better."

Finally my life was becoming perfect.

* * *

I got out of treatment yesterday. I've been taught how to control how people's words affect me, how not to take it out on myself and how to handle food. I'm so much better now and way more positive. The social came round to the house like a week after they approved Demi and now we can all live together with no suspicions what so ever!

"Selena, are you coming down now!" Demi called.

"Yeah I'm just on my way."

Demi said she'd take Max to school today so I can catch up with Taylor, I haven't seen her in ages and I missed her. I am petrified about going to school though because I don't know what they're all going to say to me.

* * *

"I've missed you so much!" Taylor gushed.

"I missed you too."

Our conversation was broken up though when I felt something hard hit my back and man did it hurt. It was so sharp. I spun round on the spot and it was a fucking stone, I looked to see who had thrown it at me and it was this girl from our year.

"What the fuck are you doing back here? Thought you were visiting the loony bin." She jeered.

"Save your breath." I sighed.

"Don't tell me what to do."

I turned back round and carried on walking, grabbing Taylor's wrist so that she'd join me.

* * *

We were all sat in the hall waiting for our assembly. Every single person that I've seen so far has hurled abuse at me and made me feel shitty but surprisingly I didn't want to cut.

"Hello class. We will start the assembly soon but first student Miley Cyrus has a video to show us."

What? Please tell me this isn't what I think it is. But it was. I felt like throwing up as soon as my face showed up on the screen everyone booed but then soon shut up to hear what was going on. I glanced over at Demi and saw that she was confused. Stacey was accusing me of some shit about stealing Taylor.

"What is this?" Taylor hissed.

But I couldn't talk, I couldn't even answer. Everyone was intently staring at the bored and I couldn't move. Tears were flowing down my face as I watched me getting raped. They were no longer booing they had a look of pure guilt all over their faces and were looking disgustingly at Cameron, Stacey and Miley. SHIT! I suddenly remembered that Demi had come in and found me right at the end. I can't have anyone see that! I was about to protest when the video cut short. They'd all seen me get completely used and I was so embarrassed. I knew my happiness was too good to be true. The teachers had tried to turn it off but they couldn't and it was too late anyway, they'd seen.

"What the fuck Miley!" I suddenly yelled causing everyone to jump. I stood straight up in my seat and glared right in her direction.

"I couldn't handle it anymore, I couldn't live with what we'd done to you."

"Then why didn't you fucking tell someone instead of showing the whole school!" I screamed.

I was breaking down quickly and everyone was seeing me in my most vulnerable state.

"I'm sorry!"

"Sorry isn't good enough. You've completely ruined me and ruined my life! We used to be friends, I thought we had something. Why did you do this."

"I made a mistake."

"This was not a mistake!" I spat lunging at her, in seconds Taylor was pulling me back and soothing me in her arms.

"It's okay." She soothed.

"No! It's never going to be okay."

I pushed her away and ran as fast as I could straight out the doors. I can't deal with this anymore, everything just isn't worth it anymore. They all know what's happened and they all know it in detail. I feel sick to the stomach right now and I can't even be bothered to live. I locked myself in the cubicle and pulled out the knife from my bag. I didn't know it was in there to be honest but I'd obviously forgotten to take it out.

**DEMI'S POV**

What the fuck had I just witnessed?! That day Selena told me that they'd just upset her but she'd been god damned raped. I'm so fucking fuming right now and so close to chopping that twats dick off. My poor baby, all those bruises were from him! All her self harming and no eating was because of him. He caused all of this and caused all her pain. Selena just had a screaming match with Miley and then she just left. She's not in the right frame of mind and I don't trust what she would do. I ran right after her but she'd gone from the hall. I'm pretty sure I know what she's going to do and the thought makes me sick. Maybe she's gone to the toilet? I ran to the nearest toilet and the second I entered I knew it was where she went. My heart nearly stopped at the site, there was blood all on the floor leaking from the end cubicle. It was locked so I couldn't get in, I jumped right over the edge and literally broke down at the sight I saw. She was lying lifelessly on the floor with blood everywhere and a knife right beside her.

"SELENA!" I screamed.

I lifted her right off the floor and ran her straight out the room. That was probably a mistake as there were students crowding around out there. They all screamed when they saw her and all the blood. I'm pretty sure that they must have all felt like absolute crap because they'd made her life hell.

* * *

I'd been in the hospital waiting room for ages when suddenly a doctor came out.

"Selena Gomez?"

I jumped right up, "I'm her guardian at the moment."

He looked at me sympathetically, with my mascara stained face and tear soaked top I must have looked a right state but I just didn't care. I needed to know if my baby was alright.

"She's awake and she's stable. It was a momentary relapse so she probably won't have to go back to rehab but she should probably stay here for a few days so we can check up on her mental health."

"Thank god she's okay." I breathed.

"There's something else though."

"What?" I asked.

"Did you know that Selena was pregnant?"

**10 reviews till next update. Thanks for reading please answer the questions.**

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**Thanks xox**


	29. I'm so sorry

**_Demi's POV_**

"She…what…huh?" I wasn't able to form full sentences. What this doctor was saying can't be true.

"Selena Gomez is pregnant and she has been for around four weeks."

"This can't be happening to her." I choked out.

"I'm very sorry but you can see her now." He said sympathetically and then he was gone, just like that.

I didn't want to waste my time fretting about what I just hear, I just needed to see my Lena.

"Baby are you okay?" I asked, the second I saw her secured to all the wires. I was at her bedside holding her hand in no time.

"I'm so sorry."

"It's okay and you're going to be okay. Stacey, Miley, Cameron and Steven are going to be gone soon and you'll never have to see them again."

"Where are they going?"

"Probably jail." I smiled. Those kids better hope I don't see them.

"Not Miley and Steven." She shouted.

"Yes. You saw what they did to you Lena."

"It wasn't them. Steven played a small part in it and did make me feel like shit but he shouldn't have to go to jail and Miley never wanted to do it in the first place. She's the only one who apologised and tried to help; her releasing the tape was just some twisted way of trying to set her and me free from their grip."

"They need to pay for what they did." I spat.

"And they will but prison is too much."

"Are you fucking mental? They have ruined your entire life and now you're pregnant at sixteen. Is this really what you wanted for your life? Aren't you made at them for what they did?! You should despise them and you should want for them to pay!" I yelled.

"I do want them to pay!" She screamed. "Stacey set this whole thing up so she can go to fucking hell! Cameron's the one that raped me and took advantage of me so he can fuck off as well. Those two fucking twats will pay; they can go to jail and I don't care what happens to them but not Steven and Miley. They need punishing but jail's too extreme. I handed myself to Steven on a platter and all he did was take my offer and then brag about it to Taylor. That's just a normal boy; it's twisted but not evil. Miley just went along with everything Stacey said so yeah she needs to pay but she didn't do that much."

"I can't even believe what I am hearing right now Selena. Every single thing that's happened to you recently was all caused because of them. Why did you cut? Because they made you feel that way."

"No actually I first cut because YOU left me when I needed you, I was at my lowest and all you cared about was whether I told you everything about my life. I didn't know how to tell you; I was scared of what you'd say and what you'd do. You just left me and that's what caused me to cut so should you go to jail? You treated me like shit and left me so does that mean you're to blame? I am stressing so much lately I'm pregnant, I have no parents and I'm stuck looking after Max but do you know what? I was fine with it because I had you. I'm only just recovering from a suicide attempt and yet you're putting all this stress and strain on me. I can't be dealing with this right now. I just need you to be with me and to help me."

"I better go and fetch Max." I whispered; leaving the hospital room and leaving the love of my life behind.

The truth is she's right; I feel partly to blame because I should have known that something was going on and also I can't bear to think about my Lena going through all that.

**Selena's POV**

I'm obviously just not meant to be happy. This morning was great; yeah people hated me and yelled abuse but I was healthy and happy. Then in a matter of minutes it was all gone and I was straight back to where I was before.

There was a knock at the door so I called whoever it was in. There stood Mr Lake, Miley and Steven.

"What do you want?" I questioned. I may not want them to be punished that severely but that doesn't mean I forgive them.

"These two people have something to say to you and then we need to discuss how this is going to plan out." Mr Lake told me.

"I woke up literally not one hour ago; can't you just give me a day?"

"This has to be done now." He stressed.

Miley and Steven approached me cautiously and stood one on each side of the bed whereas Mr Lake stayed by the door.

"I didn't know that those pictures were going to be taken Selena I just saw the chance to get pleasured and took it. When Stacey told me about it I thought that I'd play along with it; have some fun and piss you off. I didn't think it would get as serious as it did or lead you to do what you did. I was stupid and I didn't think at all. I'm so sorry for what I did and I swear that's the truth. I'll take whatever punishment comes my way." Call me stupid but I think he's sincere.

"Fine." I said and then he stepped back whilst Miley stepped forward.

"We used to best friends and that was never fake for me. What Stacey said was a load of bullshit. I was in love with you and I still am but I was crapping myself because I knew what that meant, I wasn't ready for people to judge me and give me grief so I just went along with Stacey. It got way too out of control and I panicked; I was too far in to back out so I was forced to carry on. I showed everyone that tape because I was sick of it; this time I knew that I couldn't be selfish. You needed to be set free and the abuse needed to end. I figured if everyone knew what you'd gone through and what your reasons were then they'd leave you alone. I'm sorry Lena, I'm so so sorry." She cried.

"I'm not going to say it's alright because trust me it's really not but maybe someday I can forgive you both but it's going to take time and you're going to have to work so hard at it."

"We will." They both let out in unison.

"Mr Lake what did you need to talk to me about?"

"You two can leave now; sit outside in the waiting room." He waited until they had left the room and then took a seat beside me. "What are you going to do with the two of them?"

"I guess they could be expelled for like two weeks for bullying and then that's it."

"I think you're being way too lenient. They could have cost you your life."

"That's what Demi said." Shit. I called her Demi.

"Demi?" Think of a lie. Think of a lie.

"Well she lives with me doesn't she? She's sort of my  
motherly figure, the only one I have actually, so I tend to call her Demi rather than Miss Lovato outside of school." Smooth.

"Yeah that makes sense and she is right." Good, he brought it.

"It wasn't really Steven and Miley; they just did what they thought they had to."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. So what's happening with Cameron and Stacey?" I asked.

"Cameron is definitely going to jail for rape as we have videoed evidence and he admitted it. Stacey will most likely end up going as well as she participated in it but you will have a restraining order against the both of them and they will of course be expelled."

"So I never have to see them ever again." I hoped.

"Just in court I'm afraid."

"Oh." I don't want to see them ever!

"But that's ages away so don't let yourself fret over it right now. Some other students have come to see you, can I send them in?"

"Yeah okay." I was puzzled to be honest. Doesn't everyone hate me?

"I'm so sorry Selena." It was the girl who had thrown the stone at me this morning.

"It's fine I guess."

"No it's not. I shouldn't have done that when I didn't know the real reason as to why you were acting that way and I really am sorry."

"Trust me it's all cool." I smiled.

She soon left the room and I was so glad when Taylor walked in.

"Tay." I squealed. She pulled me into her arms the second she saw me and we shared an embrace.

"I'm the worst best friend ever. I can't believe I didn't know what was going on! I'm so sorry, can you forgive me?"

"Of course I can babe."

"Thank god. I will make it up to you."

**Many visitors later**

"What the fuck are they doing here?" I looked up and it was Demi that had walked in next accompanied by Max. The second he saw me, my little bud was up on the bed with me in my arms.

"Who?"

"You know who. Miley and Steven."

"Just drop that now please."

"Selena why are they here?!"

"I need you to focus on me and our relationship right now; nothing else matters, they certainly don't. I want to cheer up and feel better so either drop the subject and come over here for a kiss or leave."

**Review? Six till I update;)**


	30. I'm not leaving you again

**_Demi's POV_**

"Baby I'm not leaving you again, I did it once before and I regret that more than anything in the world. I guess I just don't understand how you can be so forgiving." I sighed as I joined her and Max on the hospital bed.

"They completely fucked my life right up and I was going extremely rough for a while. You've seen my scars and you saw how it turned out but treatment really fixed me and now I have hope; I'm feeling better. This was just one relapse which I can fix; I'm trying to look at the bright side. Now everyone is going to stop bullying me, I won't get hassled for being pregnant because they know the full story, me and you can live together and no one will suspect anything and I'm in a better mind set. I don't want Miley and Steven going to jail for doing what they did because I can tell that they're sorry and they don't deserve it. They still get punished and they are going to pay for it but I can't ruin their lives. I need you to respect my decision and be there for me because without your support I'm going to really struggle." She explained. It did make sense and this is all about Selena right now, not me. We have to think about her and her baby.

I placed my hand beneath her chin and lifted her head to gaze in her eyes. Her lips were then gently placed on mine and the sparks coursed through me like fireworks.

"I love you so much and I respect everything that you have to say. What about the baby though, does that mean you're keeping it?" I checked.

"Yes, I couldn't get it aborted and there's no way I'm letting someone else raise my child."

"Raise _our _child." I smiled, taking her hand in mine.

"You mean that?"

"More than anything."

The kiss was more heated this time and filled with complete love and passion.

"I am with you for the long run and nothing is going to mess us up this time." I told her.

There was a knock at the door and in walked one of the many doctors that worked in the hospital, "I think I need to talk to you about your current situation." She said sympathetically.

"Yeah I guess we do." Selena agreed. I got up off of the bed and sat down in the chair.

**_Selena's POV_**

The doctor sat down beside Demi and pulled a pen from the pocket of her jacket.

"So you're only four weeks gone correct?"

"Yes that's right." I confirmed as I gently stroked the head of my sleeping brother.

"Have you thought about what you're doing with the baby?"

"Yes I'm keeping it." I stated.

"Are you sure that's a good idea. Your parents aren't around and that would be a tough, near impossible thing to do alone."

"I'm not alone, I have Demi."

"And who's Demi?" She asked, confused.

"I'm Demi." Demi reached to her left and shook the doctors hand.

"What are you in relation to Selena?"

"I am Selena's teacher and also her brother, Max's, temporary foster mom, Selena lives with me."

"I see and you'd be willing to help support her financially and be there for her?"

"Of course I will." She nodded.

"Okay then Selena we have to talk about some things you should expect at this stage."

"I'm ready to hear it."

"You may start to become bloated, you can get mild cramping and small amounts of bleeding but that's normal and you will get bad mood swings." I grimaced at this new information. "You need to find an OB but you will not need to visit the obstetrician for a while yet."

"Oh okay then I'll make sure that's dealt with."

"Okay, do you have any questions?"

"Yes, can I still do PE?"

"PE will be fine to do at the moment but as your pregnancy progresses you need to be seriously careful." She warned.

"Will do."

"Okay I'll leave you alone but I do think there's some police here to talk to you."

The nurse was right because as soon as she left the room, two police officers came waltzing in.

"I am going to have to ask you to leave Demetria."

"Um okay, bye Selena." She sent me a smile that would look completely innocent to onlookers but I knew the hidden meaning.

"Bye."

The man and woman sat down where the nurse and Demi had been previously seated.

"Okay so we have Stacey and Cameron in custody and we need to get your statement." The woman told me.

"Okay then. So it started one day when I ended up kissing Miley Cyrus, I didn't know at the time but that was all just a trap and Stacey was nearby to take pictures. I was feeling confused and when Miley fell out with me over it I ended up doing some sexual things with a boy called Steven; so that he would give me a hit of his weed. Then Stacey was there to take a picture as well and that was just a trap. Ever since that day they terrorised me and sent me notes. One day I got the two pictures in the mail and it said to meet them in the toilets at school. I didn't want the pictures leaked so I went along with it. When I got there Stacey and Miley were there, Stacey started having a go at me but Miley just stood there timidly. Then Cameron appeared form inside the cubicle and he raped me. I later found out that it had all been filmed. After that day I completely broke down, I started to cut myself and make myself throw up. I was living alone with my little brother Max and he was completely oblivious to the whole thing. They continued to terror me and make my life hell. Miss Lovato was around to help me then and she took all the sharp things out of my house and so I had no way of cutting. But then I found one of my mother's bottles of alcohol and I got se drunk that I passed out. I nearly died and that's when I was forced to enter rehab; I got better and then the tape was shown at school today." I explained.

"We have plenty of sufficient evidence to put Cameron away for rape and Stacey for accessory to rape. Would you like Miley to be charged as well?"

"No, she was being manipulated by Stacey and couldn't get out, she never wanted to do any of this to me."

"Well that's all we needed to hear, would you like some therapy sessions to deal with this?"

"No, it happened four weeks ago and I've been to rehab and stuff since then, I've got this on lock down."

"We just need to ask a few questions about Demetria Lovato." The man stated.

"Okay, ask away."

"Is she doing anything to you inappropriately or forcing you to do anything you don't want to?"

"What?! Of course not, I think it's disgusting that you would even suggest that."

"We have to check up on these sorts of things and why do you think it would be so strange?"

"She's like a big sister that I never had and a mother figure that I always needed. If it wasn't for her I'd be dead and we wouldn't be sitting here right now. The thought sickens me and I just find it hurtful to suggest such a horrible thing about her because she really doesn't deserve it. I owe my life to that woman and she's the one who's caring and supporting my baby brother and he's the most important thing in my life."

"Okay then I think that's all cleared up. We will be in touch to discuss how the trial is going." And with that they got up and left the room.

…

"Lena what happened today?" Max asked me sweetly.

We were all back at home again, Demi towards the back of the sofa, me cuddling up to her and then Max cuddling up to me on the edge. It's Sunday night and I have to go back to school tomorrow with Demi.

"It's really complicated buddy but basically something happened that really upset me and it just caused some things to go wrong."

"Oh okay, is everyone okay now?"

"Yes everyone's perfect."

"Can I go to sleep now?" He asked me.

"Course."

I lifted him up into my arms and carried him carefully to his room. Once he was tucked in I bent down and pecked his forehead.

"I love you, sleep tight."

"I love you too."

**There is going to be some Demi/Selena loving next chapter. Six reviews till I update:')**


	31. Tonight is our night

_Sorry that I haven't updated in so long but my laptop broke __**again**__ and I've been busy with school:/ _

* * *

_ Selena's POV_

You would be seriously underestimating my life if you were to say my school year so far has been bad. We're only just starting October now and I've already been in rehab, I've been raped, I'm pregnant and I have a girlfriend who's my teacher. The latter is the only thing that's gone right. Demi is the only thing that brought me happiness last month apart from Max but he's been there all along. That's why I think it's time. It's time to finally give myself to my girlfriend fully.

I'd just finished putting Max to bed and now I'm sat beside Demi on the sofa. I know that I want it and I know that I'm ready for it but I'm just afraid that she'll reject me. I don't think I can take anymore pain or humiliation.

"He should be asleep soon." I informed the older girl.

"Yeah so what do you want to do?" She moved closer to me as she spoke. Does that mean she wants the same as me? Is it a signal or is she just wanting to cuddle?

"Umm I don't mind what about you?" I stuttered, mentally scolding myself for the slip up.

"Why are you so nervous?" Demi asked.

"I'm not." I lied.

"Sel don't lie to me please?" I can never look at her sad face and not tell the truth.

"I really think that tonight is the night for us if you get what I'm trying to say and I'm just frightened that after everything that's gone on, you're not going to want me anymore." I admitted.

"Selena I love you so much and I don't care about your past; obviously I care that you were hurt and I care that you were put through shit but it doesn't change how I feel about you! You're still the same beautiful girl who's so funny, sweet and kind. I love you more than life."

"And I love you too."

I closed the gap between us and connected out lips in a fiery passion. I was no longer scared that she didn't want me, that thought was long gone. As our clothes shed I got more and more hot inside.

"Are you sure about this?" She questioned, her mouth still latched onto my neck.

"So sure." I managed to say.

She swiftly picked me up and practically raced to our room. We were both pretty hot and heavy and wanted a release bad. I was thrown onto the bed and Demi was immediately on top of me.

"I really do love you." She smiled as she unclasped my bra.

"I really love you too." I smiled as I did the exact same to her.

This was the first ever time where we were seeing each others boobs and oh my god I nearly came just looking at hers. She's the definition of perfect and all her assets are just as good.

"You're so perfect." I informed her with a love sick grin.

She replied by taking my nipple in her hot wet mouth. The sensations she was causing were sending me to heaven. I'd never felt anything like that before. I couldn't help the moans that kept slipping from my lips.

Her mouth started to travel south and she left sweet butterfly kisses all down my belly. She hesitated when her face came in contact with my panties but the second I gave her the nod they were ripped off.

"Are you really sure?" Her concern made my heart ache.

"I want to do this. We're not just fucking this means more. I want us to make love." I whispered suddenly feeling very shy and embarrassed.

"You know what?" She asked and I shook my head, "you're too cute." And then she began to slowly work magic with her tongue.

The feelings it gave me were bliss and soon she was rubbing, biting and nibbling my clit sending waves of pleasure throughout my body. The groans and moans were leaving my body literally every second. I didn't last long and around a monute later I was covering her entire face with my juices.

"You taste so good." She stressed the 'so' and beamed up at me.

"I bet you taste even better though." I smirked.

"There's only one way to find out." She laughed.

And with that I flipped us over and repeated the whole thing except this time Demi was getting the pleasure.

**I know this is short but I wanted to give you an update and this is crucial to the story:) please read the first chapter of my story 'why is love so hard?' And check out my one shot 'How to save a life.' Thanks guys. 6 reviews till I update.**


	32. Horny details

Selena's POV

I got to stay at home for a week after the whole suicide attempt fiasco and today is my first day back at school I'm nervous and I'm scared. What if people still treat me like shit? What if they make fun of me? I'm truly petrified.

"You ready to go baby?" Demi asked as she wrapped her arms around my waist. I leaned into her body and sighed at the warmth.

"Yes but I'm worried." I admitted.

"I'll be there for the whole day and you can just come to me if you need me."

…

Demi decided that it would be best if she took Max to school and I just went to meet Taylor; just like the day the video was showed. I hadn't actually spoken to Taylor since that day, she'd tried to call me but I was too afraid to answer; too afraid that she'd hate me. The whole story ended up on the news and now literally everyone knows.

As I approached the gates to the school I spotted my best friend standing alone and she seemed completely spaced out.

"Taylor?" I whispered as I met her figure.

"SELENA!" She screamed grabbing me. It caused a lot of noise and everyone began to look at us but I didn't care. Right now it was just me and her and that's all that mattered.

"I'm so sorry." I choked trying my best to hold back the tears that were about to fall.

"Why are you sorry? You have nothing to be sorry about." She grabbed my hand and laced our fingers together as if she was preventing me from leaving again.

"I screwed everything up and I didn't answer your phone calls." I sobbed.

"That's fine, you were going through a lot of shit and it completely breaks my heart. I need you to tell me what's going on with your life in future though." I squeezed her hand tighter, trying to gain courage as we walked through the gate.

"Selena I'm so truly sorry!" "Selena I shouldn't have done what I did, please forgive me!" "Selena I didn't mean anything that I said!" These were just some of the shouts that I heard as I made my way through the crowd.

I wasn't holding any grudges against these people after all they were just doing what they thought they needed to do.

Everything was going perfectly well until I came face to face with the girl who had thrown a rock at me the days previously. I'm not going to lie I was so scared of her, she just stared at me and didn't say a word, suddenly she lifted her arms in the air and I was certain she was going to hit me. I cowered down which just made her cry. It shocked me and I suddenly composed myself just for her to pull me into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Was all she said repeatedly into my ear.

"It's fine honestly." I began to rub her back supportively.

"It's not fine! How can you say that?" She demanded almost angrily.

"Look its all in the past now and I don't really want to bother with it." I sent her one last simple smile and then me and Taylor carried on walking.

It was as if we couldn't get away from the constant apologies and the constant attention so we made our way to tutor early.

"Demi can me and Tay come in now please?" I asked as I walked into the classroom.

"Course sweetie." I smiled dreamingly at my older girlfriend and then went to sit at the back.

"So how are things with you and our teacher?" Tay asked me.

"They're okay. We've taken our relationship to the next level now and I'm physically bonded to her which is great. But after everything that happened and all the shit I caused I still need to find a way to make it up to her." I sighed suddenly feeling more guilty about the while Rosie thing.

"What did you cause? You were ill and you had shit going on in your head and what happened was not your fault." I suddenly remembered that Tay basically knew nothing about what had happened.

"I cheated on Demi with some girl from rehab. I wanted to forget her and move on because I thought she'd be better off without me. I kissed Rosie and she was feeling me up underneath my top and that's all I did but still it's cheating and Dems didn't deserve that." I nearly cried just by re-hashing the memories.

"Selena look, Demi's obviously forgiven you so you need to forgive yourself." Taylor was right but its just I'd let the one person who'd been there when I needed them down and it made me feel shit.

"I'll try." There was silence for a while and then Taylor started laughing hysterically. "What you laughing at?"

"You took your relationship to the next level you kinky slut." She teased. The words stung even though I knew it was pure banter. After all the shit that Stacey caused words like that couldn't be processed as jokes in my head anymore. "Shit babe I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have said that!"

"It's cool Tay and yeah we did. It was seriously so amazing and she's just so perfect I lov-"

"Okay okay I don't need to know all the horny details! She is my teacher." Taylor cut me off and began to blush bless her.

"I was only going to say I love her, sheesh." I started to laugh and my beautiful best friend joined me.

"Yeah I'd prefer the horny details to be kept just between you and me." I suddenly grew quiet and quickly looked up. Demi was looking extremely amused and not angry so that was a good sign. "You weren't exactly talking quietly."

"I'm sorry baby." I pouted.

"It's a good job you're cute." Taylor started laughing and I couldn't help but join in.

**Demi's POV**

Selena has been alright for around the past four days but I hadn't seen her really laugh the same as she used to until now. It's like Taylor brings out the youth and happiness in the young girl and I love that. I'll make sure that the two girls are around each other often.

I was about to make another comment when my phone began to vibrate. It was a text from Madison.

**M: Want to meet up again today?**

**D: Um when?**

**M: Like for tea?**

**D: Well Selena is out of rehab now so it would be best if you could come to ours because I don't want to have to mess around by bringing Max and Sel and causing drama?**

**M: Mom says that's fine.**

**D: Let me ask Sel.**

"Selena my sister and parents want to meet up again is it cool if they come round tonight?" I asked. Not sure on what her answer would be.

"Yeah sure." She smiled.

"Are you ready to be meeting new people though? Like, I can say no." I didn't want to do anything that could screw up her feelings or anything.

"I'll be fine I promise." I guess I'll just have to take her word for it.

"Okay well the bells about to go so we need to go back to student/teacher love you." I beamed.

"Love you too."

**Review?:)**


	33. I'll support you

Selena's POV

School passed by pretty quickly. I was bombarded with loads more apologies and even the teachers were way more sympathetic towards me. Most of them had been quite rude to me before thinking that I was a bully and a bad girl but now they understood and they felt very sympathetic.

"My family don't know that we're together." Demi reminded me as she walked into our room.

"Yes, I'm aware. You've told me about fifty times already." I teased as I pulled her in for a kiss.

"I know and I'm sorry it's just I'm so nervous." She began to shake and I could tell that she was completely bricking it.

"Do you want to tell them?" I asked.

"I'm not sure what if they take it badly?" I looked deep into her eyes and saw the pure fear.

"They won't and besides they've lost you once already they won't lose you again."

"Promise me you'll never leave me." She whispered.

"I promise." This time she initiated the kiss but it only lasted a few sweet moments before the doorbell rang and we had to pull apart.

I was petrified as I walked down the stairs behind Demi. I'd never met these people before and I was terrified of what they'd think of me.

Demi's pov

I gave each of my family members a hug and a kiss on the cheek and then welcomed them into the house. I could tell that Selena felt awkward and I didn't want her to have to feel that way.

"Selena this is my family and family this is Selena." I explained as I stood back to let them mingle. I heard a mix of 'nice to meet you's' before we were walking into the kitchen.

"I've cooked us some pasta so if you guys want to go and sit down we'll bring it right out." I told them.

I waited until they'd left the room before I turned to Lena.

"You okay baby? You seem stiff." I rubbed the sides of her arms soothingly in an attempt to calm the younger girl.

"I'm just scared that they're going to hate me." She confessed.

I pulled her into my arms and placed a loving kiss on the top of her head, "they won't hate you. That's impossible." I smiled.

"You really know how to charm a girl."

"That I do baby. Now go and get max." I slapped her bum lightly as she walked away and she sent me a wink in return.

...

The dinner is going quite smooth so far. Madison and Selena seem to be getting on alright and my parents seem to like her. I'm just scared about the whole revelation. Should I tell them? I can't decide?

"So um how are things going Selena? I saw the news." I can't fucking believe that she brought that up!

"Mom!" I yelled trying to warn her to shut up about the whole rape thing.

"It doesn't matter Dems." She turned to my mom and began to answer the question, "I'm doing okay. Some days are harder than others but right now I'm happy and I have good people around me." She beamed and I knew that I was one of those people.

"Like me." Max told them.

Everyone began to laugh at his cuteness and soon he was laughing too though I'm not sure he knew what he was laughing at.

"And you have Demi." Max added.

I suddenly froze. I forgot to tell him that my family couldn't know. What if he tells them. I knew that Selena was getting the same thoughts because she immediately stopped eating.

"Yes but she could do with friends her own age. Maybe Maddy could set you up with one of her friends?" My mom suggested.

"I could do that." Madison agreed.

"I'm not really looking to date right now." Selena said trying to end the conversation.

"Because she has Demi." Seriously Max. SHUT UP.

"But she can't date Demi." My dad laughed.

"Yeah she can an-" I quickly cut Max off.

"Oh look at that it's your bedtime." He looked so confused.

"No it's not." I stood up from the table and scooped him into my arms.

"Yes it is."

When I returned back to the table, after tucking the little rascal into bed, I could sense the awkwardness.

"What was that?" My mom questioned.

I think she knew exactly what was going on but she just wanted to hear it from me.

"Obviously the two are fucking." Madison spat.

"Maddy, shut up!" I scolded giving her a glare.

"She's my age Demi! That's so weird, what were you thinking." I looked down at the table and allowed the few tears to escape.

"I'm waiting in the car." My little sister got up and walked away. She didn't even say goodbye.

"I want you to tell me what this is." My dad said as calmly as possible.

"I'm sorry dad and I'm sorry mom but I love Selena and I want to be with her. I can't deny it or lie about how I feel and she's been through enough as it is without me denying her what we both want so bad." I cried. Lena got up the second she realised I was crying and began to draw circles on my back. It was working so I looked up and flashed her a weak smile.

"Is it okay if you go upstairs so we can talk to our daughter?" My mom asked.

She looked at me for conformation so I nodded. When it was just the three of us they began to bombard me with questions.

"How long?"

"I'm not sure. It was like six weeks ago or something." I couldn't think about the exact time we got together, so much has happened since.

"Did you force her?"

"What of course not!" As if they would even ask me that.

"Have you had sex with her yet."

I didn't want to lie to my parents so I just kept quiet hoping they'd drop it.

"So you have. Do you realise how dangerous this is?"

"Yes I do. Every single time that I'm with her I think about the trouble that it could bring me but I can't stop it because I'm so in love with her that its untrue. Right now she's my everything and she's all I think about other than max. They're my family now and I provide for them and love them. Selena has been through so much and I was there every step of the way because I couldn't leave her on her own. She can make me happy and make me smile just by being in the same room as me, she doesn't even have to try. I'm was over heels for her and so I don't really give a shit about the consequences I just want to be with her." I sobbed.

My mom now had tears in her eyes too and my dad didn't seem as disappointed as before.

"I won't tell anyone about this sweetie. I'll admit I was furious when I first found out. I still don't like it now because I know the sort of trouble you could get in but I understand and as long as you're not playing this girl around or leading her on ill support you." I had never felt so touched by persons words.

"Thanks mom that means a lot. I love you."

"I love you too, we better get going and don't worry about Madison she'll come around."

**Review?**


	34. Why are you not wearing clothes?

Once my parents had left I headed for the stairs to go and find Selena. I didn't bother cleaning up the mess on the table or cleaning any dishes, I just wanted my girl.

"Aww baby what happened?" Selena asked as I walked into our bedroom.

I let some more tears fall and then crept up on the bed between Selena's legs so that I could place my head on her chest and just be in her arms.

"Everything is just going wrong." I sobbed.

Usually I'm the one who has to protect Sel but there comes a time when I just can't be the strong one.

"It's only going to be okay princess. Madison will come round and open up to the idea, she's just shocked. She loves you so much and you know that she does! After all the effort she put in to see you again, of course she cares." She soothed.

I felt her place a warm, sweet kiss on my cheek and I melted into her embrace.

"Thanks so much baby! My parents did say that they will support us but I know that they don't agree with it still." I stressed.

"Well at least they're trying to understand, that's something." She smiled.

"I guess you're right." I sighed.

"Just think about a week from now when school isn't on and we're out chilling in Florida by the pool in our bikinis." She said suggestively, running her hands up and down my sides.

Her hands on my skin immediately turned me on and I flipped round so that I was straddling the younger girl. I tried to bat her hands away but she just kept returning them to my waist.

"Selena you need to stop." I whispered.

"Um, no." She smirked.

Her hands started to travel down my body so they were resting on my thighs and that's when I lost it. I attacked her lips with my own in a ravaging kiss.

"You're so hot." She moaned in-between kisses.

"Says you." I groaned as I yanked her top off.

She quickly did the same to me and began to roughly grab at my boobs. We'd already had the sweet, loving first time and now it was just all about the passion.

"Ugh Lena." I moaned, biting down on her shoulder and neck leaving marks on my trail.

Soon enough the rest of our clothes were discarded and we were writhing around on the bed wildly pumping into each other. I felt Selena's teeth close around the side of my neck and the familiar sucking feeling alerted me that she was giving me a hickey. I shouldn't have let her do it because of school but it just felt so good.

"That was amazing." I panted once we'd both climaxed and were lying side by side on the bed.

"It really was." Selena agreed.

"Got me pretty tied not gonna lie." I chuckled.

"Want to go to sleep?" She asked.

"Yeah."

I pulled the gorgeous girl closer and pecked her on the lips lightly before covering us with the blanket and falling to sleep with a huge smile on my face.

…

Selena's POV

I was woken with a start when I felt sudden extra weight on the bed. I opened my eyes to see Max staring down at me.

"Why aren't you wearing clothes?" He asked.

I looked down and saw that nothing was showing but it was obvious that I wasn't dressed I glance to my side to see Demi still fast asleep and the same applied for her.

"We were too hot." I lied, "Now why don't you go and get dressed and then go downstairs little man."

"Alright Lena." I kissed him on the forehead and then watched as he ran out the door shutting it behind him.

I glanced at the clock and realised it was eight, we were running late. I reached over and began to shake the girl beside me feeling immense pain as I did so. I looked down at my shoulder and saw a big purple, nasty looking bruise and I could tell that there were some on my neck too because the pain was the same there.

"Demi baby! I said shaking the beautiful girl beside me.

She slowly opened her eyes and smiled at me but the smile quickly vanished when she saw my shoulder. She quickly sat up to check if I was alright but immediately regretted the decision, obviously feeling the same amount of pain I did, and fell back down.

"We should never do that again." She cried clutching her arms to her chest.

"It was pretty hot sex though." I defended.

"Yeah but how are we supposed to cover all this now?" She moaned.

**Sorry about the LOOOOOOOOONG ass wait but I finally feel like writing again and I know this is only short but I just wanted to get a review to you if any of you actually still bother with this story aha. Please give it a review and tell me what you thought of it and all that shizz:)**


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